Endtimes

1. 2019-03-31 at 7:50 AM UTC

   #1
   

   Krow African Astronaut
   I'm confused about the Bible's last book.
   
   the Apocalypse of Rev:
   
   If I am a good person and build a cellar dweller in the caves, am I to be buried by G-d as well?
   
   Are we not allowed to try and dig in and survive with survival foods and you last can of beans?
   
   Not being sarcastic.. but Bill Burr did make a good point.. there in your cave with your last can of beans.
   
   Or is G-d only going to punish the wicked who hide?. will all of us be seen as wicked?
2. 2019-03-31 at 10:42 AM UTC

   #2
   

   Technologist victim of incest
   Don’t worry about revelations. The world is ending tomorrow. Let me know how it goes.
3. 2019-03-31 at 11:11 AM UTC

   #3
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
   Good people won't feel the need to hide, but the wicked ones will.
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • Ghost
4. 2019-03-31 at 11:26 AM UTC

   #4
   

   Octavian motherfucker
   Good ones be gettin' murked during end times anyway you messing.
5. 2019-03-31 at 11:29 AM UTC

   #5
   Nil African Astronaut [the overexcited four-footed chanar]
   bible god is such an asshole
   
   bring back dionysus
6. 2019-03-31 at 11:31 AM UTC

   #6
   

   Ghost Black Hole
   I haven't read revelations since I was 14 but from what I remember the antichrist will trick you into believing they are the savior and following the goat headed demon lord so called "God" with the number on it's forehead will be the loss of your eternal soul
7. 2019-03-31 at 11:36 AM UTC

   #7
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
   What will happen is the aliens will uncloak their ships, and everyone will look up in astonishment and think they're the good guys here to save mankind, when it reality, they're the ones who want to have us destroy ourselves. There's a very good reason Satan is called the Father of the Lie.
8. 2019-03-31 at 11:36 AM UTC

   #8
   

   Technologist victim of incest
   If I remember correctly the end is not supposed to come until there is peace in the holy land.
9. 2019-03-31 at 11:37 AM UTC

   #9
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
   "Finally, they will say 'peace and security!', and then instant destruction will be upon them".
10. 2019-03-31 at 11:38 AM UTC

    #10
    

    Octavian motherfucker
    When Israel burns to the fucking ground.
11. 2019-03-31 at 2:54 PM UTC

    #11
    yabbadabbadindunuthin oplus is dead, long live oplus [my sedative well-conducted austrocedrus]

    Originally posted by Krow I'm confused about the Bible's last book.
    
    the Apocalypse of Rev:
    
    If I am a good person and build a cellar dweller in the caves, am I to be buried by G-d as well?
    
    Are we not allowed to try and dig in and survive with survival foods and you last can of beans?
    
    Not being sarcastic.. but Bill Burr did make a good point.. there in your cave with your last can of beans.
    
    Or is G-d only going to punish the wicked who hide?. will all of us be seen as wicked?

    
    
    Not surprisingly, there are competing theories about how that book is supposed to be interpreted. It was almost removed by Martin Luther for the very reason that it was so hyperbolic and difficult to understand. However, to answer your question specifically, there are 3 mainline Christian understandings about what happens during the rapture:
    
    1. All of the Christians are raptured before the plagues (meaning only the wicked are hiding).
    
    2. Some Christians are raptured before the plagues, but some come to Jesus (through martyrdom) while the antichrist rules the earth.
    
    3. Nobody is raptured until after everything is over.
    
    It's not worth worrying about since there is no rapture or magic spaceman that's going to punish you for being a spaceNigga, but if you really are worried about it, I would suggest picking up Wayne Grudem's book "Systematic Theology." It's a very easy read.
12. 2019-03-31 at 5:31 PM UTC

    #12
    

    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    There's really no rapture. The only "rapture" that happens is when the 144,000, a select group of human ambassadors God has chosen to sit in his heavenly government, get collected and installed over time. There's still some of them alive today, but they won't live on a paradise Earth like the rest of humans will, they'll live in heaven. For the rest of the people, it's simple: a day will come, Judgement Day, where everyone who ever lived will be judged for their deeds, and all the wicked (except for Satan himself) will be destroyed forever, whereas the good people will continue to live on and enter into God's original plan, before Adam and Eve sinned, which is a paradise Earth, where death and pain and misery and suffering will have become things of the past. This will happen in one day. Perhaps in seconds. Perhaps in the blink of an eye. There will come a time when no one will even remember any of those things. The former things will have passed away. For a thousand years people will live in paradisaical conditions, whereupon Satan will be let loose once again, to weed out the wicked. Free will. The heart condition can change. Even a perfect person like Adam willfully sinned. Satan will be loosed once again, and he will mislead many and lead many to their deaths.
13. 2019-03-31 at 5:48 PM UTC

    #13
    

    Octavian motherfucker
    I take solace knowing you're coming to hell with me speccy.
14. 2019-03-31 at 5:51 PM UTC

    #14
    

    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]

    Originally posted by Octavian I take solace knowing you're coming to hell with me speccy.

    
    There is no hell, son. The fake clergy, minions of Satan, fooled you. When God kills you, it's instant, irreversible, sudden, and final.
15. 2019-03-31 at 6:52 PM UTC

    #15
    

    Krow African Astronaut
    OK cool. I wont hide in my cellar dweller.. Im gonna live like someone from the Mederterranian region and build a cool tunnel house with openings and grow grapes for wine outside.. this way I don't have to pay house taxes, but basic farm taxes .. there will be no traditional house to assess value.
    
    
    loophole. the tempiture stays most constant underground (unless you live in permafrost regions which California doesn't have)
    
    now all I need is a 50 thousand to get a decent size forest property. I am told there isn't much sun in the mountains though.. it's an extra premium if you happen to be on the side of a hill or mountain with the sun covering most of it without other hills or mountains blocking it. Most pot farmers want that land.. it's becoming harder to find. but Forest land is cheaper than the valley or coastal