Corrupt a Wish

1. 2017-06-06 at 1:27 AM UTC

   #1
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   This is a fun forum game I've seen before. Let's give it a shot.
   
   Person 1 makes a wish, which Person 2 then grants but with a horrific stipulation attached. After that, Person 2 makes a wish and it continues.
   
   I'll go first:
   
   I wish I had a cold beer right now.
2. 2017-06-06 at 1:29 AM UTC

   #2
   

   Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
   Granted but you can only consume it anally.
   
   
   I wish i had many shekels like the jedis but post WW2(Just in case you make me an actual jedi but in WW2).
3. 2017-06-06 at 1:39 AM UTC

   #3
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Granted but your shekels get you tortured to death during the Third Reich.
   
   
   I wish I could speak German.
4. 2017-06-06 at 2:29 AM UTC

   #4
   Pursuit-of-Happiness Yung Blood
   You can speak German.
   ...But only when you deep finger your asshole.
   
   
   I wish my net worth was in the billions.
5. 2017-06-06 at 7:12 AM UTC

   #5
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Granted but you must now live the rest of your life celibate.
   
   
   I wish I had a crack shack.
6. 2017-06-06 at 7:24 AM UTC

   #6
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle

   Originally posted by Dargo Granted but you must now live the rest of your life celibate.
   
   
   I wish I had a crack shack.

   
   Granted but you can never be there yourself.
   
   I wish I was in heaven.
7. 2017-06-06 at 11:50 AM UTC

   #7
   

   NARCassist gollums fat coach

   Originally posted by mmQ Granted but you can never be there yourself.
   
   I wish I was in heaven.

   
   granted but you're now dead and all the cool people are partying it up in hell. you're now stuck with a bunch of boring faggots trying to preach boring religious shite to you constantly 24/7.
   
   I wish I was invisible so I could spend the majority of my time kicking the shit out of street performing mime artists for lulz.
   
   
   
   
   .
8. 2017-06-06 at 11:52 AM UTC

   #8
   

   NARCassist gollums fat coach
   p.s. can we make the stipulations relevant to the wish. its pretty fucking lame otherwise.
   
   I won't mention dargo or persuit-of-happiness' names.
   
   
   
   
   .
9. 2017-06-06 at 4:54 PM UTC

   #9
   

   Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
   Granted, but the mimes figure out your secret and start packing heat. They hunt you with zeal, and you can't find less than four dangerous mimes at any given time.
   
   I wish I was beloved by everybody.
10. 2017-06-06 at 5:28 PM UTC

    #10
    

    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    errrr ehh, you can't shoot somebody who's invisible you numb, you got nothing to aim at. I could just dodge their bullets all fucking day. I'm invisible, they couldn't see where I was.
    
    ffs, this is fucking stupid.
    
    
    
    
    .
11. 2017-06-06 at 5:46 PM UTC

    #11
    

    Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
    They can't aim, but they can still hit.
12. 2017-06-06 at 7:29 PM UTC

    #12
    

    Number13 African Astronaut [dispute my snotty-nosed seagull]

    Originally posted by Zanick Granted, but the mimes figure out your secret and start packing heat. They hunt you with zeal, and you can't find less than four dangerous mimes at any given time.
    
    I wish I was beloved by everybody.

    
    Granted but it's the sort of love you have for the neighborhood retard
    
    I wish I had a tank
13. 2017-06-06 at 8:21 PM UTC

    #13
    

    NARCassist gollums fat coach

    Originally posted by Zanick They can't aim, but they can still hit.

    
    which is like having a blind dude try to shoot you, jesus fucking Christ man.
    
    
    
    

    Originally posted by Number13 Granted but it's the sort of love you have for the neighborhood retard
    
    I wish I had a tank

    
    urmm, this I guess..
    
    
    
    I wish people would take this game seriously.
    
    
    
    
    .
14. 2017-06-06 at 8:22 PM UTC

    #14
    

    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    the mime artists would have the cops turn up and shoot/arrest them long before they managed to get a shot on me.
    
    
    
    
    .
15. 2017-06-06 at 8:23 PM UTC

    #15
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by NARCassist I wish people would take this game seriously.

    
    Granted but now it's boring so no one plays
16. 2017-06-06 at 8:23 PM UTC

    #16
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by NARCassist I wish people would take this game seriously.

    
    Granted but you are now banned from playing.
    
    
    I wish I had self-tying laces for my boots.
17. 2017-06-06 at 8:24 PM UTC

    #17
    

    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    nah ahh, you can't grant my wish after somebody already did. you gotta grant his wish.
    
    
    
    
    .
18. 2017-06-06 at 8:27 PM UTC

    #18
    

    NARCassist gollums fat coach

    Originally posted by Dargo Granted but you are now banned from playing.
    
    
    I wish I had self-tying laces for my boots.

    
    granted but your boots now won't come off. the foul shitty bacteria that accumulates causes your feet to slowly rot and you end up having an Oscar pistorius job done by a back street surgeon. this goes wrong and you bleed to death.
    
    I wish I was high.
    
    
    
    
    .
19. 2017-06-06 at 8:29 PM UTC

    #19
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by NARCassist nah ahh, you can't grant my wish after somebody already did. you gotta grant his wish.
    .

    
    He didn't make one so his post doesn't count.
20. 2017-06-06 at 8:39 PM UTC

    #20
    

    mmQ Lisa Turtle

    Originally posted by NARCassist granted but your boots now won't come off. the foul shitty bacteria that accumulates causes your feet to slowly rot and you end up having an Oscar pistorius job done by a back street surgeon. this goes wrong and you bleed to death.
    
    I wish I was high.
    
    
    
    
    .

    
    Granted but you're high on krokodil and confined to a bamboo cage.
    
    I wish I could be done with work early today.