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I've remembered my true calling.

  1. #1
    I'm just so goddamn fucking happy I could cry



    I've spent the last two months in Turkey, where my mom's from. Since I don't speak the language, was withdrawaling from a plethora of psychiatric medications and spice, am possibly developing paranoid schizophrenia maybe maybe not, had nothing to do to occupy my time besides play video games I don't enjoy...not really enjoying anything except some crunk tunes and toons...I spent approximately 60 days in pathetic psychological agony obsessing over a 14 year old that was my last real social interaction (besides the mental hospital) who might possibly be the antichrist. Sent her all sorts of terrible things and I hope that when I get off the plane I'm not going to get killed by her family/thrown in an interrogation room. My only real contemplations over this time period have been I'm eh pretty cool guy without any of the cool because I mostly just write massive accusatory rants laced with venom, don't really have a personality or any life to me since I'm so tired and apathetic all the time, but things will get better once I'm in college because then I'll have friends and shit like that, not my mentally deviant e-friends that are all 10 users of this website. Maybe I am kinda disabled, whatever to the point...

    I spent my last day in Turkey today with my mom and her three aunts. After saying goodbye and everything, one of my aunts gave me FOURTY dollars!!! I noticed how I don't move or speak much or make eye contact and mostly just stare into space with a look of anxiety on my face, then I'm looking around the resturaunt I'm in and think, damn, why do I always feel like I'm on bundy. After my aunt gave me the fourty, the first thing I thought was I'M GOING TO BUY SO MUCH FUCKING bundy AS SOON I GET BACK. Like 20 bottles of two dollar generic cough DM. The thought of drugs hasn't really passed my mind too much since I only got drunk about 4 times in 60 days, overdosed on psuedoephedrine twice, and huffed keyboard cleaner once. Now I remember my one true love, the girl who's been with me forever, through good times and bad, mostly bad, and that's lady bundy. She's the lovliest woman you could ever meet, she caresses you in the darkness and lets you float through your mind, your memories, and your shadows. All of my happiest memories involve me flying through tussin space...I had my own private world I could retreat to, outside of any problems and outside my own body, the stories and dynamics of tussin space would develop as an alternate life course that I had entered, sort of like a parallel universe of energy auras and the true essences of existence. I'm going to be reunited with my long time lover, my best friend, my soul. There's no point or meaning to real life, but everything makes sense once you swim through the emptiness, like returning to the womb as a fetus. You just are. We all have our one true calling in life...in skyrim you are the dragonborn, but I am the TUSSINBORN, and I'm no longer in the state of greif and confusion I've gotten myself into, because the holiness is about to return to me, and I can't wait.

    My body is ready.
  2. #2
    Now I can completely regress into myself again!
  3. #3
    Obbe Alan What? [annoy my right-angled speediness]
    The internet is a medium that people can use to communicate across the globe at a speed never before seen in history. When you spill your heart out to the entire world and not even a single person replies, you are truly alone.
  4. #4
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    ^we are living in a cybernetic universe. Care to take the red pill? please stand by.
  5. #5
    The internet is a medium that people can use to communicate across the globe at a speed never before seen in history. When you spill your heart out to the entire world and not even a single person replies, you are truly alone.

    That's okay, my bby is back.

    bundy is my lover and Elliot Rodgers is my god.
  6. #6
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    "bundy is my true calling" damn son, props on giving me a top tier chuckle at least.

    I mean do I even want to know what you intend to do when your twenty bottles run out?

    On a similar note my previous employer is finally choking up the last $500 they owe me, I had just written it off as the usual fucking you get when dealing "businessmen". Think I'm going to buy a decent set of headphones and blow the rest on some kind of drugs. Two to three hundred dollars of psychedelics would take an unreasonable amount of time to plow through, and would the swill I drink ($300 / $20 * 1.75 = 26 liters and change, not sure my liver could take it). Stims could be good but but the lack of sleep would be a downer, especially when I run out. Maybe I'll spring for some darknet opiates, that could be fun. I wonder how much bundy I could get, how long it would take to do it all.
  7. #7
    I'm going to mope for a week in a semi-dissociated state until I buy more bundy, so on and so forth, that's what I've spent the last six years doing, until I got hooked on spice which is more or less heroin addiction
  8. #8
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    Do you ever take the powder extract or whatever? It sounds appealing because it's actually surprisingly hard to find gaff free stuff at reasonable prices around here plus drinking cough syrup is kinda ghetto.
  9. #9
    Nah, it's part of the ritual, walking to 15 different pharmacies to buy cough syrup as to not look suspect on a sunny spring day, getting turned down by half of them because you go there constantly or because your dad told them to stop selling you cough syrup even though you're an adult, then picking up a 1.50 bottle of tropicana white grapefruit juice for enzyme inhibition, drinking it on the way home while collecting decently sized cigarette butts. Then you go into your kitchen with your speakers and laptop, blasting "I Don't Want To Grow Up" through the open windows to let all of your neighbors know you're about to trip on dissociatives. You push the 16 coricidin pills out of the foil, organize them into neat little groups of four to swallow at once with the remaining grapefruit juice, then uncap the bottle of maximum strength Robitussin, keeping your face away from the bottle as to not activate the gag reflex, exhaling deeply, and downing the 4oz bottle in one gulp. 840mg of bundy down the hatch. After about twenty minutes my stomach begins to hurt a bit, and I start slouching kinda relaxed, over the next two hours tracers and a glowing aura in the vision starts to form.. it becomes increasingly harder to read or understand what you"re doing, or keep your eyes open. Then you either spent the next 6 hours completely braindead retarded unable to use your keyboard or understand what the word "The" means, sort of like you downed a 48 pack of beer in ten seconds, or the exhaustion overcomes you and you lay down with your eyes closed in the dark, what are first mild closed eye visuals quickly morph into complex three dimensional figures and your soul leaves your body to interact and fly alongside these complicated objects multidimensional objects that transcend time and space. Then you come down a bit, open your eyes, think "wow that was fucking cool", then you watch the room spin for another 6 hours unable to comprehend the cartoons on the TV because you're processing images at one frame a minute, then you get hypomanic for a day, then the day after that you're just zoned out. It's a beautiful ritual and this exact same thing happens every single time I do it.

    Note: Unlike traditional psychedelics, you never learn anything from bundy
  10. #10
    It fucks you up so badly it reduces your IQ to single digits. For example, one time I made a thread on Zoklet wondering if I took enough bundy to trip, I peaked a few hours later and tried to describe my trip in the thread

    The post was "gufj"
  11. #11


    Don't you wish you could be like this?
  12. #12
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    I mean nice hair at least.
  13. #13
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    I'm so zoned out on valium and oxycodone i nodded out at least 5 times while reading and took about 35 minutes to read all of the thread.

    Feels good man.
  14. #14
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    sploo is such a ghetto princess. and wavves is the shit

  15. #15
    Note: Unlike traditional psychedelics, you never learn anything from bundy

    QUALITY
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  16. #16
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Turkey, where my mom's from

    stopped reading here

    get off the internet and kill yourself you mudlord
  17. #17
    It fucks you up so badly it reduces your IQ to single digits. For example, one time I made a thread on Zoklet wondering if I took enough bundy to trip, I peaked a few hours later and tried to describe my trip in the thread

    The post was "gufj"
    when taking bundy have you ever experienced extreme itching like SEVERE itching last time i tripped on bundy that happened to me and its never happened before. i took an off brand walmart bottle of straight bundy pills and a bottle of cough syrup with bundy polysterix. im thinking it was because of the poly bundy but im not sure..
  18. #18
    Dissociator African Astronaut
    Lol bundy itches u must be secular joy
  19. #19
    Lol bundy itches u must be secular joy
    your an ignorant bitch
  20. #20
    Dissociator African Astronaut
    your an ignorant bitch

    I know more about psychopharamacology than you think you know about your left hand kid.
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