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The most effective way to slim down with Keto, here's how.

  1. #1
    keto is when your body secretes an enzyme or something like that into your blood stream to liquidate parts of your body to be used as food.

    when this happens dont just sit around and do nothing and hope your body will get the job done, you need to direct your body to the part of your body you want to liquidate, and one of the way to get this done is to slap, repeatedly at the part of your body you wanted to trim.

    if you want to slim your belly down, then you must slap it till its red and swollen. when its red and swollen, it means that there are more blood flowing into and out of that part of your body, blood that carries that fat liquidating enzyme.

    this will result in accelerated slimmimg down of the said part.

    i know this works because i made the mistake of masturbating while experiencing keto and now my penis is 3-5% smaller. not a good idea to have lots of blood with flesh smelting enzyme in it flowing in your penis.

    try it and i guarantee you'll be amazed with the results.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. #2
    Fox African Astronaut
    Slimming down wont make kids wanna fuck you more you fat bastard
  3. #3
    Originally posted by Fox Slimming down wont make kids wanna fuck you more you fat bastard

    it will make me weight less on them.

    physically and mentally.
  4. #4
    STER0S African Astronaut [the disappointingly unanticipated slab]
    lol
  5. #5
    Octavian motherfucker
    Keto is shit. Heart murmurs and smelly dick breath which is about right for you Vinnie. Plus side is you get to eat loads of fatty foods yet burn it off. Can go all day eating little as your body burns fat. I found myself feeling lethargic and shit.

    Oh and OP is a filthy Nonce that should have his nuts cut off.
  6. #6
    Do meth
  7. #7
    Originally posted by Octavian Oh and OP is a filthy Nonce that should have his nuts cut off.

    this is actually a good idea.

    getting a little girl pregnant is a horribel, horrible thing.
  8. #8
    Ughhu Tuskegee Airman [tepidly antiquate my affinity]
    Here’s the real truth with keto diets......

    Smoke mad meth for a month or 2 and tou’ll Be dropin pounds like nobody’s bizness
  9. #9
    Best way to lose weight is by working at a moving company.
  10. #10
    Originally posted by Misguided Russian Best way to lose weight is by working at a moving company.

    not true.

    some of the fattest people ive seen are professional ice and (cooking) gas delevery persons.

    a can of cooking gas is like 22-24kg.
  11. #11
    Originally posted by vindicktive vinny not true.

    some of the fattest people ive seen are professional ice and (cooking) gas delevery persons.

    a can of cooking gas is like 22-24kg.

    Thats a delivery role. A moving company will have you load/unload an entire house/apartment, sometimes with many stairs and long hallways involved. Theres more to it but ye.
  12. #12
    Originally posted by Misguided Russian Thats a delivery role. A moving company will have you load/unload an entire house/apartment, sometimes with many stairs and long hallways involved. Theres more to it but ye.

    movers dont really move a lot in terms of gross weight.

    i dont know how you do it there with machines or not but delivery people here actually move more stuffs by weight because everything had to be move by hand. if you had to move 10 pallettes of rice it means you have to load those 10 pallets of rices into the truck by hand, and then unload them at their designated receiving points, also by hands.

    turd world country.
  13. #13
    Originally posted by vindicktive vinny movers dont really move a lot in terms of gross weight.

    i dont know how you do it there with machines or not but delivery people here actually move more stuffs by weight because everything had to be move by hand. if you had to move 10 pallettes of rice it means you have to load those 10 pallets of rices into the truck by hand, and then unload them at their designated receiving points, also by hands.

    turd world country.

    Now imagine the palets need to be moved one bag at a time from the 3rd floor without an elevator, then delivered one at a time to the second floor without an elevator.
  14. #14
    Fox African Astronaut
    I fucking hate moving. When I was in high school my broke ass dad was constantly having us switch apartments. A lot of times in the same complex. So instead of just loading our shit into a truck and then unloading it we’d have to carry every item a few hundred yards to the new place. I lost count how many times I had to haul a couple thousand pounds of worthless hoarder shit from one place to the next. I would never do it as a job. Fuck that
  15. #15
    tee hee hee Space Nigga [slangily complete this slumberer]
    In these uncertain and quickly evolving times, it is not a good idea to slim down. Keep your reserves full: you might need them.
  16. #16
    Originally posted by Misguided Russian Now imagine the palets need to be moved one bag at a time from the 3rd floor without an elevator, then delivered one at a time to the second floor without an elevator.

    most shops here dont have elevators.
  17. #17
    Fox African Astronaut
    Originally posted by tee hee hee In these uncertain and quickly evolving times, it is not a good idea to slim down. Keep your reserves full: you might need them.

    Ok fatty
  18. #18
    Fox African Astronaut
    Jk ily
  19. #19
    Originally posted by vindicktive vinny i know this works because i made the mistake of masturbating while experiencing keto and now my penis is 3-5% smaller. not a good idea to have lots of blood with flesh smelting enzyme in it flowing in your penis.

    addendum : turns out my penis did not shrink 3-5%. after having measured it empirically, it was discovered that it was just my girlfriend thats grown 3-5% bigger.

    they grow so fast around these ages.
  20. #20
    Originally posted by tee hee hee In these uncertain and quickly evolving times, it is not a good idea to slim down. Keep your reserves full: you might need them.

    i'd rather be starving scavenger than food.
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