2018-04-18 at 2:57 AM UTC
I am very scared. I am delusional for sure because I noticed for a second what I am doing and it isn't right but I feel it is. Rape is bad. I just don't know what to do anymore. I can't say suicide because then I am wearing paper clothes again locked in the psych ward. I need a doctor. One who can help get me on pills but I don't have the time or care when I do. My life is in shambles. Kinkou left me and I cant stop masturbating to amputee porn. I am crying a lot but only on the inside because I am no pussy. I think my eyes are going bad. Lanny don't ban me buddy. I apologize for my behavior. I am goino to take drugs tomorrow to hopefully prevent this. I feel like I'm falling apart. My life is not what I want. I just wanna die...
But I tell myself wait until tomorrow and if you still wanna die then kill myself.
Well every tomorrow I wake up feeling better but I think it's just my bipolar fucking with me.
I don't like this anymore.
Only advice I can give is dont take acid.
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