I called in work today

1. 2021-03-31 at 11:37 PM UTC

   #1
   

   Robert Mugabe African Astronaut
   I'm energised, my dead cat is still rotting in my parent's back yard and the brakes are out!
   
   I didnt wanna mess up my perfect home record but I know me and I know I'm not going to.
   
   Might as well take another ME day because it's not like I'm going to have anytime this weekend...LOL!. EVERY DAY is an Easter Bunny Holiday (snorts a fat line off a fat girl's ass).
   
   
   I forget how much time I can miss but I know I can miss not working like a blue collar dumbass in a plastic factory.
   
   
   
   
   
   Besides, imagine working 10 hour shifts like a retard and even if I went in "I'd probably do a shit job and have a false outage episode."
   
   
   Can't have that.
   
   
   
   UH-HUH
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • BeeReBuddy, 
   • Wariat
2. 2021-03-31 at 11:40 PM UTC

   #2
   

   livingelegy motherfucker [my polyoicous forward graciousness]
   Shut the fuck up, nigga!
3. 2021-03-31 at 11:54 PM UTC

   #3
   WellHung Black Hole
   🤭
4. 2021-03-31 at 11:57 PM UTC

   #4
   

   BeeReBuddy motherfucker [pimp your due marabout]

   Originally posted by Robert Mugabe I forget how much time I can miss but I know I can miss not working like a blue collar dumbass in a plastic factory.
   
   

   LOL
5. 2021-04-01 at 12:49 AM UTC

   #5
   

   Robert Mugabe African Astronaut
   Folks?
6. 2021-04-01 at 1:13 AM UTC

   #6
   

   Ghost Black Hole
   that wasn't even slightly funny. Even cock nose has better insults than you with the saturnite ears shit which I totally stole from him.