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what is wrong with me

  1. #41
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by infinityshock lovingly allowed lard-ass lanny the luxury of lapping the loins-leviathan while the little lad larps as a laotian ladyboy lapdancer---.-.-.---------------.----.----------.-.-.-.----.----------------------.-.---.----.--------------=--(b­anned) sounds like bidens daughter

    you should unrepress is. share it with the world.

    off topic, but http://i.4pcdn.org/pol/1603673438846.jpg
  2. #42
    Bugz Space Nigga
    SPILL YOUR GUTS. CLEANSE YOUR SOUL. WRITE A TELL-ALL
  3. #43
    Donald Trump Black Hole
    Originally posted by Bugz SPILL YOUR GUTS. CLEANSE YOUR SOUL. WRITE A TELL-ALL

    Go on twitter thats how I unwind
  4. #44
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Your life has to have meaning and purpose; without meaning and purpose, you are only an empty shell of your true potential. It all comes down to options. If the only options you give yourself is stewing in your own lack of purpose and meaning, that's exactly what you will be, because that's the only option you gave yourself. Choice is good. If you have no choices, you can only have no meaning and no purpose. So sign up for a worthy cause. Reach out and open doors. Create for yourself a wide range of choices and options. And you don't have to participate in all of them all of the time, but it's just nice to have those doors open, for times when one of them might be appealing and/or attractive. Today, any one of those options you've created for yourself may not be appropriate, but nobody knows how you'll feel about it tomorrow, not even you. So go ahead and create a handful of choices/options for yourself. It's not hard.

    is/was that the reason why you have/had forum crusades and mod geehards on multiple sites ?
  5. #45
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by vindicktive vinny is/was that the reason why you have/had forum crusades and mod geehards on multiple sites ?

    Sure. I always have at least a dozen hobbies running at all times. Even when I was 8 years old, I built crystal radios out of 99 cent do-it-yourself-kits, then I'd sit in the wee hours of the still of the night and listen to the mysterious voices and conversations racing across the netherworld.
  6. #46
    Ghost Black Hole
    I think gardening could change your life. Imagine pulling one of these suckers out of the ground come harvest time. Wouldn't that be nice?

  7. #47
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    That looks like a throat polyp
  8. #48
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by mmQ 1. Why haven't you seen your dad in a long time? Do you remember the last time you did? Do you talk to him or text him or anything at all? When did your parents separate? Do you feel responsible?

    2. I never called you a psychopath. Did I?

    3. What is THE EUROMAIDEN? I am dumb. Just tl;dr it for me in a sentence or two. Did you graduate high school? Is their kindervarden through 12th grade there or is it different?

    4. Do you think it's our purpose to have purpose? Do you feel like theres something you could do that would achieve said purpose that you feel is lacking in your life?

    5. Hate crimes.. that's fine. Im probably on board. I still want to know WHERE and more specifically WHY. as I am federal agent. Are you a Stephen paddock or a school shooter or just want to really fuck one single persons world up? Who are we hating and why?

    1. I didn't have a particularly good relationship with him growing up. I resented him a lot at the time, but later understood better that he had his own problems and was at least able to keep us fed. The last time I saw him was at my grandfather's funeral - afterwards he got real mad over nothing and started screaming at my girlfriend so I punched the side panel of his van in and told him it'd be best if he didn't come back.

    2. the implication being that you'd have to have a similar trait to not care what those people think

    3. The riots in the Ukraine, the US coup, and how it's now a failed state.

    4. I don't think I have any real, inherent value, so it doesn't matter what purpose I try to make for myself. Believe it or not I try to help others who need it, but it feels like a contradiction because I don't think it matters whether they succeed or not.

    5. Wasn't really a serious answer, and I'm not going to talk about this because I don't need orderlies AND the federal police turning up at my apartment. I will say though that I find it interesting how many people feel 'crushed' by the world around them choose to go out quietly, rather than taking up their grievances with those responsible. Even 'terrorists' typically just make a lot of noise, rather than seeking an audience with the people responsible for their misery.
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  9. #49
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Ghost farming yams sounds pretty chill

    Being able to enjoy simple basic things like taking care of animals or plants is a nice feeling and even if you're severely depressed and suicidal, it's a nice distraction.

    Because when you're doing something like gardening or playing with cats you usually aren't thinking about negative shit the entire time when you can just focus your brain on something even if it's just some bullshit that doesn't matter. It's hard to fill up an entire day or weekend like that though

    stupid normies seem to have no problem and their entire life is distracted by social things. If you aren't a very social person or have a lot of hobbies or interests it can be hard

    I have a thousand projects and books I've started but not finished
  10. #50
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    well gont you can come stay with me in my parents shed it has a cat's suite that you can stay in if you want to visit in kansas its not far from beefa
  11. #51
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Zanick so you don’t just shut out strangers, but you also deprive the people who love you of knowing what you carry; that it’s so bad, it makes you want to die, & you don’t want their help.

    this is... I think I know what I was trying to say but did it poorly. It's something that I've never tried to put into words because I don't want to risk other, better-adjusted, people starting to think the same way.

    To me there are barely visible strands between the most abhorrent crimes and everyday people. It's easy to wave away criminals as 'bad people' who are different, especially when it comes to the most depraved crimes, but actually considering their motivations and how they justify their acts to themselves allows you to see similarities in the thought processes of others. Or yourself.

    The best example I can give are related to sex drive - everyone has their desires that they're biologically compelled to pursue to varying degrees - most people are unable to live an ascetic lifestyle; their impulses are too strong and they aren't able to find a reason to summon the strength to fight them (not that they should be expected to).

    If you understand the strength of your own sexual desires, do you think they'd be any easier to control if you were a child molestor, a rapist, or some sort of extreme sadist? Would you be capable of the same things, if only your desires were different?

    There are two specific instances that I've made the mistake of researching in the past that I don't think I'll ever be able to get out of my head - not so much because they're in any way interesting, but because I don't believe in good and evil. I don't see the perpetrators as fundamentally any different from most people, and yet they've committed some of the most vile and disgusting acts I've heard of.

    It makes me feel as though we're irredeemable on the whole.
  12. #52
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    I feel ya, OP. I dunno. Don't commit public transport anyway. I used to be the kind of person who'd put a lot of effort into trying to convince folks why bus travel was a bad idea, but I don't have the energy anymore. Truth is life's probably not going to get much more fulfilling if you're not the kind of person who can easily distract yourself or just enjoy the ride for the ride's sake. Hope you have some kind of radical epiphany and recalibrate your outlook on life, but barring that there's probably no changing that you're just going to be grinding out another 50 meaningless years of existence.

    I think this is the part where you're supposed to start panicking and get some chick pregnant and get so distracted providing for your family that you essentially pass the buck onto your child and they can deal with all of this themselves in 20-30 years. *shrug*
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  13. #53
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    opey is a charasmatic gentleman
  14. #54
    Nil African Astronaut [the overexcited four-footed chanar]
    I wish I could say something beautiful and profound but I feel similar. Who would have thought if I spent my time hollowing out most ideals, dissecting values and contextualizing beliefs that I'd end up in the desert.

    Suicide has its appeal, but as pointless as life is it can still be interesting, then again I'm easily amused.

    Yada yada yada, sudo WAS right about hope, which is at base faith. hope&faith bby.
  15. #55
    Obbe Alan What? [annoy my right-angled speediness]
    All of us, at some time or other, need help. Whether we're giving or receiving help, each one of us has something valuable to bring to this world. That's one of the things that connects us as neighbors--in our own way, each one of us is a giver and a receiver. As human beings, our job in life is to help people realize how rare and valuable each one of us really is, that each of us has something that no one else has, or ever will have, something inside that is unique to all time. It's our job to encourage each other to discover that uniqueness and to provide ways of developing its expression. Discovering the truth about ourselves is a lifetime's work, but it's worth the effort.

    Forgiveness is a strange thing. It can sometimes be easier to forgive our enemies than our friends. It can be hardest of all to forgive people we love. Like all of life's important coping skills, the ability to forgive and the capacity to let go of resentments most likely take root very early in our lives. Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.

    Some days, doing 'the best we can' may still fall short of what we would like to be able to do, but life isn't perfect on any front; doing what we can with what we have is the most we should expect of ourselves or anyone else.

    The media shows the tiniest percentage of what people do. There are millions and millions of people doing wonderful things all over the world, and they're generally not the ones being touted in the news. We get so wrapped up in numbers in our society. The most important thing is that we are able to be one-to-one, you and I with each other at the moment. If we can be present to the moment with the person that we happen to be with, that's what's important.
  16. #56
    Originally posted by Nil Suicide has its appeal, but as pointless as life is it can still be interesting, then again I'm easily amused.

    I find backing some project on kickstarter gives life that incentive to keep going, at least until said kickstarter delivers. As is at the moment I should be around till at least Aug 2021.
  17. #57
    Ghost Black Hole
    maybe the problem is you aren't doing enough drugs
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  18. #58
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Obbe -snip-

    Mr. Rogers?

    I don't mean to be totally dismissive, but I do not believe people to be fundamentally good and I do know that the news plays up the negative. It doesn't change the fact that even the 'best' people are fully capable of horrific acts and gives me no inspiration.
  19. #59
    There is no good or bad.
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  20. #60
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    Originally posted by Technologist What made you so detached? It sounds like a coping mechanism.

    Was there one big thing that made you detach yourself from things/people around you, and then you just use it as a protective measure?

    Do you have to leave some “mark” on society to feel fulfilled?

    No matter what our difference of opinions are, you are a worthwhile person.

    1 & 2. I am not ignoring this post, I was just thinking of a way to answer it. If I knew that there was a single concrete thing that drives a wedge between me and 'happiness', more accurately 'fulfillment' then this would be easier.

    3. The question isn't so much as whether I need to 'make a mark' - realistically most people won't, outside of their offspring and resulting family tree. The thing that concerns me is whether it's even possible for me to do something that makes my life worth having taken place. I despise hedonism as an ideal and I feel like it'd be very selfish for me to start getting women pregnant - it seems very much like an attempt to alleviate my own ennui and negativity, only to thrust it on someone else.
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