FREE PASTA FOR LIFE FROM OLIVE GARDEN FOR $500!!!!!!!!!!! AT PM TODAY IN LESS THAN ONE HOUR HURRY LIMITED TIME!!!

1. 2019-08-15 at 5:21 PM UTC

   #1
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Olive Garden will be selling lifetime pasta passes for $500 starting at 2PM ET today for 30 minutes. The catch is that you have to agree to buy a $100 yearlong pass and opt in to potentially buy the lifetime pass should you happen to be one of the 50 first people to buy a pass. Otherwise you're stuck with the yearlong pass.
   
   
   Hurry the fuck up and get that Ziti, babe.
   
   https://lifehacker.com/olive-garden-is-selling-a-lifetime-pasta-pass-this-week-1837175839
2. 2019-08-15 at 5:22 PM UTC

   #2
   Jiggaboo_Johnson Black Hole
   Tomorrow's headline:
   
   Olive Garden file for chapter 11 bankruptcy.
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • aldra