2015-07-19 at 6:45 PM UTC
I've been getting my life on track since my phenibut overdose on june 16th but lately even with the lexapro, more lamictal, no bundy/spice and no focalin, hardly any benzedrex but one thing thats getting to me is my memories of my (first) freshman year and 8th grade, even though I was doing bundy and getting psychotic on all kinds of shit from 6th grade until now, the end of eigth grade was the best point in my life. I met up with my friend that moved in 2nd grade and we became best friends in 7th and 8th grade, I was no longer the universal punching bag at school even though people looked at me like a druggie. My former enemy and me were coo and shit trolling the shit out of everyone. Looking in my 8th grade yearbook I got a fuckton of signatures from people saying "you were the best fuckin troll you made the year good" and I kept saying poland can not into space and got everyone to say it to this kid connor
he was like poland can not WHAT into space? and everyones like, connor, poland can not into space and rau rau rau
but my life is so empty right now its sour nostalgia cause all those friends I had are out feeling like shit but theyre wasting time with people atleast. My long time friend nick is bisexual and is dating some trap he met at school but I cant even laugh at that and bust his balls because I don't go to public school now, or school. If I do my only option is behavioral school which fucking sucks.
And I took seroquel this morning hoping to get back to sleep but stayed up and then got a monster and 2 cups of coffee but I still feel like de-evolution apemode sour grapes.
2015-07-20 at 5:37 AM UTC
nostalgia is a bitch
but the good part is, there is always more stuff to do that will create nostalgia in the future for you to look back on wistfully.