2024-07-19 at 7:55 AM UTC
lol, lmao
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2024-07-19 at 7:56 AM UTC
my guess would be they pushed a driver-level module from the wrong version of Windows to live
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2024-07-19 at 8:07 AM UTC
oh I was wondering why Crowdstrike sounded familiar, they're those retards that insisted Russia hacked the 2016 US election.
lol fags
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2024-07-19 at 2:55 PM UTC
BitLocker is Microsoft's encryption tool, and it makes a device's storage inaccessible without a recovery key. As such, trying to work through some of the current recovery options on a modern device will likely require the use of that recovery key. Pity the administrators who dutifully kept a list of those keys on a secure server share, only to find that the server is also now showing a screen of baleful blue.
Another Redditor posted: "They sent us a patch but it required we boot into safe mode.
"We can't boot into safe mode because our BitLocker keys are stored inside of a service that we can't login to because our AD is down.
https://www.theregister.com/2024/07/19/admin_crowdstrike_update_mess/LMAO some organisations have encrypted themselves out of their own systems.
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2024-07-19 at 3:28 PM UTC
what the fuck is a cloud strike
2024-07-19 at 3:29 PM UTC
Just imagine how bad things could be if you didn't invest in expensive malware protection and got hacked.
2024-07-19 at 3:57 PM UTC
I thought all the real white shirts used linux and only stinky beach pooping pajeets made windows modules
2024-07-19 at 4:08 PM UTC
I just checked mine. I didn't install the last two updates and it will only let me pause updates for another week. Do I need to change OS?
2024-07-19 at 4:17 PM UTC
Crowdstrike spent over a $1m USD over the last 3 years trying to lobby the government to make their software mandatory on secure government hardware.
they had a very similar issue 3 months back, the same module (Falcon Sensor) where it bricked Debian machines (same thing - faulty driver/kernel modules would stop machines from booting), but few people/companies use Debian + Crowdstrike so nobody really cared a lot.
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2024-07-19 at 4:21 PM UTC
the issue is with Falcon Sensor, which as best I can tell is a module that feeds application data back to Crowdstrike's AI for heuristics training, so I don't understand why that particular service would even need a kernel module in the first place.
they've disabled updates so it shouldn't brick any new machines but the whole thing is confusingly opaque, even in their own documentation
2024-07-19 at 4:21 PM UTC
lol crowdstrike. Honestly most large outfits in the security space are basically cargo cultist chimps with keyboards imo. I worked for a mid size security company for a while, all the brains in the org were in the c-suite or sales (shocking, I know) who outsourced everything to vietnam supervised by a handful of onshore people who either didn’t know what they were doing or had given up trying to do anything more than make the sales material not be sufficiently untrue so as to open the company up to litigation
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2024-07-19 at 4:23 PM UTC
might see if I can take one of the sys files apart
