just ate some mayo that had been left in my broken fridge for 5-6 weeks on a sandwich

1. 2019-09-01 at 3:37 AM UTC

   #1
   

   OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III African Astronaut
   will i die?
2. 2019-09-01 at 4:18 AM UTC

   #2
   

   kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
   I don't think you'll die and not trying to be a dick but why was your fridge broken for that long? lol, seems like I have new material for my next episode of TALES FROM THE SHITHOLE: DUKES MAYO, you'll probably just get the runs really bad.
   
   lol but man I bought some whyte potatoes ahwile back and ate all of them but one and I had it hidden behind some stuff and didn't see it till the other day and it was fucking rotting and looked weird and was like "what the fucK?! when i picked it up and threw it"
   
   what kind of sandwhich was it? I make mayo and peanut butter with onion sammies.
   
   A couple years back when I had my seizure at the probation office I came home to my entire shower being gutted so they could retile it with tavertine bricks and mysteriously my power went out and my fridge was off for a couple days I was so out of it and super pissed off as I just bought a bunch of groceries and shit was going bad
3. 2019-09-01 at 4:23 AM UTC

   #3
   

   OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III African Astronaut
   it was broken a while back, it breaks periodically when i accidentally leave it cracked open and then ice forms on the back of the freezer which prevents the cold air from flowing into the fridge so the freezer works but the fridge doesn't til i unplug it and let it thaw out for 12-24 hours. i also try to eat at work most of the time so don't really use my fridge a whole lot tbh
4. 2019-09-01 at 4:27 AM UTC

   #4
   

   kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink

   Originally posted by OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III it was broken a while back, it breaks periodically when i accidentally leave it cracked open and then ice forms on the back of the freezer which prevents the cold air from flowing into the fridge so the freezer works but the fridge doesn't til i unplug it and let it thaw out for 12-24 hours. i also try to eat at work most of the time so don't really use my fridge a whole lot tbh

   
   ahh yeah I feel ya I mostly order food and eat at work, I've left it open a few times as well when I was krunk. My cat will literally turn on the gas stove if I'm gone way too long shit happens.
   
   When I was arrested six years ago, right before I was arrested my tubs faucet broke and it was spewing out hott water and we don't have onsight maintenance for two weeks *i was away for a month and a half* I was freaking out that my shits destroyed, my uncle luckily came into my place and said the walls looked like they were melting and my cieling fans were drooped over like dying flowers from the water. shit was gnarly
5. 2019-09-01 at 4:29 AM UTC

   #5
   frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 African Astronaut
   wR IR YOU NIGGGER FIGURTE
6. 2019-09-01 at 4:36 AM UTC

   #6
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
   Are you still alive?
7. 2019-09-01 at 4:50 AM UTC

   #7
   

   kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
   I only eat dukes mayo
   
   
   
   
8. 2019-09-01 at 5:01 AM UTC

   #8
   

   OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III African Astronaut

   Originally posted by -SpectraL Are you still alive?

   
   still alive, no symptoms yet.
9. 2019-09-01 at 5:03 AM UTC

   #9
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]

   Originally posted by OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III still alive, no symptoms yet.

   
   Ok, let us know if you die.
10. 2019-09-01 at 5:04 AM UTC

    #10
    

    OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III African Astronaut

    Originally posted by -SpectraL Ok, let us know if you die.

    
    i will keep you updated. if i wake up feeling like i'm on the verge of death in the middle of the night i will drag myself to the computer and let you all know that my death is imminent
11. 2019-09-01 at 5:10 AM UTC

    #11
    

    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]

    Originally posted by OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III i will keep you updated. if i wake up feeling like i'm on the verge of death in the middle of the night i will drag myself to the computer and let you all know that my death is imminent

    
    Excellent. I shall alert the masses.
12. 2019-09-01 at 5:12 AM UTC

    #12
    

    OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III African Astronaut

    Originally posted by -SpectraL Excellent. I shall alert the masses.

    
    Tell the people,
    Tell the people that arrive,
    Tell the people,
    Tell the people that arrive,
    We don't need to multiply
13. 2019-09-01 at 6:02 AM UTC

    #13
    

    POLECAT POLECAT is a motherfucking ferret [my presentably immunised ammonification]
    I would expect symptoms by now tbh
14. 2019-09-01 at 6:10 AM UTC

    #14
    

    Mud Hole Mania African Astronaut
    farting. burping up the taste of bad mayo would probably be the first symptoms with abdominal pain a bit.
    
    then dizziness and vomiting. drink Gatorade
15. 2019-09-01 at 6:12 AM UTC

    #15
    

    Mud Hole Mania African Astronaut

    Originally posted by Bill Krozby I only eat dukes mayo
    
    

    
    play it at 1.5 speed
    
    the voice stays the same pitch but it speeds up to the songs normal tempo (or just slightly faster)