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I'm in the doghouse at work

  1. #1
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    So on one of the pages I'm developing we have some legal disclosures because everything has to have disclosures. They have to come from the legal group though and they haven't figured out the copy yet, so I just threw in some text to hold the space and pad out the layout appropriately. I usually make some joke because lorem ipsum is boring. So I put in some stuff like "this product is known to the state of California to cause cancer". It was only supposed to be seen by QA who know it's a placeholder but the translation group got their hands on it and raised it to like my boss thrice removed. I got chewed out pretty royally lol, told that it was extremely unprofessional. Oh the joys of American corporate life.
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  2. #2
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Oh man, at my last job (first paid developer job for me), I would use all kinds of obscene things for internal testing stuff. A lot of our main application involved shipping and logistics stuff, and I would create shipments from:

    Sex Toy Manufacturers
    6969 {RANDOMLY_CHOSEN_BUT_EXISTING_STREET_NAME}
    Dildo, Newfoundland.
    (Actual street name and city, so latitude and longitude data would be legit).

    ...and stuff like that.

    Luckily none of it made it upstream.

    But I guess I should probably be more cautious going forward.
  3. #3
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    now im mad too
  4. #4
    Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country Dark Matter [my scoffingly uncritical tinning]
    I thought "acting professional" like that was only for those without sought after skills.

    It's a bit like complaining about the plumber not turning up in a suit and tie.
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  5. #5
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Corporate bosses have no sense of humor whatsoever. It's all just mindless CYA from dummies who care a whole lot about their gigantic paychecks. No logic or sense in their heads at all. Had to endure the same kind of immature BS for decades. Like this one time I had to hack into my own company's system (Charter Communications) to get a crew of 650 agents up and running. The in-house sys admin had just done some major upgrades and everyone was locked out, including the command center's stations, due to the sys admin's idiotic failure to restore user privileges after he was done. I arrived at 5:30am to find every station locked out and the admin long gone, with 650 agents and three other off-site centers breathing down my neck. Took me about 30 minutes and I had full access. In fact, I hacked and stole the sloppy system admin's own credentials right off the system and then used them for myself to get everyone else back online. Next morning, I get called up on the red carpet, and the dumb network admin is also in there, and he wants me fired. My operations manager just told him "hey, that's what this guy does, that's why he's here, to get shit done", but the dummy went right over the operations manager's head and tried to get me fired, crying about how it would cost him $20,000 to baseline the whole system and set it all up again and find and close the loopholes I had discovered. Then I got a scolding from the Big Boss Hog down at NOC and was warned to never do that again or I'd be fired. But the thing is, if I hadn't done what I'd done, they would have lost a lot more than twenty thousand.
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  6. #6
    Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country Dark Matter [my scoffingly uncritical tinning]
    My main problem at work is dealing with the systems, which are locked down to a ridiculous degree. It makes it more or less impossible to do anything without breaking rules, and it's something I know I am going to get in some level of trouble for at some stage.

    Also no one wants to make decisions, and I know I am being used as if stuff goes wrong I can be blamed, but I don't really care about that.
  7. #7
    Bueno motherfucker
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  8. #8
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country My main problem at work is dealing with the systems, which are locked down to a ridiculous degree. It makes it more or less impossible to do anything without breaking rules, and it's something I know I am going to get in some level of trouble for at some stage.

    Also no one wants to make decisions, and I know I am being used as if stuff goes wrong I can be blamed, but I don't really care about that.

    In this world, you can get fired for doing the right thing, or even for nothing.
  9. #9
    Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country Dark Matter [my scoffingly uncritical tinning]
    Originally posted by -SpectraL In this world, you can get fired for doing the right thing, or even for nothing.

    I'd rather take chances and get fired than not get promoted.
  10. #10
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country I'd rather take chances and get fired than not get promoted.

    I'm the opposite. I always refuse promotion past the level I feel most comfortable doing. I've declined manager positions numerous times, even at double or triple the pay. I like being on the front line, and even though, as you say, it's always racked with problems and troubles and brick walls, I really enjoy the challenge. With advancement comes more responsibility and less common sense, and I just can't be a fake ass bitch.
  11. #11
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country My main problem at work is dealing with the systems, which are locked down to a ridiculous degree. It makes it more or less impossible to do anything without breaking rules, and it's something I know I am going to get in some level of trouble for at some stage.

    Also no one wants to make decisions, and I know I am being used as if stuff goes wrong I can be blamed, but I don't really care about that.

    I find network operation administrators to be some of the most stupid and lazy people on the planet. It's really amazing the level of stupidity they operate at. I doubt most people could even deliver that kind of tree-stump-dumb "performance" if they tried their hearts out. It's like you have to have an IQ of literally less than 50 to be a network operations administrator.
  12. #12
    Common De-mominator African Astronaut
    Lmao at least you didn't mention the jedis in it.
  13. #13
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    Originally posted by Bueno what the fuck did the translation group had to say about it?

    They were like "there's some inappropriate content" but they didn't even want to say what it was for some reason so someone had to ask them twice for the actual text. The nice thing about fintech is that you don't have to do shit, the bad part is people are really uptight and everybody outside of the handful of people you interact with day to day acts like they're walking on eggshells
  14. #14
    lanny fully deserved it.

    saying that a product is carcinogenic in the state of cali is juat the same as alleging that a someone is a pedo.

    its no laughing matter, mane.
  15. #15
    Ghost Black Hole
    When I worked at Sears we would put notes in the shipments that say "i'm being held against my will" and stuff like that, it was probably a bad idea but we had a good laugh.
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  16. #16
    Admin African Astronaut
    I'm always the guy that management is trying to get to quit. Every single job. As soon as I start, people start talking shit to smear my reputation.

    Management makes it very clear that they want me gone. Everyone takes their side because they are little kissass bitches.

    I just vent by being a shitty employee and committing crimes.
  17. #17
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Places I've worked, if they want you to quit and can't find any reasonable reason to get rid of you, what they do is move you up the ladder to a higher pay grade. The bait. As a result, you end up feeling pretty good with the extra authority and stature, not to mention the extra pay, but with all that comes increased responsibility. It's pretty easy for them at that point to create a situation where they can document a "deficiency" in your "new responsibilities". You just didn't work out. Hey, we did all we could, but you just weren't meeting these kind of elevated expectations.
  18. #18
    Originally posted by Lanny So on one of the pages I'm developing we have some legal disclosures because everything has to have disclosures. They have to come from the legal group though and they haven't figured out the copy yet, so I just threw in some text to hold the space and pad out the layout appropriately. I usually make some joke because lorem ipsum is boring. So I put in some stuff like "this product is known to the state of California to cause cancer". It was only supposed to be seen by QA who know it's a placeholder but the translation group got their hands on it and raised it to like my boss thrice removed. I got chewed out pretty royally lol, told that it was extremely unprofessional. Oh the joys of American corporate life.

    You should just ban them.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  19. #19
    Admin African Astronaut
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Places I've worked, if they want you to quit and can't find any reasonable reason to get rid of you, what they do is move you up the ladder to a higher pay grade. The bait. As a result, you end up feeling pretty good with the extra authority and stature, not to mention the extra pay, but with all that comes increased responsibility. It's pretty easy for them at that point to create a situation where they can document a "deficiency" in your "new responsibilities". You just didn't work out. Hey, we did all we could, but you just weren't meeting these kind of elevated expectations.

    Couldn't they demote them though?

    Also, what if the bait isn't taken.
  20. #20
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Places I've worked, if they want you to quit and can't find any reasonable reason to get rid of you, what they do is move you up the ladder to a higher pay grade. The bait. As a result, you end up feeling pretty good with the extra authority and stature, not to mention the extra pay, but with all that comes increased responsibility. It's pretty easy for them at that point to create a situation where they can document a "deficiency" in your "new responsibilities". You just didn't work out. Hey, we did all we could, but you just weren't meeting these kind of elevated expectations.

    thats a lie.

    promoting someone who they'll need to fire later on will only reflect poorly on those who did the promotion thing, and their judgement.

    none in managerial position wants that.
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