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2016-11-17 at 9:15 PM UTC
Originally posted by Sophie Narcissistic psychopathic tendencies run in the family is what occurred.
Post last edited by Sophie at 2016-11-17T20:51:15.284080+00:00
Ooh, juicy. Tell me more. No need to be shy, we're all effectively anon here, a lack of physical proximity and IRL consequences and all. -
2016-11-17 at 9:36 PM UTC
Originally posted by Malice Ooh, juicy. Tell me more. No need to be shy, we're all effectively anon here, a lack of physical proximity and IRL consequences and all.
Why don't you tell me your deepest most inner emotional experiences as a child and i'll tell you mine. -
2016-11-17 at 9:45 PM UTCBut...I genuinely don't have any. See, the thing is, despite the memory capacity I've displayed, I really don't place any value on my past, memories of my life. They're mere shadows of past experience, and insignificant.
I know this is in large part due to an unbelievable lack of social experience, the level of isolation and detachment I've enacte, which I don't consider negatively. If there's any value in such things, it's how they develop you as a person, not fleeting emotions. I'd prefer to bypass such things and head straight to the source. There's also the unemotional, robotic, Asperger's aspect. My capacity for negative emotions is augmented, and positive ones greatly diminished.
It really is odd. I've stated something similar before about having no memory of ever having experienced notable incidences of many emotions. If you asked me to name a favorite memory, a time when I strongly felt ___ I genuinely couldn't tell you, and I'm fine with that, it makes no difference to me. I don't see humanity, standard aspects of human constitutions, as something positive, so I purposefully cultivate inhumanity, to surpass natural biological desires, which, of course, are the basis of psychological predispositions, and supercede genetic human nature.
Come now, don't be shy. I'm actually showing interest in your life, curiosity about what these major events are and how they may have molded you. It really isn't that significant, in a way, I'm not salivating at the opportunity for psychoanalysis, emotional manipulation, or acquiring data to utilize in the future for self-glorification ad sadistic ends. No, really, I'm not. Stop looking at me like that, I can at least be benign, if not helpful without expecting anything in return. -
2016-11-17 at 11:06 PM UTC
Originally posted by Malice But…I genuinely don't have any. See, the thing is, despite the memory capacity I've displayed, I really don't place any value on my past, memories of my life. They're mere shadows of past experience, and insignificant.
I know this is in large part due to an unbelievable lack of social experience, the level of isolation and detachment I've enacte, which I don't consider negatively. If there's any value in such things, it's how they develop you as a person, not fleeting emotions. I'd prefer to bypass such things and head straight to the source. There's also the unemotional, robotic, Asperger's aspect. My capacity for negative emotions is augmented, and positive ones greatly diminished.
It really is odd. I've stated something similar before about having no memory of ever having experienced notable incidences of many emotions. If you asked me to name a favorite memory, a time when I strongly felt ___ I genuinely couldn't tell you, and I'm fine with that, it makes no difference to me. I don't see humanity, standard aspects of human constitutions, as something positive, so I purposefully cultivate inhumanity, to surpass natural biological desires, which, of course, are the basis of psychological predispositions, and supercede genetic human nature.
Come now, don't be shy. I'm actually showing interest in your life, curiosity about what these major events are and how they may have molded you. It really isn't that significant, in a way, I'm not salivating at the opportunity for psychoanalysis, emotional manipulation, or acquiring data to utilize in the future for self-glorification ad sadistic ends. No, really, I'm not. Stop looking at me like that, I can at least be benign, if not helpful without expecting anything in return.
Fine i will give you one memory. I need to explain something first though. Do you know how some people can be really charismatic? Their body language seems to reflect the emotion of their words?
Anyway, it may sound silly to anyone reading it but when i was about 8 years old, i'd done something trivial, that i wasn't supposed to do or whatever. And my father called me over to scold me, remember what i said about charisma? Well my dad could be a scary guy, and he would go off on the silliest things and this time he was so over the top enraged i genuinely feared for my life. And as i stood there frozen in fear hearing my father berate me and scream profanities from the top of his lungs the weirdest thing happened. You know the voice in your head? You know, your thoughts. At that moment it was like the voice in my head took on a life of it's own, and in my thoughts some version of me was yelling back in defense. It was like i was a witness to my father and my conscious having a shouting match. It was the weirdest thing.
It was probably helpful though, because at least i didn't turn out 100% insane, only a little. Also, you reap what you sow, and after years of abuse by my father i was like nope. and then i beat him to within an inch of his life.
True story, remember on Zoklet? I had to go to court and everything.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2016-11-17 at 11:10 PM UTC>2017
still controling ur own thoughtsz
lomao
