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Niggas in Space > Half Baked > what will u do if ur car gets a flat tyre??
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what will u do if ur car gets a flat tyre??

  1. 2019-04-02 at 6:17 AM UTC
    #1
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    Well thanks for asking. It was a windy foggy morning so i did not pack my diaperbag like usual. I ended up sharting myself and getting rear-ended by a hummer. as it turns out, the FORD MOTOR COMPANY engineers decided my car did not need a full-size spare tire because in the 1970s chief engineer of cheapness J.P. Scroaten determined that only nigger faggots change their own tires. now I was driving a fully-loaded mid-size SUV full of piss and vinegar stewing in my own shit riding on a 'donut tire' . As you can imagine, traffic was quite dense ( those who drive Phoenix rush hour will understand this super well ) . Well before you know it i split my donut and careened off into a cactus patch. Being that I had notified FORD MOTOR COMPANY many times prior that a donut miniature tire was insufficient I was able to represent myself in small claims court and now FORD MOTOR COMPANY has to buy me a new mid-sized SUV every 3 years as part of the settlement I negotioneted.

    some times i think its kind of funny, sometimes i think its kind of sad but at the end of the day I knew i was right asserting myself to one of the big-3-auto-makers. truth be told i think i will stop claiming my free FORD MOTORE COMPANY vehicles as I plan to purchase a tesla next year.
  2. 2019-04-02 at 6:23 AM UTC
    #2
    Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
    I'd keep driving on it until I caused a serious accident, then I'd abandon the wreckage. Let the police waste their time on a manhunt. By the time they find me, I'll be long dead.
  3. 2019-04-02 at 6:28 AM UTC
    #3
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Zanick I'd keep driving on it until I caused a serious accident, then I'd abandon the wreckage. Let the police waste their time on a manhunt. By the time they find me, I'll be long dead.

    Meanwhile I'll have found you, desecrated your corpse, left a bunch of my DNA on your scene if know what mean, and be gone with the wind, leaving yet another dusty trail of hints and clues to distract those FUCKING FAGGOT COPS FUCK THE POLICE y'all caynt find us we going DOUBLE CRAY ya heard muh
  4. 2019-04-02 at 12:12 PM UTC
    #4
    tee hee hee Naturally Camouflaged [slangily complete this slumberer]
    Probably cry on the side of the road
  5. 2019-04-02 at 1:49 PM UTC
    #5
    Bologna Nacho African Astronaut
    I have roadside assistance and my son used it about 5 times and they sent me a letter saying I am using it too much
  6. 2019-04-02 at 1:54 PM UTC
    #6
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    Originally posted by Bologna Nacho I have roadside assistance and my son used it about 5 times and they sent me a letter saying I am using it too much

    So he got 5 phlat tyers??
  7. 2019-04-02 at 6:44 PM UTC
    #7
    Bologna Nacho African Astronaut
    Mostly pop a loc
  8. 2019-04-02 at 9:45 PM UTC
    #8
    Krow African Astronaut
    I forgot to losen the lugs before jacking it up and when I used my foot to pry one of the lugs lose, the car fell over and pushed the jack through the chassis and into the floor board of my vehicle .. now I have a hole where I can run a funnel with a hose through and use it as my own personal urinal when I'm stuck in traffic.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  9. 2019-04-02 at 10:08 PM UTC
    #9
    Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    I drove like 12 mile on the M3/M25 with a flat once after fill and running from the tesco garage in bedfont. At one point I watched the tire go rolling off on its own on the the hard shoulder. Still had 5 mile to do on just the rim. I was fucked if I was stopping on the motorway after that. Its all good fun tho.


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  10. 2019-04-02 at 10:10 PM UTC
    #10
    Krow African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Narc I drove like 12 mile on the M3/M25 with a flat once after fill and running from the tesco garage in bedfont. At one point I watched the tire go rolling off on its own on the the hard shoulder. Still had 5 mile to do on just the rim. I was fucked if I was stopping on the motorway after that. Its all good fun tho.


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    how much did a new rim cost you?
  11. 2019-04-02 at 11:47 PM UTC
    #11
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    Originally posted by Krow how much did a new rim cost you?

    he had two of his inverterbrates removed so he can give himself a rimjob on the motorway
  12. 2019-04-03 at 12:03 AM UTC
    #12
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Krow .. now I have a hole where I can run a funnel with a hose through and use it as my own personal urinal when I'm stuck in traffic.

    That's nothing. I have a hole in my floorboard so I can stick my legs through when I run out of gas.
  13. 2019-04-03 at 12:05 AM UTC
    #13
    Krow African Astronaut
    Originally posted by -SpectraL That's nothing. I have a hole in my floorboard so I can stick my legs through when I run out of gas.

    Yabba Dabba DOH!

  14. 2019-04-03 at 12:10 AM UTC
    #14
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    Change the tire?
  15. 2019-04-03 at 12:15 AM UTC
    #15
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Erekshun Change the tire?

    He didn't have a spare.
  16. 2019-04-03 at 12:15 AM UTC
    #16
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    But it was a question to me so..
  17. 2019-04-03 at 12:38 AM UTC
    #17
    Krow African Astronaut
    Ramp to the Island. car jack slipped :.(

    something tells me Erek knows this
  18. 2019-04-03 at 12:40 AM UTC
    #18
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    Originally posted by Krow Ramp to the Island. car jack slipped :.(

    something tells me Erek knows this

    what is the something that told you that?
  19. 2019-04-03 at 12:42 AM UTC
    #19
    Krow African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Erekshun what is the something that told you that?

    Some guy from Zaire

    I mean Republic of Congo
  20. 2019-04-03 at 8:53 AM UTC
    #20
    Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by Krow how much did a new rim cost you?

    Nothing actually. I got off the M25 at the wraysebury/staines junction and there is a scrap yard just up the road. I knew the guy that owned it and I got an old wheel off him.


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