Okay so a couple days ago I went to a haunted house ride with the mother jackie and i brought my cat in my back pack and they said the ride was closed but we still got on and it started up.. to our surprise and it started playing the tales from the crypt theme and the cart actually started moving and my cat got out of the bag and on my lap and was like daddy are whats happening are we going to die tonight? And started hugging me and I was like no son.. its all good archie. And Jackie was like holy shit why do I hang out with you my mother is 60 years old and is going to have to have to take care of franchesca by herself. There were like paper ghost and weird shit like that and graffitti and there was a bag of dick hanging from the ceiling and I was yelled out when it almost tea bagged me but I ducked it and we got out of there. She was like Doug, if you were my husband I would divorvce you because you what you did to my ass the other night, when we got out.
But then it got even weirder and not in a sexy way, I was just literally walking home and I stepped on an ossopum and it farted and coughed and I started yelling fucking me man fuck me because it scared me because I don't like seeing dead thing out of nowhere.
But I told jackie just a little while ago that if this was the last day on earth I would marry her and kiss her viciously into the night before we die and I will always see her in heaven.
But yeah heres the ossopossum i found I moved him off to the side of the side walk, he got murked real hard
