LPT: If you spend all your income within seconds of getting it, you can deduct all taxes paid

1. 2019-02-22 at 12:36 AM UTC

   #1
   

   gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
   Think about it, if you spend money as soon as you get it, it was never truly an asset in your possession.
   
   You really only held onto it for a matter of minutes.
   
   That's not income.
   
   When the ring bearer at a wedding is tasked with holding a several thousand dollar wedding ring for a few minutes before handing it over to the groom/bride, does he declare the ring as income?
   
   Of course not.
   
   Check, and mate, governments.
2. 2019-02-22 at 12:39 AM UTC

   #2
   Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
   My take home is $2000/week, what should I spend it on?
3. 2019-02-22 at 12:42 AM UTC

   #3
   

   gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]

   Originally posted by Erekshun My take home is $2000/week, what should I spend it on?

   
   I dunno... drugs?
   
   Gotta have drugs.
4. 2019-02-22 at 12:42 AM UTC

   #4
   

   gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
   Also, wtf do you do?
5. 2019-02-22 at 12:43 AM UTC

   #5
   

   gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
   Escort or drug dealer?
6. 2019-02-22 at 12:43 AM UTC

   #6
   Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
   No I don't. I guess I am fucked and pay taxes. Fuck man! I had hope!
7. 2019-02-22 at 12:45 AM UTC

   #7
   

   gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
   The boring (but noble) option is to give it all away to charity.
8. 2019-02-22 at 12:45 AM UTC

   #8
   

   gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
   Or you could do a mini-Brewster's Millions every pay day.
9. 2019-02-22 at 12:46 AM UTC

   #9
   

   ECAP Tuskegee Airman

   Originally posted by gadzooks Also, wtf do you do?

   
   He’s a Publishers Clearing House winner
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • A College Professor
10. 2019-02-22 at 12:46 AM UTC

    #10
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    Or not.
11. 2019-02-22 at 12:48 AM UTC

    #11
    

    ECAP Tuskegee Airman
    I seen the big check my dude
12. 2019-02-22 at 12:50 AM UTC

    #12
    

    OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III African Astronaut
    even better, just have any incoming funds or assets immediately forwarded to me for safekeeping. that way you don't have to pay taxes on them and you also have the additional security of being able to rest easy knowing i am guarding your valuables
13. 2019-02-22 at 12:51 AM UTC

    #13
    

    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    I want to just walk into a bank with a big huge check for like... $5.47.
    
    Bonus points if the bank is packed that day and I get to just obnoxiously knock people over with it while I budge to the front of the line.
14. 2019-02-22 at 12:51 AM UTC

    #14
    

    POLECAT POLECAT is a motherfucking ferret [my presentably immunised ammonification]

    Originally posted by Erekshun My take home is $2000/week, what should I spend it on?

    
    for $500 a week you can sponsor an aging hillbilly actually 2 aging hillbilly's for the price of one,, pretty sure we could be a writoff
15. 2019-02-22 at 12:54 AM UTC

    #15
    

    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]

    Originally posted by POLECAT for $500 a week you can sponsor an aging hillbilly actually 2 aging hillbilly's for the price of one,, pretty sure we could be a writoff

    
    You need to put together one of those super emotional commercials for your cause, with slowly panning sequences showing your sad faces, interspersed with empty cupboards and shivering by an unlit fire, all set to Sarah McLachlan playing in the background.
16. 2019-02-22 at 12:59 AM UTC

    #16
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged

    Originally posted by POLECAT for $500 a week you can sponsor an aging hillbilly actually 2 aging hillbilly's for the price of one,, pretty sure we could be a writoff

    
    Get Lala to SMD once a week and we may have a deal. Details need to be worked out.
17. 2019-02-22 at 1:04 AM UTC

    #17
    

    Rizzo in a box African Astronaut [the rapidly lightproof ovariectomy]
    cash isn't an asset, its a debt
18. 2019-02-22 at 1:14 AM UTC

    #18
    

    Soyboy V: A Cat-Girl/Boy Under Every Bed African Astronaut [my no haunted nonbeing]

    Originally posted by Rizzo in a box cash isn't an asset, its a debt

    
    Double entry accounting, Assets and Expenses go on one side, Liabilities and Income on the other.
    
    Understanding why that is will make you way smarter in the ways of business.
19. 2019-02-22 at 1:20 AM UTC

    #19
    

    Rizzo in a box African Astronaut [the rapidly lightproof ovariectomy]
    everything is a liability
20. 2019-02-22 at 1:02 PM UTC

    #20
    Jiggaboo_Johnson Black Hole

    Originally posted by gadzooks Think about it, if you spend money as soon as you get it, it was never truly an asset in your possession.

    
    That's not why you are taxed though.
    
    You're taxed on Earnings and then the products and services you buy carry a tax load. The tax burden is there before you even get it.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

    • Needledick Needledick Needledick