-HOW TO DECODE FEMALE BEHAVIOR, PASS A WOMAN'S TESTS, AND ATTRACT WOMEN THROUGH AUTHENTICITY
By the venerable Bruce Bryans.
I'm back to book-learning and I've taken quite an interested in expanding my horizons as I am both a feminist and a toxic-betamale chauvinist-pig.
Ch. 1
"As he fails her tests, she begins to withhold her respect, support, and physical affection from him"
"A major factor that causes some relationships to self-destruct for no apparent reason is because of a miscommunication; where a woman tests her man hoping that he'll man up and assert himself but instead he does the complete opposite and supplicates to her demands. The problem isn't that he's incapable of standing up for himself and standing up to her; the problem is a miscommunication due to a lack of understanding"
"Women test men because they seek both love and leadership from them. ... any sort of relationship with a woman ... is going to be filled with tests, teasing, conflicts, and challenges."
"If you want to remain steadfast not only as you relate with women but in other areas of your life, you must learn to embrace rejection and enjoy conflict."
Ch. 2: Why Women Test Men
"... testing men is a survival mechanism used for gaining vital information about a man's character. Because a woman craves security and a weak man poses great risk to the well-being of both her and her offspring, she's going to use various techniques, to ensure the man she's interested or invested in can be counted on now and in the future."
"Most women don't know that they're doing it and the ones who do realize what's going on only recognize ... AFTER ... Just as it requires a ton of self-control for a man to not stare at a half-naked woman in his field of vision, so it is with this habit of testing for women."
"And once she finds a man who 'gets it' she's going to continue to test him until the relationship ends or he kicks the bucket."
"A woman can't help but feel a sense of loss when you fail, especially if she's romantically interested or invested in you. Failure, my friend, is not an option if you want the love, respect, support, and sexual interest of a good woman. She cannot help how shes wired, and she's wired to test men in order to survive."
Ch. 3 - How Women Test Men
-How Women Test Men-
Congruence test: " ... it's a test to determine whether or not a man is, at his core, congruent with what he's presenting to her"
Compliance test: "Another side of the congruence test coin is the compliance test. ... In her mind she's trying to assess 'How much is he willing to please me?' or 'How much can I get away with before he tells me No' "
"Men who desire a woman's approval above all else struggle the most with compliance type tests. Such men display neediness that women do not find attractive. ... a woman will use compliance tests to get her way or to coerce a man into asserting his boundaries with her."
...
"So while looking at your wife naked and groping her tight little body gives you the sexual jolt you need, experiencing a first-hand display of your assertiveness gives her what she needs."
"In any event, don't worry about it. If she's testing you, she desires you. So instead of waiting for her to start poking just give her a show. Preemptive need meeting in this area will decrease her need to test you."
-DECIPHERING A WOMAN'S TEST IN A REQUEST-
"Living in fear of being manipulated will make you paranoid. It keeps you on the defensive and makes it ridiculously difficult for you to enjoy a loving relationship with any woman. So instead of thinking that every time she asks you to do something she's testing you, it's better to cue in on your woman's tone and the underlying motive she has when she makes a request."
-Responding based on tone and motive
Reasonable request made in a resonable tone
"Is not a test, and therefore should not be treated like one. A sensible request in a grateful tone: comply with it"
Reasonable request made in an unresonable tone
"Can be classified as a true congruence test because of the way a woman approaches you. Her request is sincere and necessary but her tone is disrespectful. DO NOT COMPLY WITH NAGGING OR ANY KIND OF CANTANKEROUS BEHAVIOR. Firmly tell her that you'll address her needs when she changes her tone to a more reasonable one."
Unreasonable request made in a resonable tone
"These are compliance tests. Whatever she's asking for seems so unreasonable, but she asks in such a pleasant attractive tone to appease your ego. It's usually something that would cost you so much of your time, money, standards, etc, that it makes you undeniably uncomfortable. WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT COMPLY. SHE'S BEING MANIPULATIVE, WHETHER SHE REALIZES IT OR NOT.
Unreasonable request made in an unresonable tone
"Blantant abuse/boundary-crossing/disrespectful language that must be dealt with firmly. You can either ignore her entirely or firmly tell her that you refuse to even communicate until she changes her tone. If she continues and you feel your anger slowly peak, remove yourself from her presence before you do or say something you might regret.
- The Tough but Tender Approach -
"... If you act like a supplicating wussy even when she's emotional every time she tests you in this way, you're actually training her to use her tears, fears, etc, to elicit a favorable emotional response from you.
"The reason she's acting out is because she feels taken for granted, unimportant to you, or replaceable. When she's feeling unloved you may need to learn how to pick up the changes in her behavior much quicker in order to take the initiative in getting her to communicate her needs in a respectful, healthy way."
"There's a difference between a woman who has needs that must be met for her to feel secure in the relationship and a woman who has wants that she demands you to fulfill just to appease her. This is why learning your woman's behaviors and actively listening to her is vital. Only through clear communication will you understand the difference and avoid becoming her emotional slave."
"A quality woman doesn't want to be with a man she can walk all over like a doormat."
"In short, men who always give women what they want and who let them get away with bad behavior are repulsive to women."
