User Controls

HOW TO COMMIT SUICIDE PERFECTLY

  1. #1
    Your Father Yung Blood
    HOW
  2. #2
    the little girl Tuskegee Airman
    tldr
  3. #3
    Your Father Yung Blood
    :)
  4. #4
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    1. park your car in front of a telephone pole.
    2. kick out your rear window.
    3. take a 20m chain and tie it to the pole, run it into the car through the rear window hole.
    4. sit in the driver's seat, tie the other end of the chain around your neck.
    5. make any other fun preparations like setting the car on fire or gluing your hands to the steering wheel, etc.
    6. start the car, jump on the accelerator
    7. profit
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. #5
    Your Father Yung Blood
    cleanup might be a little rich.
  6. #6
    Robert Mugabe African Astronaut
    The Malice method seems painless.
  7. #7
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    1. Remove tire on car
    2. Place head directly under wheel rim
    3. Trigger jack release

    Note: Legs will stiffen like pencils and splay out dramatically for three seconds
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  8. #8
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by Robert Mugabe The Malice method seems painless.

    There is a reason pentobarbital is used in lethal injections. Malice was smart to take it with an anti-emetic, since the ROA was oral. You fall asleep and stop breathing if you take enough. It was also considerate of him to leave a note that said "Suicide". On it. Makes the ME job easier, with no external injuries you run toxicology and bingo bango bongo. A good ME would do their due diligence though, and since we have access to the report, i'm pretty confident they did.
  9. #9
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Malice may have been murdered.
  10. #10
    Robert Mugabe African Astronaut
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Malice may have been murdered.

    That is such a Spectral thing to say.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  11. #11
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Malice may have been murdered.

    For murder by poison the OP method works best. If you care about getting away with it.
  12. #12
    livingelegy African Astronaut [my polyoicous forward graciousness]
    Sodium cyanide is another easy method. You can easily get a hold of it since it's used in jedielery crafting and restoration to purify Gold. Just go to your local jedielers and ask for some cyanide, you can claim you're restoring a gold ring and they'll sell you a small bottle of white powder. Dilute a few teaspoons into a glass of water and drink.
  13. #13
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by livingelegy Sodium cyanide is another easy method. You can easily get a hold of it since it's used in jedielery crafting and restoration to purify Gold. Just go to your local jedielers and ask for some cyanide, you can claim you're restoring a gold ring and they'll sell you a small bottle of white powder. Dilute a few teaspoons into a glass of water and drink.

    Yeah except they run tests for cyanide derivatives if they suspect foul play.
  14. #14
    livingelegy African Astronaut [my polyoicous forward graciousness]
    Originally posted by Sophie Yeah except they run tests for cyanide derivatives if they suspect foul play.

    I hadn't noticed your last post, I was actually speaking in terms of suicide methods.
  15. #15
    WIT HA
  16. #16
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by livingelegy I hadn't noticed your last post, I was actually speaking in terms of suicide methods.

    Oh, fair enough. To be honest i'd probably just Dynamite Helmet if i ever were to suicide, lol.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. #17
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    His Mom murdered him, because she thought it was the best thing for him, at that point. It was an act of mercy. She did it out of love.
  18. #18
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Your Father cleanup might be a little rich.
    Can't fault the plan tho.
    (humble suggestion to use ex wifes car)

    do it with a rental
  19. #19
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by -SpectraL His Mom murdered him, because she thought it was the best thing for him, at that point. It was an act of mercy. She did it out of love.

    Lol, delayed onset infanticide. Post-partum psychosis in reverse if you will.
  20. #20
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by livingelegy Sodium cyanide is another easy method. You can easily get a hold of it since it's used in jedielery crafting and restoration to purify Gold. Just go to your local jedielers and ask for some cyanide, you can claim you're restoring a gold ring and they'll sell you a small bottle of white powder. Dilute a few teaspoons into a glass of water and drink.

    Wouldn't you get the same result chugging a jug of bleach, though?
Jump to Top