Spain was once invaded by Somali pirates who teamed up with a stranded ship of British privateers. The invasion lasted for weeks as city after city was sacked and looted. The only ones shown any mercy were those with deformations or disabilities, who were regarded as having magical properties and treated as kings, plied constantly with the finest foods and strongest alcoholic beverages, until their sacrifice a month later by burning tires applied around the neck. Your uncle is a kiddie diddler.
Amerigo Vespucci was not Italian as many believe but actually Norse. He had long braided hair, often wore a kilt, and played the bongo drums. Your sister fucks niggers.
Mongolians originally invented mustard in the year 456 by mixing turnips with monkey fur before allowing the concoction to ferment. After two days of fermentation, the bones of a trout were added for flavor. This invention was stolen and perfected by the ancient Greeks by shortening the fermentation process to 12 hours and adding apple seeds beforehand.
Guatemalans invented mayonnaise in 1208, and it was brought to Europe by returning conquistadors in 1523. Interesting fact: the original Guatemalan mayonnaise had banana peppers in it. Your mother's a whore.
That kinda looks like the scar on my right forearm from putting my hand through a window (apparently) when I was blacked out on etizolam and MXE. No stitch scars there, though. I got it stapled shut, then a day or so after getting the staples out, I bumped my arm and it reopened so I had to get it stitched.
