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Niggas in Space > Spurious Generalities > Fuckin' barn swallows
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Fuckin' barn swallows

  1. 2020-07-20 at 3:05 PM UTC
    #1
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I keep forgetting about this goddamn barn swallow that's protecting her stupid nest right on the path of my 5 minute walk to and from work.

    It follows me for like 100 yards just CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP hovering around me and then dive bombing my head. Lol. Its SCARY!

    So I'm just walking through these parking lots yelling at the air and flailing my arms to anyone that happens to see me, probably looks like I'm hallucinating on some week long tek bender.

    Does it not know I am WREN? I am a fellow bird. I am a FRIEND.

    Anyway. I just wanted you to know my daily struggle.

    Thank you.
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  2. 2020-07-20 at 3:12 PM UTC
    #2
    kroz weak whyte, frothy cuck, and former twink
    Originally posted by mmQ I keep forgetting about this goddamn barn swallow that's protecting her stupid nest right on the path of my 5 minute walk to and from work.

    It follows me for like 100 yards just CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP hovering around me and then dive bombing my head. Lol. Its SCARY!

    So I'm just walking through these parking lots yelling at the air and flailing my arms to anyone that happens to see me, probably looks like I'm hallucinating on some week long tek bender.

    Does it not know I am WREN? I am a fellow bird. I am a FRIEND.

    Anyway. I just wanted you to know my daily struggle.

    Thank you.

    I understand big bromo. But its not so much the birds, but damn squirrels, bark at me.

    Another thing, is possums, i guess their cute in an ugly kinda way but one night i was coming home and there was possum on the stairs going up to my place and he wouldn't move, he was just looking at me like fuck you. So I had to climb up the side of the stairs to get to my place because I didn't want any problems.
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  3. 2020-07-20 at 3:49 PM UTC
    #3
    vindicktive vinny Black Hole
    Originally posted by Bill Krozby I understand big bromo. But its not so much the birds, but damn squirrels, bark at me.

    Another thing, is possums, i guess their cute in an ugly kinda way but one night i was coming home and there was possum on the stairs going up to my place and he wouldn't move, he was just looking at me like fuck you. So I had to climb up the side of the stairs to get to my place because I didn't want any problems.

    those are nothing.

    you should see how mothwrs react when i approach their daughters.

    all i wanted to do was just talk but they kept in overreacting.
  4. 2020-07-20 at 3:54 PM UTC
    #4
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Bill Krozby I understand big bromo. But its not so much the birds, but damn squirrels, bark at me.

    Another thing, is possums, i guess their cute in an ugly kinda way but one night i was coming home and there was possum on the stairs going up to my place and he wouldn't move, he was just looking at me like fuck you. So I had to climb up the side of the stairs to get to my place because I didn't want any problems.

    Yeah we dont have possums up here but I remember them from my time in Flordida. They're weirdos for sure. Millions of squirrels here, MILLIONS, but they dont bark at me that i notice. They just climb up balconies and eat everyone's bird seed.
  5. 2020-07-20 at 4:01 PM UTC
    #5
    mashlehash victim of incest [my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
    my barn swallows often quaint, sometimes often. It's a sometimes often kind of thing. If the barn swallows would only offer an often subtle hand, I would be congendered to approve of his simple subtle song: A Place Where We Can All Get Along

    Subtle Faith
    And Often Embrace
    This is the Trail That We Chase
    Often Race
    Rich Black Man
    Huh?
    Rich Black Man!
    Black and White
    black AND white
    stripe stripe stripe
    (black and white)
    play that ball game
    know your common name
    make a pizza
    have a firther
    looking for chris
    maybe i will find him
    (clap your hands)
    my name is Chris

  6. 2020-07-20 at 4:03 PM UTC
    #6
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Fucking Barn Swallows man...
  7. 2020-07-20 at 4:25 PM UTC
    #7
    Jiggaboo_Johnson Black Hole
    Possums have big scary teeth. I can only imagine the infection you'd get if one of those bit you with all the shit and filth they eat, It would be like being bitten by a Ko-modo dragon. (word filt-er on that...ridiculous)
  8. 2020-07-20 at 4:40 PM UTC
    #8
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Unreal. I just walked way out of my way to avoid it and I saw it doing its thing in the distance, and then this minivan with a mom and three kids pulled into the HEART of its territory, so I stopped to maybe get some laughs as I watched the kids all get dive bombed too, but the fucker didnt even pay them any mind.

    Bullshit! :)

    They were all girls though so maybe the bird somehow knew that and didnt think they were a threat. Or maybe it really is just singling me out. Or maybe its because I wear a black cap when I'm walking through there and it assumes I'm black and it doesn't like that.

    I'm gonna try to film myself walking through the DANGER ZONE when I'm done with work. Maybe I can get a good shot of the bird flying at my phone if I'm not too busy freaking out like a little bitch.

    Do they ever actually try to hit you or just get close and intimidate you? I guess I wouldnt be so freaked out if i KNEW it wasnt gonna actually like scrape the top of my head or some shit.
  9. 2020-07-20 at 4:44 PM UTC
    #9
    WellHung Black Hole
    Originally posted by mmQ Unreal. I just walked way out of my way to avoid it and I saw it doing its thing in the distance, and then this minivan with a mom and three kids pulled into the HEART of its territory, so I stopped to maybe get some laughs as I watched the kids all get dive bombed too, but the fucker didnt even pay them any mind.

    Bullshit! :)

    They were all girls though so maybe the bird somehow knew that and didnt think they were a threat. Or maybe it really is just singling me out. Or maybe its because I wear a black cap when I'm walking through there and it assumes I'm black and it doesn't like that.

    I'm gonna try to film myself walking through the DANGER ZONE when I'm done with work. Maybe I can get a good shot of the bird flying at my phone if I'm not too busy freaking out like a little bitch.

    Do they ever actually try to hit you or just get close and intimidate you? I guess I wouldnt be so freaked out if i KNEW it wasnt gonna actually like scrape the top of my head or some shit.

    They solely want to intimidate u, to get you to leave. They would prefer to do that and avoid contact, at the same time, to minimize injury, and avoid u fighting back.
  10. 2020-07-20 at 4:47 PM UTC
    #10
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    I Love You
  11. 2020-07-20 at 4:47 PM UTC
    #11
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by WellHung They solely want to intimidate u, to get you to leave. They would prefer to do that and avoid contact, at the same time, to minimize injury, and avoid u fighting back.

    I keep my head down and I walk really fast to show that I'm just a dude trying to get somewhere and not be a threat. But then it comes at me and I flail my arms which probably agitates it more, but its agitating me by coming at me. I cant win.
  12. 2020-07-20 at 4:48 PM UTC
    #12
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Sudo I Love You

    ❤💓❤
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  13. 2020-07-20 at 4:59 PM UTC
    #13
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Lmao. One time I went to throw out the trash & as I lifted the lid, a possum flew out hell with about 9 baby devil's. I shut that shit up real quick, cuz I'm not a pussy. I tackle a problem. Thank you.
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  14. 2020-07-20 at 5:03 PM UTC
    #14
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    The swallow will grab you by the hair, if you have any. Take your hat off and you will find out
  15. 2020-07-20 at 5:04 PM UTC
    #15
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    🙄
  16. 2020-07-20 at 5:17 PM UTC
    #16
    Jiggaboo_Johnson Black Hole
    Originally posted by mmQ Unreal. I just walked way out of my way to avoid it and I saw it doing its thing in the distance, and then this minivan with a mom and three kids pulled into the HEART of its territory, so I stopped to maybe get some laughs as I watched the kids all get dive bombed too, but the fucker didnt even pay them any mind.

    Bullshit! :)

    They were all girls though so maybe the bird somehow knew that and didnt think they were a threat. Or maybe it really is just singling me out. Or maybe its because I wear a black cap when I'm walking through there and it assumes I'm black and it doesn't like that.

    I'm gonna try to film myself walking through the DANGER ZONE when I'm done with work. Maybe I can get a good shot of the bird flying at my phone if I'm not too busy freaking out like a little bitch.

    Do they ever actually try to hit you or just get close and intimidate you? I guess I wouldnt be so freaked out if i KNEW it wasnt gonna actually like scrape the top of my head or some shit.

    Black absentee fathers could learn a thing or two about child care from Barn Swallows.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. 2020-07-20 at 5:47 PM UTC
    #17
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by DontTellEm Lmao. One time I went to throw out the trash & as I lifted the lid, a possum flew out hell with about 9 baby devil's. I shut that shit up real quick, cuz I'm not a pussy. I tackle a problem. Thank you.

    How would you hamdle this one? Should I bring a tennis racket and just try to swat it down? I mean I respect the bird and I want her to be happy that's why I walked around it now. It's really hard to just walk through its path and ignore it though.
  18. 2020-07-20 at 6:12 PM UTC
    #18
    Jiggaboo_Johnson Black Hole
    Originally posted by mmQ How would you hamdle this one? Should I bring a tennis racket and just try to swat it down? I mean I respect the bird and I want her to be happy that's why I walked around it now. It's really hard to just walk through its path and ignore it though.

    If you swat the mom you are swatting the chicks that rely on mom and dad bringing the bacon home...could you live with all those lives on your blooded hands simply because your selfish ass can't deal with a bit of dive bombing by a bird that weighs 3 ounces?

    MAN UP! as the bearded types who grow a beard to compensate for their womanliness like to say.
  19. 2020-07-20 at 8:42 PM UTC
    #19
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by mmQ How would you hamdle this one? Should I bring a tennis racket and just try to swat it down? I mean I respect the bird and I want her to be happy that's why I walked around it now. It's really hard to just walk through its path and ignore it though.

    Shoot the bird but don't kill it, then make it watch as you stomp the life out of her children. Kill her last.
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  20. 2020-07-20 at 8:47 PM UTC
    #20
    stl1 Cum Lickin' Fagit
    Barn swallows are still better than barn spitters!
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