2017-02-05 at 2:39 AM UTC
Seems fine. Every now and again I stick it in the freezer overnight and it doesn't smell.
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2017-02-05 at 2:41 AM UTC
kroz
weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
i have to wash my dick because i have a piece of foreskin thats still their where jizz can get under and smell bad.
its basically a second dickhole that serves no purpose except for making my long schlong curve to the left, i could put a piercing in it, but I'm not like that
2017-02-05 at 2:42 AM UTC
>government-assigned girlfriend and I go to see Avengers 20: The Milk Devil
>Tickets are $99 each (you already know this)
>Fucking forgot that it was Falcon Friday
>had to put my hawk and her parakeet in kennels. $60 an hour and the runtime was 40 hours
>Rent two hawks for $85/hour the guy says we get a third free, why not right?
>I get a small 5 gallon bucket of popcorn for $245 and they throw in 16 liters of no pulp orange juice for 50 cents
>girlfriend gets the small popcorn, a bathtub of sour skittles, and the orange juice. when the Bane clones aren't looking she dumps out her popcorn and fills the 5 gallon vat with just butter (holy shit she's so smart that's why I love her)
>pay an extra $12 each to get greased up so we can get through the door easier
>Juan-Jamal is the grease-boy today, thank god
>pay him an extra $50 to fuck my girlfriend so I can write off this kino visit on my taxes
>we get in and find our seats, pay another $100 for the blowjob machine
>sit through 10 hours of previews, one of which is an entire episode of The Big Bang Theory with all the jokes removed (which is still 41 minutes somehow)
>about halfway through the movie the lights come on and the billiards tournament starts
>girlfriend and I come in second place so the designated shooter only yells at us
>toward the end of the movie I am injected with Viagra so I know the government-mandated POV sex scene is coming up
>Scarlet Johannsen suddenly turns around and takes out her 80-year-old tits and starts sucking a dick
>switch on my blowjob machine and start fingering my girlfriend
>get free crab legs for being the first person in the theater to cum
>rental hawks see my crab legs and go fucking ballistic fighting over them
>knock over my orange juice onto the guy in front of me
>sharp shooters take them out and I am removed from the theater
>probably my best experience at AMC
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2017-02-05 at 2:59 AM UTC
kroz
weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!