Road Trip, Rent a SUV hybrid if possible. you can crash more comfortably in it. by several cases of bottle water and a small thing of ivory bodywash. by some comforters (thick blankets) and pillows. get some Tylenol nighttime to help you sleep.
Fly into San Diego (not LA) and beach and zoo then move north (I guess I-101 or 5 or whatever highway it is) go into LA. stop for fish Tacos in one of the boardwalk beach towns. move on north.. if night comes, drive into Santa Barbara.. take the Night Time, drink water. Pull over in a nice neighborhood and crash as many hours you can get. set alarm on phone for 15 minutes before sunrise, drop some ivory soap into a waterbottle.. shake it. wash face, and hair.. and wipe off your dank spots, bughole and pits. move on north. Santa Barbara it not on the budget level. But there is a Big town built by some crazy Danish people. an Entire Danish town. cant think of the name.. but go there. get a danish or something (Oh yeah.. slowvange)
You can go to Big Sur, but it's not just right off the highway, I believe you have to travel west some miles.. so I would go north
Pass Carmel, go to Monterey (you will probably be there by noon or 11am at this point) and park near the Cannery (Downtown near the water) and get some decent clam chowder and a brew. and then go check out the Aquarium for a few hours. it's pretty cool.
Drive north to Santa Cruz (about an hour north) If you're coming after march, the weekends might be open. it has a Boardwalk with a Theme park and rides, a giant arcade and some places to get carnaval food.
Move north and do one of two things.
Go North on PCH H-1 and drive to Half Moon Bay and getting a hotel room if you can find one (to take a proper shower) or take Highway 17 to San Jose and get a better room for the same price and shower.
San Jose you can opt to take 280 and check out the beautiful scenery or take 101 and stop off at Stanford Univercity if you want. not really worth stopping off at but it has a pretty campus
Go north on 101 or 280 to San Francisco.. Park, check out the Mission District and get something to eat. Or to to the Hayes District and get some bites. Or the stupid Tourist shit in the Haight District or Wharf. or go to the Castro.. they got some great restaurants there too or little cafe
You can drive North over the Golden Gate Bridge or Take the Oakland Bay Bridge and check out the trendy west oakland's Telegraph area, find a store that sells you the pot you so wish to have. Get a buzz, (Most stores are downtown off of Broadway or Webster and 7th) find one of the many Korean Joints to eat at, lots of Korean BBQ places or coffe shops, pizza places, Italian whatever. My guess is you're gonna cross the Golden Gate Bridge. Oakland has legal pot stores now. and you can also go to Berkeley and check out Telegraph in Berkeley as well. From Berkeley Telegraph to bancroft and drive down hill to Shattuck, turn right, pass over University.. keep going straight, drive though a tunnel you're now on Salano Ave .. cool little village like neighborhood with small unique stores and restaurants. drive down hill to San Pablo Avenue, turn left which is south/east.. and turn right on Gilman. drive a few blocks to the 900 block, look on the left side at 924 Gilman.. famous Punk Rock Club .. Dead Kennedy's Lead Singer and apparently former totse member Jello B. was jumped by a gang of mosh pitters. Take some selfies, post them
Now leave and drive down Gilman until you hit the freeway.. this is the funnest intersection in Northern California. There should be a big fucking Traffic Circle but there isn't one. the city won't pay for it because they wont. try figuring out how to get on the highway without getting rammed into by the many cars dodging one another. or getting "Bum Rush" by the many homeless people. It's pretty fucked up and sad, but that's California.
Go under the highway and turn left (or go straight, park and play some horses at the famous Golden Gate fields) and stay in the right lanes and head back to San Francisco .. toll is 4-6 bucks depending on the time of day or for shits and giggles blow through the far right bus lane and see if the cops come after you.. probably not a good thing.. actually don't do that.
Stay on the highway, second lane from the far right.. look for Golden Gate Bridge. now.. it's not easy to find.. you will exist off the freeway.. it ends.. and pay attention to the signs directing you to the bridge or keep your GPS on because we live in the future and shit.
cross it.. go north into Sonoma.. find Napa County or stay in Sonoma and do the wino thing. but they don't like people smoking pot in their county it seems.. they're more strict about it. so keep your weed in your rental car. Get your wino drink on. leave, sober up in your suv, wake & bake (as long as you're parked in the Winery Lot)
Now, you can stay on 101 and head north into Oregon and check out the Oregon coast once you cross the stateline. Also stop off in Eureka, cool little hippy town. Its in California before Oregon. Also check out Mt Shasta.
Go north to Washington, check out whatever.. I'm not too familure with it.
Or from Napa, head east and find Highway I-80 and stay on I-80.. go to Reno instead of Vegas. or even Tahoe. then get back on I-80.. past reno, look for the road to Black Rock Dessert.. camp out in your SUV somewhere. Pyramid Lake maybe. then go back to I-80, east.. check out Salt Lake City, Convert to Mormonism. Move on. I think Colorado is next, or north to Wyoming. go to Wyoming. yellowstone (by the way, you could of went to Yosemite but it was east of San Francisco. gone that way to Tahoe after Yosemite and back to I-80
anyways Yellowstone, I never been. but I hear its cool.
Old Faithful is there.
keep traveling East.. find your way back to I-80 go to Chicago. Don't get Shot
Find the road to NYC. don't get caught with your weed outside of California BTW.. smoke it all before you leave. some states are pretty strict.
go to NYC. Don't get Mugged. Check out the Night Club scene or take in a Broadway show. or Off Broadway. drive into the Hamstens . be the next Ted Kennedy, drive into the bay. but don't have anyone with you like he did.
tell the car company you lost your car while car washing it.
Hitchhike to Coney Island Don't get Mugged
Hitchhike to JFK fly home.
