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The Recovery Thread (The Other TRT)
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2020-01-25 at 6:28 AM UTC
Originally posted by AnomiesOffspring I was out buying a pizza and some sketch jamaican/trinidadian 'taxi driver' (begger) asked me for change. i told him ill hook him up if he hooks me up. he used my phone to call up some guy and asked me if i want hard or soft.
even though i explicitly said soft, this sketchy white kid shows up and hands me $100 of crack, which ive been trying to learn how to smoke for the past 15mins.
three weeks of sobriety fucked up after 6-8 months of daily use.
Oh well i guess. When this is gone I'll start from day 0 again in shame
OH DUDE FUCK
Man, I know you just got sober for a long time and I'm so proud of that
Buuuuuuut I'm also kinda geeked someone other than me is doing krek tomorrow!
nobody appreciates it but me..
i think its awesome
but its also scary and expensive
i have a drug test coming up soon so Ill end up being a good boy one way or anotherThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-25 at 6:54 AM UTC
Originally posted by Cheyes OH DUDE FUCK
Man, I know you just got sober for a long time and I'm so proud of that
Buuuuuuut I'm also kinda geeked someone other than me is doing krek tomorrow!
nobody appreciates it but me..
i think its awesome
but its also scary and expensive
i have a drug test coming up soon so Ill end up being a good boy one way or another
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2020-01-25 at 6:57 AM UTC
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2020-01-25 at 8:52 AM UTCYOU GUYS aRENT RECOVERING PROPERLY YOU FUCKS
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2020-01-25 at 9:05 AM UTCEmergherd am so sober, bored, and unemployed.
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2020-01-25 at 9:49 AM UTCBetter than being drunk and unemployed. At some point after 23 or 24 being drunk just started amplifying my depressed feelings. So id just start think8ng about what a drunken loser i was. i feel like i can still drink but. I mean if i can be trusted to keep 1300mg of methadone around and not take any extra, i feel like i could probably get drunk once a year. but idk...not in a hurry to test my hypothesis.
I felt decent today. Went i towork early. Sometimes i get these weird glimpses of me in the future being normal and successful and happy, which is always nice. I could never imagine myself before with a 9-5 jobs, a wife, being happy with anything. But if i could land a 60 or 70k a year job that didnt make me want to kill myself, a comfortable apartment, a car ilike, a girlfriend who i dont hate....i could see myself being happy and normal. God knows im a long way off from whatever, but its nice to see that im able to deal with life stuff as it comes. I got a car. im paying my insurance time. Ive got good credit. Im getting my health taken care of. Im at work every day. Ive paid off my debts. i actually pay rent and utilities. I guess i always imagined id have to be able to rob people or sell drugs tomake ends meet, but i can survive and not have to fuck people over. It seems obvious but i really could never see any kind of future for myself even as a kid.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-25 at 11:04 AM UTC
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2020-01-25 at 11:36 AM UTCSo me and my friend Jade decided to go on a drive seeing as I spend most of my days indoors as of late doing fuck all. We came across a bird in the road that just sat there, waiting to get splattered. So she's pulls over, I get out and get close to see of it's hurt or w.e. just as I'm about to pick it up it immediately flies off.
I don't know but besides doing a good deed I just had this feeling, like what just happened was an omen of sorts? Not a bad feeling, just like it meant something.
Oh yeah this was like 4 this morning lol. -
2020-01-25 at 11:37 AM UTC
Originally posted by Octavian So me and my friend Jade decided to go on a drive seeing as I spend most of my days indoors as of late doing fuck all. We came across a bird in the road that just sat there, waiting to get splattered. So she's pulls over, I get out and get close to see of it's hurt or w.e. just as I'm about to pick it up it immediately flies off.
I don't know but besides doing a good deed I just had this feeling, like what just happened was an omen of sorts? Not a bad feeling, just like it meant something.
Oh yeah this was like 4 this morning lol.
It means your life is about to fly to even further greatness, handsomeThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-25 at 5:57 PM UTCIm browsing escorts. I got angry at a girl ive been talking to, and now i have an incredible urge to wrap my hand around someones throat. I feel like paying korean 20 year olds to drop loads in their esophagus is a healthy part of the recovery process.
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2020-01-25 at 6:02 PM UTCI only smoked one floor weed yesterday. Down from 4
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2020-01-25 at 6:07 PM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER Im browsing escorts. I got angry at a girl ive been talking to, and now i have an incredible urge to wrap my hand around someones throat. I feel like paying korean 20 year olds to drop loads in their esophagus is a healthy part of the recovery process.
Lol, beats relapsing I guess. -
2020-01-25 at 6:15 PM UTCYeah. There was something to be said for genuinely just got giving a fuck about anything but i guess you can only do that forever.
SobrietyOwl grant me the serenity
To accept the thing i cannot change
The courage to change the things i can
And the wisdom to check for an adams apple before i hand over cash
Amen. -
2020-01-26 at 2:28 AM UTCI think my sobriety owl is broken
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2020-01-26 at 2:41 AM UTC
Originally posted by MexicanMasterRace I think my sobriety owl is broken
did you read the NA pdf? it helped a ton.
https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=1brmUcLC9De4D2t0GOlOdA1slnThjOhUH
after three weeks clean, i realized i might need a new brain. this one's full of spooky ghosts with insatiable demands -
2020-01-26 at 2:44 AM UTClol, sobriety thread almost as scummy as the regular retarded thread
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2020-01-26 at 3 AM UTC
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2020-01-26 at 3:02 AM UTC
Originally posted by MexicanMasterRace Nigga wtf
yes he told me the story. while larping as a woman after one of his seroquel induced dissociative episodes, this happened:
https://www.rigoremortis.com/2018/05/16/woman-slings-shit-at-tim-hortons-employees/The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-26 at 3:15 AM UTC
Originally posted by AnomiesOffspring did you read the NA pdf? it helped a ton.
https://drive.google.com/folderview?id=1brmUcLC9De4D2t0GOlOdA1slnThjOhUH
after three weeks clean, i realized i might need a new brain. this one's full of spooky ghosts with insatiable demands
You dont need a new brain you just need to stay focused and clean(ish) long enough to retrain new thought patterns and shine light on the spooky ghosts enough to see theyre just baby goats running around in pillowcases. -
2020-01-26 at 3:57 AM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER You dont need a new brain you just need to stay focused and clean(ish) long enough to retrain new thought patterns and shine light on the spooky ghosts enough to see theyre just baby goats running around in pillowcases.
can i just pay you to live with me and beat the shit out of me when the time is right?
here's what i think i did right:
-deleted+blocked all connects
-got a second job walking dogs so i wouldn't be bored/would get at least some exercise
-picked up a few new hobbies/rehashed some old ones
-tried to make an actual irl friend. didnt work and was awkward but it felt good to try
first two weeks were surprisingly easy. midway through third week it was all i would think about when i wasn't preoccupied with something else.
all it took was a fucking pizza shop being late for me ask some homeless guy for some coke and here i am smoking crack 2 days later.
it's kind of ironic to prevent this behavior by forcing myself into healthy addictions to begin with
i need to re-think my next approach (and buy you a plane ticket)
