2019-02-19 at 5:14 PM UTC
Did you do any good deeds yesterday? I did 2, here they are.
Good deed #1.
Right after leaving work, it was a beautiful sunny afternoon, low 70s, window rolled down, shades on...sitting at traffic light and a homeless woman came over and said "Sir could you spare some change"...well as you may expect I normally tell them to fuck off but its fairly rare to see a woman doing this and a woman that under better circumstances I might have allowed to suck my willy...so I said "I don't have any paper money but I've got a bunch of change here" She said "Anything helps sir".
I gave her about $2.50 or so in change, her hand brushed mine as she took it...I thought "Damn now I can't put my hand in my mouth or anything till I get home and wash it really well" I was then somewhat paranoid as it's a long drive and I knew I'd at some point want to put my hand up to my face/mouth so I had to remain conscious of not doing that.
Good deed #2.
I was on the Beltway 8 about 2/3rds of the way home and the SUV in front of my had the gas cap loose and dangling...as you may or may not know having your gas cap off your car is a fire risk, gasoline fumes can and do explode, I got right behind the car and flashed my lights, I saw the woman looking her mirror obviously wondering why I was flashing her...the opportunity arose for me to get beside her, It's then I noted it was two old ladies (late 50s early 60s)...I honked and they looked at me scared...I honked again and motioned for them to roll the window down...they sped up...I sped up and again motioned them...finally the passenger rolled her window down (This was all at 80mph btw)...
I shouted "your gas cap is off" the two ladies nodded and mouthed/said "oh! thanks" and had a relieved look on their faces like they where expecting me to climb out of my car window and jump across to theirs to rape them at 80mph.
I continued on watching my rear view mirror to see if they were going to pull over to take care of it, naturally they didn't and just kept going, I then started thinking about how ungrateful they were that I'd just saved their lives and they were choosing to throw their lives away anyway in a fireball of gas fumes.
2019-02-19 at 5:19 PM UTC
tee hee hee
Naturally Camouflaged
[slangily complete this slumberer]
You're a true hero pooh bear! 😍😍
2019-02-19 at 5:21 PM UTC
So, what you are saying is that you can't even any longer get the attention (much less a good throating) from 60 year old women.
Time is so cruel, isn't it, Boo?
2019-02-19 at 5:25 PM UTC
Grylls
Cum Looking Faggot
[abrade this vocal tread-softly]
All i learned from this thread is you seem to attract poor/homeless and/or retarded women
2019-02-19 at 5:29 PM UTC
You're not supposed to learn anything, you're supposed to share your good deeds.
2019-02-19 at 5:32 PM UTC
You're supposed to share your seed.
2019-02-19 at 5:35 PM UTC
Your "Whipping the Buffalo", "Spanking the Monkey", Flogging the Dolphin"...
2019-02-19 at 6:02 PM UTC
I saw a garbage can in the middle of the street when I took my dog for a walk. I tried to superkick it back into the yard, but it was full of trash so I pulled it upright & dragged it to the curb.
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2019-02-19 at 6:07 PM UTC
Originally posted by DontTellEm
I saw a garbage can in the middle of the street when I took my dog for a walk. I tried to superkick it back into the yard, but it was full of trash so I pulled it upright & dragged it to the curb.
VERY thoughtful and thank you for posting on Topic. I'm sure you're neighbor would have appreciated you doing that, and the community as a whole.
Had I lived in your community and witnessed that I'd have invited you and your puppy in for tea and buttered scones.
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2019-02-19 at 6:23 PM UTC
Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson
VERY thoughtful and thank you for posting on Topic. I'm sure you're neighbor would have appreciated you doing that, and the community as a whole.
Had I lived in your community and witnessed that I'd have invited you and your puppy in for tea and buttered scones.
Ya, I felt pretty good about it. I took my time wrestling it to the curb, in hopes that someone would see my contribution.
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2019-02-19 at 6:26 PM UTC
Is there a doctor in the house? One that can fix broken arms of Boo and DTE from patting themselves on their backs?
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
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