2021-12-05 at 4:29 AM UTC
I’m 20 years old I used to be on this site when I was like 16-17 using benzos and every now and then acid. Nowadays I take 10 hits of pure liquid lsd for fun every now and then. Severe fentanyl addiction smoking fake roxi’s off foil. I tried to shoot up H a couple times one weekend but I don’t think I got it right bc i never got to do a drawbacks but anyways didn’t rlly do anything to me. I’ve been to rehab like twice and I’m rlly running out of options in life shit sucks but I guess I got myself in this place. Might go into rehab so I can get back on subutex I haven’t been sober in like a year it’s either fent or subutex in rehab
2021-12-05 at 4:30 AM UTC
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2021-12-05 at 4:33 AM UTC
Also I was talking to my gf and she’s great she loves me but honestly drug addiction is heavy like she’s been thru sum shit with me that like fuck I feel bad and even recently she’s gotten back with me but after I got kicked out of my house out of now where she started acting really weird and now she just reads all my messages and doesn’t respond since yesterday abt 5 pm idk I don’t get it she hasn’t blocked me or anything and I’ve told her a lot of shit like please tell me why ur not answering etc I’ve told her just block me or if she’s breaking up with me and nothing she just reads everything and won’t pick up the phone I don’t understand what she’s doing but it hurts I mean I think it’s bc she could’ve found out I started following and talking to an old ex and yeah that is on me bc she’s a good girl I shouldn’t cheat but Idk I’ve never understood myself like I love her so much but yeah sometimes other girls pop up and it doesn’t mean anything rlly I just don’t know I get myself into so many situations bc I care for the people in my life but I always end up hurting them
2021-12-05 at 4:38 AM UTC
Recently I was working with my dad and his company and I hate it bc since my dad knows I’m a drug addict he doesn’t pay me even though I do a lot of hard manual labor so I tried my best to stay sober as much as I could and just work but eventually I had to get my own justice and I slipped $1000 from my dad… I’ve stolen money from my father before I’m not proud to admit it and occasionally I’ve even taken as much as $3,000 yeah I’m not proud but hey I’m a drug addict worst of all fent… fent is such an annoying drug bc once u have a tolerance to rlly nod off is just all I want bc yeahhh I hate my life I’m depressed everyday and I try my best and ny life just gets harder and harder I believe I’m very mentally ill not self diagnosing I have diagnoses but maybe I’ll share that later if anyone cares to interact
2021-12-05 at 4:47 AM UTC
Anyways recently stole $1,000 and bought 100 roxi 30’s ($350) and smoked them all in a motel bc my father found out I stole from him and I didn’t want to go to work and hear him bitch about it so I left to a motel and just nodded off all day and watched Hulu for like three days since that’s all I could afford since it was $100 a night and I had to put an extra $100 deposit so it was $200 for the first night I’m already down $550 make it $600 so I had $450 left and that was only 3 nights of smoking and chilling since that’s like my heaven like I’m so simple and depressed I just wanna nodd and watch Hulu but eventually I had to go home and I knew it was gonna b trouble that’s when my girlfriend stopped talking to me and my dad called the cops on me when he realized I was home I had to run out as skate to my friends house currently at friends house while mom and brother bitch at me to get help. That’s a whole situation too like my mom and brother hate my dad but they leave me to deal with my dad they both complain and bitch so much about my dad but leave me to deal with it and then ask me why I have mental illness like they supposedly want to help but don’t actually help it’s so dumb anyways I think I might go into rehab I have medical insurance that I somehow qualified for free but anyways someone talk to me give me advice like why is my gf just reading my messages and not answering me I’ve said a lot of cringey shit like yeah dude I’m down bad and it sucks bc I love her a lot or any advice on how to make easy money pls DM or yeah thanks hope u guys are getting high on whatever u enjoy and are somewhat okay mentally bc I am not ok mentally at all <333
2021-12-05 at 5:03 AM UTC
You share a lot of personal information for someone who I'm pretty sure isn't known by anyone currently here.
You should leave your girlfriend alone while you fix your shit because she deserves better.
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2021-12-05 at 5:20 AM UTC
RIPtotse
victim of incest
[my adversative decurved garbo]
Rofl bro it's like me back on totse except America was in Afghanistan so we all got hooked on dope after the oc80s changed to op.
Bro go to jail or fucking die we don't really care unfortunately. We all currently have addictions that are much deeper rooted/active for longer or have lost someone that was very dear to us that does.
Start simple. Are you eating? Showering daily? If so good, get on methadone and try not to fucking use anymore.
Or go buy a 10 pack of rigs and join the club I'm so over this fucking opioid epidemic. It's worse than covid and filled with coddled children.
2021-12-05 at 5:21 AM UTC
No i simply don’t have my shit together I’m sorry this irked u today
2021-12-05 at 5:25 AM UTC
RIPtotse
victim of incest
[my adversative decurved garbo]
I'm just sick of seeing people die and go to jail for drugs homie.
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2021-12-05 at 5:26 AM UTC
now that its been a few days since those posts are you doing any better?
2021-12-05 at 5:36 AM UTC
RIPtotse
victim of incest
[my adversative decurved garbo]
Maintenance drugs.
Preferably the full agonist kind.
Start becoming an amateur pharmacologist.
Bupe isn't great for fent addiction..well ateast for me it wasn't even with 3 2mg kpin a day. Maybe I was too young..that was probably when I was 23 24..30 now and been an opiate addict since 16.
Take it from me.
GET OUT NOW
2021-12-05 at 5:46 AM UTC
Originally posted by D3VDINSIDX
It hasn’t even been an hour I believe yet but, Im fiending for nicotine
HASNT BEEN AN HOUR YET, I THOUGHT YOU POSTED THIS ON THE 2021ST DAY OF APRIL YEAR 12 WTF SMDH GUNTS
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2021-12-05 at 6:14 AM UTC
Originally posted by D3VDINSIDX
I feel u, it’s not a pleasant life I’m not that bad of a person I don’t involve myself in many things but I wish you peace and that many blessings come to u soon
Calm and Soothing Police Detective Voice: Hey bud, sometimes good people do bad things. Why don't you get it off your chest by helping me establish intent and motive ( ive been watching EPIC INTERROGATOINS ON UTUBE )
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