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Spells that work

  1. #21
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Abilify abilify wellbutrin hocus pocus dont ask me why serotonin got me moaning I think I'd rather die. *wand wave*
  2. #22
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    Originally posted by Dissociator Recently I started getting into wicca, and a few days ago I came up with a spell called "the cunt directive"
    I'm at an inpatient facility and a bunch of the nurses let me take my meds an hour early cause u know, I'm pretty cool.
    Anyway a nurse wasn't cooperating with what I wanted so I made this spell
    "Cunt directive"
    to cast power over those in my path, influence their minds to serve me
    "espite your invalid attitude, mind over matter, power over fued. The solution lies within, I figuratively be penetrateth your weak mind and cunt, bring my intentions to the front"

    anyways, 2 days later she accidentally gave me an extra dose of subutex. LOL NOW SHE FUCKED UP. I reported this mistake to her superiors and she got fired.

    Proof witchcraft works? I think so.

    i had a similar experience when i was 16 with mdma and a bottle of vix and pig destroyer on my headphones one night before school... she was pretty pissed.

    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Back when I was a young fella-me-lad-sonofabitch I bought this book on practical witchcraft during my Ozzy Osborne phase. It detailed the process for achieving Astral projection in it…which basically consisted of the following.

    Lay a large black velvet blanket/sheet out on the floor (not sure why black velvet was important)

    Put a lit candle at each corner along with a "pile" (quantity not specified) of salt also at each corner

    remove all your clothing and lay spread eagle on the blanket (as i recall It mentioned a particularly direction…like head facing north or something but it's like 35yrs ago so I don't remember)

    Close your eyes and clear your mind, then imagine yourself floating above your body looking back down on yourself.

    It then went on to say how quick and easy it was to achieve and that at first you should limit your travels to the immediate area until you get used to it…then when you feel more confident you can go further afield.

    As I recall all I achieved was freaking my mom out when she walked in on my laying naked on a black blanket with candles around it and accusing me of trying to summon the devil.
  3. #23
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    "light as a feather, stiff as a board."
  4. #24
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    We lay together kissing lips

    We touch our heads we touch our hips

    I fill your hole and spread my seed

    Your insides know that's what they need

    Lol
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. #25
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
  6. #26
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I did get the reference . Timeless classic.
  7. #27
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by mmQ We lay together kissing lips

    We touch our heads we touch our hips

    I fill your hole and spread my seed

    Your insides know that's what they need

    Lol

    That's precisely how i woo'd my baby's mama. It's quite the dinner time conversation when we visit with the in laws over the Holliday's.
  8. #28
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    That's why I haven't gone to "dinner time conversations " in years.

    When I go I just picture how I would slowly and painfully torture every fuxking member of my family and I can't help it. The most innocent undeserving ones get the worst treatment in my head. It's bad.
  9. #29
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    I wanna do a goth chick right now so bad.

    You know when you get a food.craving like... 'i could really go for some Chinese right now... Or maybe some kind of Ethiopian cuisine"?

    Right now I want to fuck a goth chick. Where do I find one?
  10. #30
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by mmQ That's why I haven't gone to "dinner time conversations " in years.

    When I go I just picture how I would slowly and painfully torture every fuxking member of my family and I can't help it. The most innocent undeserving ones get the worst treatment in my head. It's bad.

    Only in your head? Last Christmas I got me a heart, and the very next day, I gave it away.

    Also, it's good luck to sacrifice a human family member between Christmas and New Year's day.

    So far, my contributions have been paying off in spades.
  11. #31
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I dont know. I have a bunch of money for some reason. I looked up backpage things a fee weeks ago and it was dumb. I couldn't figure it out. I called some numbers and nothing panned out. I dont even like sex
  12. #32
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by mmQ I dont know. I have a bunch of money for some reason. I looked up backpage things a fee weeks ago and it was dumb. I couldn't figure it out. I called some numbers and nothing panned out. I dont even like sex

    I thought Backpage is banned ... It's leolist now.
  13. #33
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by gadzooks Only in your head? Last Christmas I got me a heart, and the very next day, I gave it away.

    Also, it's good luck to sacrifice a human family member between Christmas and New Year's day.

    So far, my contributions have been paying off in spades.

    Murder someone irl then talk to me (PM me )
  14. #34
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    My ex roommate/fwb was a hooker. I learned the ins and outs of the industry
  15. #35
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by gadzooks I thought Backpage is banned … It's leolist now.

    I mean I googled "escorts in my area " or whatever.
  16. #36
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I once fucked my friend's girl "crystal " when she was still with him and I paid her a dollar to make it official so it wasn't cheating lol
  17. #37
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by mmQ I mean I googled "escorts in my area " or whatever.

    The asshole feds, Canada and the US, shut down Backpage... My roommate was basically unemployed for weeks. It made me realize how fucked up the government's methods are... Shutting down a hooker ad site is just going to absolutely fuck so many people over.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  18. #38
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by mmQ I once fucked my friend's girl "crystal " when she was still with him and I paid her a dollar to make it official so it wasn't cheating lol

    Damn, that ain't a bad deal.

    If I averaged out how much I paid for sex every time, it'd have to be at least a few dozen dollars per experience. I mean, dates, drinks, blah, Blah ,blah.

    I'm saving up for a high tech sex doll now.
  19. #39
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I defer to my prostitution loophole thread. Half the fucking world doesnt give a shit about sex for pay. The other half shouldn't either.

    What a joke.

    I'm saying this like it affects me but it doesnt but in principle cmon.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  20. #40
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by gadzooks Damn, that ain't a bad deal.

    If I averaged out how much I paid for sex every time, it'd have to be at least a few dozen dollars per experience. I mean, dates, drinks, blah, Blah ,blah.

    I'm saving up for a high tech sex doll now.

    That's some math m8. But do you smoke ?

    Factor in the money you dont soend on things. Lol.
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