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Fuck the next french fries you eat.
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2018-12-02 at 4:05 PM UTC
Originally posted by ohfralala One time I got arrested for underage drinking. I had been pounding Zimas with jolly ranchers dropped in the bottom.
That's pretty , ohfralala. I was arrested once, also for underage drinking, for taking a SINGLE SHOT of knock-off Everclear called DIESEL and it was 2 hours before I ever blew. In fact...I think I shared this story before..
Originally posted by Grimace A friend of mine was driving me home after I spent a few hours at his house and had ONE shot of Everclear. Lo and behold, as we pulled onto my street, there were the cops, arresting one of my neighbors (lol). My dumbass friend stops the car anyway so it's too late to try and get him to keep going. The cops turned around and everything. I was all, "Fucking dumbass! Jesus Christ! I hope you have bail money. I am going to jail tonight!" all he said was "Sorry, dude" in a retarded sort of way, but I guess he was worried about his potential DUI.
Anyway, I get out of the car and start walking the 500ft from the bottom of the road to my house, which forced me to walk right past the flashing blue and red light arrest scene going on. I just tried to act like it was none of my fucking business, which it wasn't. Those faggot cops let me get 1/2 way up the street before they called me out by my NAME. "GRIMACE! Come here for a second."
"God damnit.", I thought to myself. "Do I fucking run? Do I make them earn their check? One of them is fat. I can definitely outrun him. The other one seems fit, he might get me. Either way, warrant will be issued. Fuck, fuck, FUCK!"
So I turn around and walk back down to the arrest scene of my neighbor.
"You been drinking tonight?", the fat one asks.
"No.", I say.
"Don't lie to me. I can smell it on you.", he says. This fucking infuriated me, as there was no possible way he could have SMELLED the ONE SHOT of Everclear I took 2 hours prior when I was walking up the street 20ft from him.
"No you don't. I haven't been drinking.", I say defiantly.
"We're going to give you a breathalyzer and find out.", he says.
"No you're not.", I say.
"We're not? Are you refusing the breathalyzer? If you're not guilty, there is nothing to worry about.", he said with a smirk on his face. The tone in his voice and the smirk on his face sent me into a silent rage.
"You piece of fucking shit fatass cop", I thought to myself as he stared at me with that smirk on his face.
"Yeah, you're probably drunk. We know how you GRIMACE'S are.", the cop said while laughing to his buddy. This was it.
"Yeah? FUCK YOU, bitch!", I shouted and SPIT on his chest, staining his faggot uniform with my spit wad.
He looked down at it, then looked at me, and I could see the RAGE come over him as he and his partner tackled me and did some sort of backwoods hog tie maneuver as I kicked and thrashed to get me in the back of the car. The whole time, I am screaming, "FUCK YOU, FAGGOT!" as I thrash and try to break free.
For some reason, and I don't know to this day why, the cop didn't charge me with spitting on him. All I was charged with was disorderly conduct, which was dropped to time served since I spent a week in jail over it.
Still. That was the dumbest reason I was ever arrested, both on my part for spitting on the faggot fucker and on their part for fucking with me when I was just walking past to go home. I guess they figured "two for one!" while they were there arresting my neighbor.
I fucking hate cops. Most of them, anyway. -
2018-12-02 at 4:08 PM UTCFRENCH FRIES!!!!!!! Where?!!!! I want some!!!! 🤤😬
off topic: hiya Tech! -
2018-12-02 at 4:09 PM UTCwhat the fuck is zimas? isn't that a beach by malibu?
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2018-12-02 at 4:11 PM UTCI always thought it was a wine cooler. lol
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2018-12-02 at 4:12 PM UTCas a wino, I declare holy jihad on anyone that drinks wine out of a plastic container.
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2018-12-02 at 4:16 PM UTC
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2018-12-02 at 4:17 PM UTCwe never had them here, I always assumed they were some kind of soft drink
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2018-12-02 at 4:18 PM UTCSmirnoff is who, I think, made them... Grim. They're kinda a weird limy kinda taste, if I remember correctly. I never really cared for the taste of them... so, It's been in forever ago, that I've had one.
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2018-12-02 at 4:21 PM UTC
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2018-12-02 at 4:22 PM UTCyeah whatever that's gay
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2018-12-02 at 4:29 PM UTCHello Miss Purdy🥰
I remember that mostly yuppies with sweaters tied around their neck drank Zimas. But I know that’s not Grim, so he’s one of the exceptions to the rule.
Then I saw my son drinking Zimas and I thought they were longggg gone. -
2018-12-02 at 4:30 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grimace He looked down at it, then looked at me, and I could see the RAGE come over him as he and his partner tackled me and did some sort of backwoods hog tie maneuver as I kicked and thrashed to get me in the back of the car. The whole time, I am screaming, "FUCK YOU, FAGGOT!" as I thrash and try to break free.
Lmao
Also, KNOCK-OFF Everclear is just as bad as Zimas with jolly ranchers. That’s some basic white boy shit so don’t judge me for my basic white girl shit. Obviously we were both trashy teenagers.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-12-02 at 4:33 PM UTCRizzio!! what is it... with all the ghay chit. You try'n ta 'come out' and tell us something? 😜
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2018-12-02 at 4:33 PM UTC
Originally posted by ohfralala Lmao
Also, KNOCK-OFF Everclear is just as bad as Zimas with jolly ranchers. That’s some basic white boy shit so don’t judge me for my basic white girl shit. Obviously we were both trashy teenagers.
peppermint extract is knock off everclear, and it tastes better too. -
2018-12-02 at 4:34 PM UTC
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2018-12-02 at 4:38 PM UTCHey, Lala.... how is you? Have you put your 'ugly' X mas sweater on, yet? I have....
I've been so nice and UGLY warm these last few days! I, so, love the festiveness of the Holidays! -
2018-12-02 at 4:41 PM UTC
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2018-12-02 at 4:41 PM UTCnothing i despise more than women having chit chat on MY FUCKING INTERNET
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2018-12-02 at 4:44 PM UTC^ shhhhhhhhht. *puts finger to lips
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2018-12-02 at 4:45 PM UTCfucking battery and assault, your punk ass is going to jail forever
