Originally posted by Kafka
My life is like a horror movie and I just detach myself by not seeing myself as a person, but as an entity. People don't see me as a person anyway. I become who I appear to be.
so is mine. i literally live in a backward shit country cold almsot all eyar where females say fuck you if you try to meet them or look if you have designer clothes on or money. and where i am treated like a child and cant get a good gig going without starting an llc company or having a masters degree. retarded.
I tend to over worry. Think that I've upset someone or that I was too weird after a social setting. I'm afraid that if I quit k r a t o m for good, I'll start over drinking again. Basically, that's all of my "emotional insecurities" but if we want to get real deep, we could discuss everyone's physical insecurities.
Idk how I feel about my physical appearance. Objectively I know I am attractive to others. I have never felt perfect but looking back on old photos I can see it and that's what I seek to preserve. I'm not trying to change myself, I'm trying preserve myself, and I never will be happy with my appearance again even though objectively I know I am attractive and I am confident.
It's held me back like I won't travel abroad unless I'm happy with my appearance. It's kinda weird. Like rn I don't want anyone to see me until I've had my tattoo re-inked.
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post didn't die in a fire!
I've been using the Betwixt app and found that perfectionism is the main thing holding me back, like I won't go out and enjoy life if I don't look perfect and I never do.