2019-10-22 at 8:41 PM UTC
It's like ~47,000 words long and it's something I've been working on since 2015. I have published other books in this time but I've been determined to get this one out for some reason. Not anymore. I will Frankenstein's monster the shit out of it and implant the good lines into other works. Or maybe I'll wrap it up into neat sections for social media.
Dunno but I'm tired of this story. It's way too convoluted because I didn't plan any of it and tried to make it as ridiculous as possible. Not going to give it away but there are characters named stuff like "Hippo" and "Doctor Salsa". At one point, kitchen appliances invade through an inter dimensional tear caused by aliens having gay sex. For some reason I made myself (the narrator) the antagonist so there is some weird 4th wall breaking shit where I threaten to end the book, which would end the protagonist's existence. She's also supposed to be looking for someone as her 'call to action' but I never actually materialized this, she just gets lost and ends up mixed in a lot of wild shit.
2019-10-22 at 9:08 PM UTC
Meh, writing is a skill that requires a lot of practice. Just writing you're already way closer to success than someone who's all like "I will write a book and it will be awesome - one of these days".
And most of writing is re-writing.
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2019-10-22 at 9:33 PM UTC
I would love to write, but for a video game or TV show or something. Books are gay, but I'd love to make a video game which is like a rip off of Apocalypse Now, with all the crazy behaviours turned up to eleven.
2019-10-22 at 9:37 PM UTC
THE MAN SAID TO POST A GODDAMN EXCERPT. JESUS. JUST POST ONE.
You could just say anything and we wouldn't know if it was from the book or not anyway.
Jeremy set his book down; fucking done. He was just done. Done reading. Done caring. Done giving a shit. Nobody mattered to him anymore and he finally realized that, as well, he mattered to nobody else.
2019-10-22 at 10:14 PM UTC
"The first cigarette of the morning is the best," Wren said. "That's the one that wakes you up. It's the only cigarette that matters."
"Well..." Sudo paused to take a puff. "What about the second and third cigarette? Those are pretty good too. And the last one's not bad either."
"Oh the last one's the worst."
"The worst?" Sudo questioned.
"The worst," he reiterated. "The last cigarette of the day is truly a dreaded thing. It's the tired cap to yet another night on this awful fucking planet. But the first? The first cigarette has hope. You can step outside and think of things like: 'Maybe it'll get better today. Maybe today I'll quit smoking. Maybe today I'll meet the girl of my dreams'. The last cigarette has no maybes. It's cold and dark and depressing, and there's no hope of quitting with it. There's no hope of anything."
"Yeah, okay," Sudo said. His face flickered with orange as Wren struggled to light another cigarette. They had been smoking all night.
"The second is alright though. Third one too. It's just that last one I don't like." Wren stared down at the floor. A cat meowed in the distance. "Hey, can you pass me another beer?"
"Sure."
The two sat for some time, contemplating which cigarette of the night would be their last. Wren hoped to at least get another five in.
"Hey I think it's happening," Sudo said. "Look."
Wren half-sat out of his chair, glancing briefly at the sky beyond the window. "Oh yeah, it's happening alright. Pass me the lighter would you?"
"How long do you think it's going to take?"
"I don't know."
"Really though, how long?" Sudo asked. "An hour, two?" The sky was quickly turning to a vibrant yellow. Wren stood up to close the curtain.
"I think less than that. Maybe just a few more lines of dialogue. I was watching the news this morning and they said it could be a matter of seconds."
"Oh. Okay." The thought of having a beer passed briefly through Sudo's head, but he had already decided that he wouldn't. It was best to stay in Allah's good graces during these final moments.
"So is there anything you want to talk about? Anything at all?" Sudo wiped the sweat from his brow. The room was getting hotter.
"No," Wren said, taking a long pull from his diminishing cigarette. "I think this is it though."
"Is it?"
"Yeah," he said, scratching at his beard. "Well, no. One more. I'll have one more. You have that lighter again?"
"Sure man. Anything." Sudo handed over the lighter, wishing it was a BIC. Why hadn't they gotten a BIC?
Wren cupped his hands over the faithful stick and took a drag, making the room glow orange for the last time, as they drifted slowly, but surely, into the sun.
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2019-10-22 at 11:52 PM UTC
also the cat is Chootie's ghost
2019-10-23 at 8:27 PM UTC
I'm not giving up on this thread tho
2019-10-23 at 8:40 PM UTC
No no that was adorable. Kind of Bukowski esque but not quite.
I think I like your writing style because it reminds me of my own and so basically I'm just complimenting myself with that statement. We dont have as an in depth vocabulary as some people but you dont need one to write well. Your sentence structure could be a little better but hahaha I'm just saying that like what do I know ? Look at my structure. It sucks. Also use some semi colons . Nevermind dont. I like to force them every now and then because it feels like they should be a part of a good writers repertoire but forcing anything is always a bad move. That's all for now. I can critique more if you want.
2019-10-23 at 8:50 PM UTC
I never know when to use semicolons. Sometimes I put them in and then like 3 months later I take them out because i question myself. Fuck semicolons. Whoever invented them should be drawn and quartered.
2019-10-23 at 8:53 PM UTC
who needs commas (,) when you can just put the word "and" in its place...
the bike had pedals, wheels, and a frame
or
the bike had pedals AND wheels AND a frame :)
2019-10-23 at 8:56 PM UTC
Jokes aside. Nobody ever uses them on this site. I am the only one. I've never seen one in anybody's posts save for once or thrice. Out of billions.
People will argue that "well yeah mq this is NIS nit a platform to explore shit like that and we are just shit posting!"
But no. People dont know how to use it; in general. It's not easy.
2019-10-23 at 8:56 PM UTC
sentence run ons are great for those who suffer from psychological disorders like autism. they will literally get stuck until the period is found hahahahahahahahaha
2019-10-23 at 8:57 PM UTC
thegirlisbigandshelikesthewatermelonpinkandseedless.
