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The Recovery Thread (The Other TRT)
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2020-01-18 at 3:35 AM UTC
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2020-01-18 at 3:45 AM UTCDon’t have time to read this whole thread but I see it’s from over 6 months ago. How long did it take for Casp to relapse
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2020-01-18 at 3:50 AM UTC
Originally posted by MexicanMasterRace Dunno how you actually get sleep on that.
What you mean? Once you have a little tolerance that's like the perfect amount for decent sedation without RLS and it's just enough to enhance your pre-sleep orgasm enough to assist in knocking you out.
I didn't take any DPH at all last night for the first time in like a month+ and ended up passing the fuck out in my work clothes and slept fairly decent aside from my single 4 am wake up session so maybe there's hope for me yet. -
2020-01-18 at 3:55 AM UTC
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2020-01-18 at 3:55 AM UTC
Originally posted by Solstice What you mean? Once you have a little tolerance that's like the perfect amount for decent sedation without RLS and it's just enough to enhance your pre-sleep orgasm enough to assist in knocking you out.
I didn't take any DPH at all last night for the first time in like a month+ and ended up passing the fuck out in my work clothes and slept fairly decent aside from my single 4 am wake up session so maybe there's hope for me yet.
Idk any perceptible amount makes me feel uncomfortable and heavy. I get tired but not sleepy, and my mind starts more easily hallucinating.
But like I said, I hallucinate anyway, so maybe that has something to do with it. 200mg or even 100mg would have my parasympathetic nervous system shocking me awake at imaginary door slams.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-18 at 3:56 AM UTC
Originally posted by MexicanMasterRace On a related note did you guys know a can of 4loko gold has 5.5 drinks in it
Of course I did, a can of Four Loko is literally the same thing as drinking an entire bottle of wine, especially the 14% versions (which come in the Sour varieties too, not just the Gold) for what, $2.50 or so? The sugar content and resulting stomach pain from consuming one is fucking brutal though.
The 12%, 16 oz, $1.70 canned margaritas I drink sometimes are almost just as brutal but they aren't quite as syrupy/sickly sweet and still get you pretty decent at ~3 drinks a can. Though slugging down 2 of them back to back still results in me writhing around in sugary agony more often than not. Probably just the whiskey-induced ulcers. -
2020-01-18 at 4 AM UTC
Originally posted by Solstice Of course I did, a can of Four Loko is literally the same thing as drinking an entire bottle of wine, especially the 14% versions (which come in the Sour varieties too, not just the Gold) for what, $2.50 or so? The sugar content and resulting stomach pain from consuming one is fucking brutal though.
The 12%, 16 oz, $1.70 canned margaritas I drink sometimes are almost just as brutal but they aren't quite as syrupy/sickly sweet and still get you pretty decent at ~3 drinks a can. Though slugging down 2 of them back to back still results in me writhing around in sugary agony more often than not. Probably just the whiskey-induced ulcers.
Tbh I just never looked it up. I thought it was more like 4 drinks??? Maybe i just forgot. Its been a long time since I had one but I just slugged one back within like 15min or so -
2020-01-18 at 4:02 AM UTC
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2020-01-18 at 2:52 PM UTC
Originally posted by MexicanMasterRace I sleep insufferably less. I'll get like 3h a night for a day or three then finally one 9h night and feel great. Then it cycles back around.
Lately i haven't been sleeping much and I'm starting to hallucinate things about my new job at night.
This
Originally posted by Solstice Of course I did, a can of Four Loko is literally the same thing as drinking an entire bottle of wine, especially the 14% versions (which come in the Sour varieties too, not just the Gold) for what, $2.50 or so? The sugar content and resulting stomach pain from consuming one is fucking brutal though.
The 12%, 16 oz, $1.70 canned margaritas I drink sometimes are almost just as brutal but they aren't quite as syrupy/sickly sweet and still get you pretty decent at ~3 drinks a can. Though slugging down 2 of them back to back still results in me writhing around in sugary agony more often than not. Probably just the whiskey-induced ulcers.
I drank some 4lokos some time ago and i like the 14 sours or the 12s cos they taste better but man... i drank 2 within like 2 hours or somethijg and i puked in my sleep and woke up and had to throw my mattress topper out and miss work for like 2 days because od the resulting hangover
I did not save money buying the cheap booze that day -
2020-01-18 at 9:20 PM UTC
Originally posted by Fox Man I kind of enjoyed him as a miserable sap. It was somehow more endearing than this born again pleasantness bullshit
its not born again anything. And far from pleasant. But going through an entire life miserable and fucked up and useless, and getting the stink of your unhappiness all over everyone youcome in contact with....is lame and fucking gay. Theres nothing romantic or beautiful or amdirable about being a weepy, numb fucked up wreck of a human being.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-18 at 9:28 PM UTCAlso sup fox paws u old niggerThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2020-01-18 at 9:38 PM UTCI just want people to believe that theres another option,So im the guinea pig. I spent 13 years believing i was just broken, or maybe i was the only sane one in a fucked up irrational world, and that everything i did was a justified reasonable response. And i felt like if i just did what i was doing long enough, life and fate would mold itself to me eventually. That even though inwas doing awful, meanspirited, violent shit- i was a good person at heart, and would continue to be that, bc thats just WHO i was. None of thats true. If you act like an asshole for long enough, you become an asshole.Abyss stares into you etc etc but with buttholes.
idk. i got sick of it. Im sick of guilt and shame and hurt8ng people. Sick of having to be someone else to get by. Sick of getting arrested. Sick of court. Sick of hav8ng to manage all my different lies to make sure they dont contradict. having to strap a bottle of pee to my taint and remember to toss it in the microwave for 10 sec before i leave BUT NOT 15 SECONDS OR ITLL BE TOO HOT AND THEYLL KNOW. Being unhappy is a crushing fucking weight. If you can harness even a little bit of that energy and do something not shit with it then why not?
tl;dr- im far from happy. i just dont want to paint the wall with my grey matter anymore. Things still suck but not quite as much. I wish i wouldve found someone to walk me throuh all this years ago.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-01-18 at 9:59 PM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER its not born again anything. And far from pleasant.
I haven’t read the thread yet but that OP looked suspiciously pleasant to me
Originally posted by “CASPER” Theres nothing romantic or beautiful or amdirable about being a weepy, numb fucked up wreck of a human being.
Yeah but it made me feel better about MYself ☹️ -
2020-01-18 at 10:08 PM UTCYou can still feel better about yourself. Just do something that makes you feelbetter about yourself.
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2020-01-18 at 10:09 PM UTC
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2020-01-18 at 10:10 PM UTC
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2020-01-18 at 10:24 PM UTC
Originally posted by Fox I don’t have anything like that. What do you do
idk. anything. cook something. lose a couple pounds. give a big bag of weed to a homeless dude. go for a drive. watch a movie. let a puppy nibble on my finger. go to a comedy show. Have a cigar. Take some deep breaths. write. gratitude.video games. volunteering. A date.
i try to remember that life isnt supposed to be “up” all the time. Life is kind of boring and tedious a lot of the time, but you can really choose to do whatever you want. Just taking one normal shit would probably make someone whohad their intestines removed cry with joy. We’re extremely lucky fucking cunts, and your brain is a multiple personality clusterfuck trying to keep you angry and tired and miserable.
for me it was a matter of deciding whether i was happy how i was, and whether i really believed my life would change if i didntforce it to. idk. There is really no alternative than to try to change or kill yourself immediately. And if most people are honest, they prefer the former- they just dont know how to go about it. Idk, I dont articulate particularly well, but the brain is incredibly adept at making you believe that what you feel is real. But like learning to lucid dream, youcan retrain your responses to everything, and be better for it.
idk. go buy a ticket to a movie. be around people. Take 10 photos with your phone. Write a fucked up joke. -
2020-01-24 at 3:56 PM UTCHaven't taken any serries for bout a week probably, feels good homie.. I been havin vivid dreams again but I wake up a lot better and earlier, which is one of my goals
Feel more ready to go and slightly less tired throughout the day
Hoping I can lose some weight & get my blood sugar back to normal before too long
I actually had a blood sugar checker thing back from nursing school but it fried itself somewhere along the way -
2020-01-24 at 3:57 PM UTCEverytime I quit a drug I have dreams ABOUT the drug 2 weeks after last using.
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2020-01-24 at 4 PM UTC
Originally posted by Octavian Everytime I quit a drug I have dreams ABOUT the drug 2 weeks after last using.
Thats much more common than it is not I think... mine are usually just really really serious and menacing instead of about drugs, but sometimes they involve them. One particularly bad one recently was about being high on meth and trying unsuccessfully to hide it from my family and it was extremely unnerving and depressing
