Cooking pizza rolls without them bursting open

1. 2016-12-22 at 9:03 AM UTC

   #1
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   HAS IT EVER BEEN DONE?
2. 2016-12-22 at 9:20 AM UTC

   #2
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Just scoop the filling that leaks out with the pizza roll and eat the whole thing
3. 2016-12-22 at 9:28 AM UTC

   #3
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Only once.
4. 2016-12-22 at 9:31 AM UTC

   #4
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle

   Originally posted by Hash Slinging Slasher Just scoop the filling that leaks out with the pizza roll and eat the whole thing

   
   Thanks but that's not why I asked. THANK YOU.
5. 2016-12-22 at 9:32 AM UTC

   #5
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle

   Originally posted by the holy ghost Only once.

   
   LIES FROM THE DEN OF INIQUITY
6. 2016-12-22 at 9:37 AM UTC

   #6
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Originally posted by mmQ Thanks but that's not why I asked. THANK YOU.

   
   But you never said why you asked
7. 2016-12-22 at 9:44 AM UTC

   #7
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle

   Originally posted by Hash Slinging Slasher But you never said why you asked

   
   EXACTLY. RAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE
   
8. 2016-12-22 at 9:54 AM UTC

   #8
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   It's a lot like cooking babies.
   
   Long and slow jimmy,, long and slow. Short and high makes em pop.
   
   
   
   

   Originally posted by Hash Slinging Slasher Just scoop the filling that leaks out with the pizza roll and eat the whole thing

   
   And melt my flesh off and get 3rd degree burns? Are you insane?.
   
   
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • kroz
9. 2016-12-22 at 10:04 AM UTC

   #9
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Originally posted by SCronaldo_J_Trump It's a lot like cooking babies.
   
   Long and slow jimmy,, long and slow. Short and high makes em pop.
   
   
   
   
   
   And melt my flesh off and get 3rd degree burns? Are you insane?.

   
   If you can't pick up a pizza roll and scoop the filling up without touching the pan you have problems
   
   And if you get third degree burns from touching said pan you have bigger problems
10. 2016-12-22 at 10:11 AM UTC

    #10
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by Hash Slinging Slasher If you can't pick up a pizza roll and scoop the filling up without touching the pan you have problems
    
    And if you get third degree burns from touching said pan you have bigger problems

    
    
    I don't touch food while its cooking, I tried scooping some cheese crap from a frozen chicken thing and burnt the fuck outta my hand tonight. Pizza pockets become dangerous at high temperatures. I can imagine torturing someone by heating one of these for 5 minutes in a microwave and squirting the goop in their face
    
    
    
    
11. 2016-12-22 at 12:46 PM UTC

    #11
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    ^ They do that in prison here, probably America too, but putting sugar water into a microwave and chucking it on people. Shit sticks and burns apparently
12. 2016-12-22 at 4:32 PM UTC

    #12
    

    bling bling Dark Matter
    poke wif a fork like sosougas
13. 2016-12-22 at 5:15 PM UTC

    #13
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by SCronaldo_J_Trump I don't touch food while its cooking, I tried scooping some cheese crap from a frozen chicken thing and burnt the fuck outta my hand tonight. Pizza pockets become dangerous at high temperatures. I can imagine torturing someone by heating one of these for 5 minutes in a microwave and squirting the goop in their face
    
    

    
    You do that after its cooking, when you go to eat it
    
    And I thought you meant the little tiny pizza rolls
14. 2016-12-22 at 7:26 PM UTC

    #14
    

    bling bling Dark Matter
    stab stab stab
15. 2016-12-22 at 8:01 PM UTC

    #15
    

    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink

    Originally posted by reject ^ They do that in prison here, probably America too, but putting sugar water into a microwave and chucking it on people. Shit sticks and burns apparently

    
    here in texas prisons I've heard niggas heating up a butter finger and stabbing someone with it or throwing it at the them.
16. 2016-12-22 at 8:04 PM UTC

    #16
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    You really gotta hand it to criminals, they're creative and resourceful as fuck
17. 2016-12-22 at 8:04 PM UTC

    #17
    

    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    In the ND prison we just make you a perfectly cooked hot pocket and sit down with you to talk out our differences.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

    • The Self Taught Man
18. 2016-12-23 at 12:12 AM UTC

    #18
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by mmQ In the ND prison we just make you a perfectly cooked hot pocket and sit down with you to talk out our differences.

    
    Well thats just down right humble, what happens if you fuck up the hot pocket though?.
    
19. 2016-12-23 at 1:13 AM UTC

    #19
    

    mmQ Lisa Turtle

    Originally posted by SCronaldo_J_Trump Well thats just down right humble, what happens if you fuck up the hot pocket though?.

    
    Then it's scalding hot pocket goop to the face, why of course. :)
20. 2016-12-23 at 9:51 AM UTC

    #20
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    If you're making them in the microwave, stick a glass of water in there. It'll keep the rolls moist and stop them from expanding. You can also use this to send some stale bread back in time.