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Do you think Jesues ever wacked off?

  1. #21
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Originally posted by mmQ For the record, I didn't bump it. Didn't even know it was old til you mentioned it.

    Cuposhit/Shitluigi did it. He's SO crazy!
  2. #22
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Sophie This fiction is serious business though, i'm a fan of the series. The third installment kind of sucked though. Also;

    Clearly Matthew was off his rocker, the holy spirit is some potent shit, because he is equating sins in thought to sins in action. Bonus points for the passage though. Adultery is a sin 100%, but looking at a woman is not adultery. Perhaps Matthew is projecting a bit here.

    Furthermore;
    In your understanding of the meaning of sin only if one is sinless can one carry the burden of sin? That doesn't make sense, or is it a special rule because it's Jesus? Also, Jesus is clearly cheating because he is literally God according to how the holy trinity works.

    So there's seem to be confusion among us as to what means what throughout the Bible, what is to be taken literally and what figuratively, what certain passages mean, and how Jesus' sacrifice even worked, which is weird since God is not the author of confusion.


    1 Corinthians 14:33 King James Version (KJV)
    33 For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.

    He wrote a pretty confusing book to include that verse in there. I sorta think we're being trolled.
  3. #23
    cupocheer Space Nigga [unwillingly condescend the dp]
    OP, you must be a honkey.

    Jesus Christ is a brown man.

    Brown men don't wack off, fool. Women don't permit it. LMRAO
  4. #24
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by mmQ So there's seem to be confusion among us as to what means what throughout the Bible, what is to be taken literally and what figuratively, what certain passages mean, and how Jesus' sacrifice even worked, which is weird since God is not the author of confusion.


    1 Corinthians 14:33 King James Version (KJV)
    33 For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.

    He wrote a pretty confusing book to include that verse in there. I sorta think we're being trolled.

    Only Muslims believe God wrote the holy books himself, personally. As far as i thought Christians understand the bible was written by those who got divine inspiration through the holy spirit, that still doesn't make them perfect, they are after all just humans, so it's dope in a way, because you can allow for little inconsistencies and weird things like that because it is precisely not the literal word of God.
  5. #25
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Originally posted by mmQ So there's seem to be confusion among us as to what means what throughout the Bible, what is to be taken literally and what figuratively, what certain passages mean, and how Jesus' sacrifice even worked, which is weird since God is not the author of confusion.


    1 Corinthians 14:33 King James Version (KJV)
    33 For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.

    He wrote a pretty confusing book to include that verse in there. I sorta think we're being trolled.
    Wrenth a very smarth boy.
    What a special boy Indeedth.
  6. #26
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Sophie Only Muslims believe God wrote the holy books himself, personally. As far as i thought Christians understand the bible was written by those who got divine inspiration through the holy spirit, that still doesn't make them perfect, they are after all just humans, so it's dope in a way, because you can allow for little inconsistencies and weird things like that because it is precisely not the literal word of God.

    But, but..

    2 Peter 1:19-21 New International Version (NIV)
    19 We also have the prophetic message as something completely reliable, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts. 20 Above all, you must understand that no prophecy of Scripture came about by the prophet’s own interpretation of things. 21 For prophecy never had its origin in the human will, but prophets, though human, spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.
  7. #27
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Muslims don't believe that God wrote the holy books. The Quran was partially dictated to Muhammad by the angel Gabriel is what they believe.
  8. #28
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    I have no idea why garbage people would be trying to analyze Holy word. It's to be Felt, not dissected like a couple brokeback mountain men. ☺️
  9. #29
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Know what I'm saying? 🤗

    Church ISN'T always found under a steeple.
  10. #30
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by DontTellEm Know what I'm saying? 🤗

    Eek eek ook ook gnome saying?

    No.
  11. #31
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Where 2 or more are gathered, that is church. That also has nothing to do with topic of conversation.
  12. #32
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by mmQ But, but..

    2 Peter 1:19-21 New International Version (NIV)
    19 We also have the prophetic message as something completely reliable, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts. 20 Above all, you must understand that no prophecy of Scripture came about by the prophet’s own interpretation of things. 21 For prophecy never had its origin in the human will, but prophets, though human, spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.

    So basically prophecy of scripture can only come true because god wills it and the second bolded part doesn't say the bible is God's literal word. It just speaks with regards to prophecy again.

    Prophecy of scripture also doesn't mean scripture itself, rather it tells us that what prophetic words may reside in scripture were not of man's making. But granted to the prophet as though acting as God's scribe through the holy spirit.
  13. #33
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    I like theology.
  14. #34
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Originally posted by DontTellEm I have no idea why garbage people would be trying to analyze Holy word. It's to be Felt, not dissected like a couple brokeback mountain men. ☺️

    Life hurts.
  15. #35
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Sophie So basically prophecy of scripture can only come true because god wills it and the second bolded part doesn't say the bible is God's literal word. It just speaks with regards to prophecy again.

    Prophecy of scripture also doesn't mean scripture itself, rather it tells us that what prophetic words may reside in scripture were not of man's making. But granted to the prophet as though acting as God's scribe through the holy spirit.

    Prophecy of scripture HAS to come to true because it's God will; technically it's not even prophecy since it's already going to take place for sure. Well I guess that's prophecy.. But regardless of humans having visions and speaking prophetically, yes, according to the Bible it's really just God speaking through them in order to let them know HOW ITS GONNA BE. WHAT IT IS WHAT IT DO NIGGA, is what God's saying.

    As far I understand it, at the end of the day, whether it's a literal prophetic vision within the bible, or just "man's writings" within the bible, it is still all inspired by and essentially written though the direction of God, hence the common reference to the Bible as 'The Word of God.'

    Just bringing me back to my other point about how almost every verse in the bible can be up for interpretation and many of them are seen in completely different ways, whether it's by different Christian denominations or just as commonly by different people within the same sect or denomination. I don't know if there's a way to look at and interpret the bible objectively, so I dont know why they decided to include a verse about how God doesn't bring forth confusion.
  16. #36
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Lol.
    I had an epiphany on how it's gonna be..
    & I'm how we do it.

    So ya.

    Gnome I'm saying Playboy.
  17. #37
    cupocheer Space Nigga [unwillingly condescend the dp]
    Originally posted by mmQ Where 2 or more are gathered, that is church. That also has nothing to do with topic of conversation.

    Where two or more are gathered in His name there He shall be also.
  18. #38
    Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
    I think the better question would be what reason we could possibly have to presume that he didn't.
  19. #39
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Zanick I think the better question would be what reason we could possibly have to presume that he didn't.

    Post 13 for starters.
  20. #40
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by mmQ Prophecy of scripture HAS to come to true because it's God will; technically it's not even prophecy since it's already going to take place for sure. Well I guess that's prophecy.. But regardless of humans having visions and speaking prophetically, yes, according to the Bible it's really just God speaking through them in order to let them know HOW ITS GONNA BE. WHAT IT IS WHAT IT DO NIGGA, is what God's saying.

    As far I understand it, at the end of the day, whether it's a literal prophetic vision within the bible, or just "man's writings" within the bible, it is still all inspired by and essentially written though the direction of God, hence the common reference to the Bible as 'The Word of God.'

    Just bringing me back to my other point about how almost every verse in the bible can be up for interpretation and many of them are seen in completely different ways, whether it's by different Christian denominations or just as commonly by different people within the same sect or denomination. I don't know if there's a way to look at and interpret the bible objectively, so I dont know why they decided to include a verse about how God doesn't bring forth confusion.

    To play God's advocate for a second. God may not bring forth confusion, but isn't it the fault of us humans then for misinterpreting the bible? Even if the bible is God's literal word, us not understanding it isn't God's fault.
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