I'd like to go to Sweden for Christmas and have been putting off getting an Irish passport because of body dysmorphia for the photo. Right now the excuse is my eyelashes are ruined after false ones ripping them out.
I want a drama-free Christmas and for my mum to actually buy me something I want so I don't have to buy myself presents to avoid disappointment. I want the Christmas decorations and Akira's gifts to arrive in time and to actually have time to read the snow queen and other winter tales instead of being overwhelmed with studying. And I want the Christmas Dinner I get delivered to taste nice. I want to remember to plan something to do so I'm still having a life.
Originally posted by Kafka
I want a drama-free Christmas and for my mum to actually buy me something I want so I don't have to buy myself presents to avoid disappointment.
I want to remember to plan something to do so I'm still having a life.
First and foremost you can’t buy a life dear…sorry, you’re a miscreant destined to die alone without eyelashes. Even your stolen cat has to be trapped by you inside your little bedroom and forced to endure your presence.
Face it, your mother probably wishes she aborted you…….on the bright side, when it comes to buying yourself Christmas presents can probably afford this
Originally posted by Kafka
I got a passport photo months ago and realised purple doesn't suit my skin tone.
Given this information is on file, I’ve seen your passport photo…..if you quit drinking alcohol 24/7 that yellow skin tone tinge will fade with time. The liver is actually one of the few organs in the body that has the capacity to repair itself.
Greetings from the festive and joyous household of [Your Last Name]! I hope this letter finds you in high spirits at the North Pole. Please don't murder my family with your Santa Claws This year, my beloved son Nik has been exceptionally good, spreading cheer and klondyke throughout the year. I'm sure your elves, dwarves and liserdmen have been keeping a watchful eye on him because they are all nonces
In the spirit of Christmas magic, here's Nik's extravagant wish list for this year:
Kafkas Shitpussy Haxxors shitpussy a dh'ers shitpussy someone secret santaing with me and hoping to receive my shitpussy which is the greatest gift giving to someome who really wants to receive
[Your Name] [Your Address]
🎄 P.S. Mik and cookies will be waiting for you by the fireplace!, also I leave my bedroom unlocked so feel free to come molest me just do whatever you want I won't wake up, i'm a slut and you can be as rough as you want with me. stick a lump of coal up my ass for being naughty
