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What's the first thing you stole?

  1. #1
    mashlehash victim of incest
    Miniature MnMs underneath my shirt as I was walking out at the age of 4.
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  2. #2
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    One of these magnetic slap bracelets...

    Circa 1993. I'd have been in grade 4 or so.

  3. #3
    mashlehash victim of incest
    Wrap it around your wiener, I KNOW you are a man. Do you know what happens when you lie? You go to Hell, you go to Hell and you die!
  4. #4
    larrylegend8383 African Astronaut
    Candy from a gas station. I believe that and beer once as a teen was the only times I've stolen anything.
  5. #5
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    It's funny to think that the first thing I stole was a cheap novelty toy bracelet...

    The last thing I stole was several thousand dollars via some fraudulent checks I printed myself many years ago.

    Shoplifting cheap novelty toy bracelets is the gateway crime.

    It will inevitably lead to operating a full blown ID theft ring years later.
  6. #6
    Nil African Astronaut
    Some pop at a zellers when I was like 12.
  7. #7
    mashlehash victim of incest
    See, Larry. You're a legend.
  8. #8
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    #NotEvenOnce.
  9. #9
    larrylegend8383 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by gadzooks It's funny to think that the first thing I stole was a cheap novelty toy bracelet…

    The last thing I stole was several thousand dollars via some fraudulent checks I printed myself many years ago.

    Shoplifting cheap novelty toy bracelets is the gateway crime.

    It will inevitably lead to operating a full blown ID theft ring years later.

    Didn't you feel paranoid that you'd get caught doing the ID theft thing?
  10. #10
    mashlehash victim of incest
    That's our gadzooks
  11. #11
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by larrylegend8383 Didn't you feel paranoid that you'd get caught doing the ID theft thing?

    I worked my way up...

    Novelty slap bracelets one day, then AXE body spray another, then it's mp3 players from the electronics department...

    Then it's a bit of (credit) carding some low end products, then you're buying a special magnetic ink printer and tracking down fake ID's, etc...

    It's essentially a career/trade like any other... You learn with time and experience, and become bolder as a consequence.

    I didn't do the major stuff for long though...

    I had a moral rebirth of sorts back in like 2007/2008 and have turned completely away from crime (except drug related... I don't consider doing, buying, possessing, selling, or even manufacturing or illegally importing drugs to be a moral violation).

    Stealing/theft/fraud/etc, on the other hand, are a hard pass from ten years ago and on until eternity for me.
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  12. #12
    CandyRein Naturally Camouflaged
    I was a bout 16.. stole a niggas heart ❤️😇
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  13. #13
    Jêwelry

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  14. #14
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by ohfralala Jêwelry


    Not jedielry?
  15. #15
    That word enhancement went over my head.
  16. #16
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by ohfralala That word enhancement went over my head.

    Word enhancements are a jedi conspiracy.
  17. #17
    POLECAT POLECAT is a motherfucking ferret [my presentably immunised ammonification]
    a matchbox car
  18. #18
    DontTellEm Naturally Camouflaged
    Originally posted by CandyRein I was a bout 16.. stole a niggas heart ❤️😇

    Lol! Creeps up slowly
    I'm not sure what that means ☺️
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  19. #19
    CandyRein Naturally Camouflaged
    😂

    I snuck up like a ninja on that nigga😇❤️
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  20. #20
    DontTellEm Naturally Camouflaged
    Lol! Silly.💓
    I know a thing or two 😇
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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