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Things that would happen to you if you lived in a porno

  1. #1
    Title is self-explanatory. Use real life examples of your day today or other days.

    Today I talked to my teacher after class trying to clarify something. She's like 40 or so but you can tell she was once hot, apparently used to be a cheerleader. We DEFINITELY would have boned if I was in a porno. Then 10 minutes later the next teacher would come in who holds a study hall/computer time thing (this really old asian lady) and she would have joined in immediately.

    I coulda been in a milf/granny porno today.
  2. #2
    mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    Why not
  3. #3
    Mash you are so profoundly stupid sometimes I just want to pinch your cheeks.
  4. #4
    mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    I understood what to do

    One time when I was alone with my cousin, she was I'm the next room, torturing her client. I could've went in there and fine double time...but I don't want to beat an older dude.

    One of em offered to suck my dads dick
  5. #5
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    If I lived in a porno i'd id bang chickens I deliver pizza to. When they open the door I'd smirk and say "did someone order a piecza ass?"

    when i used to work downtown as a pizza guy I once was going to the bathroom and this drunk girl walked in front and walked into the bathroom so I went in with her and grabbed her by on of belt loops and threw her out of the bathroom and closed the door and locked it and she started pounding on the door screaming "asshole, I would of let you watch me pee!"

    so when i was done in the bathroom I went and told my co-worker that and he was like "lol really?" And he met her at the bathroom when she came out and started talking to her, not sure what happened.

    Another time I went to a hotel to deliver a pizza and this older couple answered the door and they were smiling at me and invited me to come in, but I didn't.

    Another time I was pretty drunk went to a hotel to deliver a pizza and these girls answered the door and they were pretty cute, they from houston but in austin because they saw that jam band "the stringcheese incident"

    they invited me into take some shots with them so I did and this one chick was drunk as fuck and sat on my lap and we made out. This fat dude was there and he told me I should probably leave and I told him he should prolly shut up. I eventually did leave because I had to get back to the store.

  6. #6
    RestStop Space Nigga
    A lot of leftover uneaten pizza. The pool boy is always paid on time but the pool is always filthy. Your wife is covered in grease every time she comes back from the mechanic.
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  7. #7
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    oh yeah and if i was in a porno as a pizza guy while answering the phone for an order i'd say in a sultry masculine voice, what kinda sausage would you like... "a sweet italian? or a smexy mexican? mmmmmmm..."


  8. #8
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Probably plowing my boss's wife downstairs on a pool table at work, when it's just her and me closing. This would go on for years and he'd never know about our aggressive sexual endeavours.

    Sometimes the 18-yr old waitress would join us and my boss's wife would teach her all sorts of tricks to practice on me. Haha
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  9. #9
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    Originally posted by mmQ Probably plowing my boss's wife downstairs on a pool table at work, when it's just her and me closing. This would go on for years and he'd never know about our aggressive sexual endeavours.

    Sometimes the 18-yr old waitress would join us and my boss's wife would teach her all sorts of tricks to practice on me. Haha

    Thats pretty hott
  10. #10
    bling bling Dark Matter
    take antidepressants everday and use brillo &^ bleach on dick every shower time
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  11. #11
    mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    Originally posted by mmQ Probably plowing my boss's wife downstairs on a pool table at work, when it's just her and me closing. This would go on for years and he'd never know about our aggressive sexual endeavours.

    Sometimes the 18-yr old waitress would join us and my boss's wife would teach her all sorts of tricks to practice on me. Haha

    Is the boss a dick?
  12. #12
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by mashlehash Is the boss a dick?

    No he's awesome. This is just a porno and anything goes for no reason.
  13. #13
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    "Don't forget to massage his balls, Jenna."
  14. #14
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    anything that involved this chick coz she is bangin hot.

    https://spankbang.com/1glm6/video/mr+meeseeks



    .
  15. #15
    "Mr. Meeseeks"

    *clicks with caution*

    Whew
  16. #16
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    i came expecting ass rapes.

    there were none.
  17. #17
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    Originally posted by benny vader i came expecting ass rapes.

    there were none.

    You can't rape the willing

    /thread
  18. #18
    mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    derpadeeew
  19. #19
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    Originally posted by mashlehash derpadeeew

    your real life porno would be washing dads smegma cock off in the shower like a good lil boy after he's done cranking it on the lazy boi, you're side lazy boi, chicken.
  20. #20
    mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    Originally posted by Bill Krozby your real life porno would be washing dads smegma cock off in the shower like a good lil boy after he's done cranking it on the lazy boi, you're side lazy boi, chicken.

    Nah nigga nah don't talk to me that way
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