Folx, I'm before you once again... I know I got mad and rage quitted the crispr thread... Freakin... And you can sit here and moan about me all day, effin... Freakin... Freakin... But I am here to participate in my community actively on the web, and I am healthy, I am getting money, I have resources... And I am... Like I said... Participating. So...
Anyway, It's the middle of August, I am trying to stay busy, things are getting serious with Milena and I... I just found a load of fossils the other day... Went out, picked them up, and just brought them home. They're really cool, and it's crazy how a silly rock can sit there and give you so much introspection... So... Anyway...
It's been going on ten years now since I've been to prison... I have been eating plenty of food, I have done some jobs here and there... I've been getting in the weight room... Life is good. I know I got upset with the establishment (the law) here in Fairfield County the other day... But, freakin... I just... Am doing what I can... Freakin...
I been donating plasma... I had gotten cut on some glass last month, and I was worried, because I saw some lil tiny african kids walking around by the machine where the glass was... But it's been more than the prescribed symptom time period and I feel fine... So that's good. I am happy, I feel good... Freakin... I'm trying to grow my relationship with Milena, I'm 30 now, so it's a real trip dating this woman, who was a cougar when I met her as a early-twenties adult. And it's all good, because, it's reasonable, and we appreciate each other. Freakin'... I freakin... I love her as a person and a woman. We are mature, and we are.. Just... Like I said, trying to grow. Freakin... It's a lot of work, and I toil, from doing all types of stuff. I have to work on the car, I have to get money to take us out to eat. Sometimes I give her cash just to make myself feel important... Freakin... It's a lot of work, a lot of sacrifice... Freakin, and that's what it is to be committed. Freakin...
Milena and I went to Ceaser Creek the other day to dig for fossils... We came up with a few specimens, that, I, quite frankly don't know what I'll even do with... I have plenty of food here at home... It's hard work digging for them fossils, it takes a lot of energy. Freakin... I'm just glad I can be engaged in/with my world... Freakin... I been banging it out with that plasma.
Freakin... My house is nice, I got these smart bulbs and what not. I got a camera in my living room that I want/need to use to make sure I'm taking my medicine.. Freakin.. Freakin. Freakin... Anyway... Freakin fona is a trip, that dude makes me really think. I don't know how I feel about him... He gives me some real vibes. Freakin... Uhh, Freakin, I j-ust, you know... Been keeping to myself, though, you know, trying to hold it down. I'm trying to do somethings with my society, man, you know... Freakin' trying to make an impact. I been doin things, I been moving this cash, freakin, to people, and things... Freakin... I did donate blood a handful of times... Freakin', that made me feel good. I tried to go friday, they said my iron was too low, so I was feeling poor. Freakin... It's just the way it is. Freakin...
I've been on this website grinding since it opened... Freakin, Fona been here too.. He was on zoklet with me. I used to sit on tinychat and talk to him but we kind of fell off... Freakin... Livin' in the city...
I still think about fona, I talk to him every other day on and off. Freakin, Yea I miss chelle. Jigaboo Jones, Idk what him and I are going to make of our association, he is one unique bag of potatoes Man... It was funny seeing the backward responses he used to make in the threads, lol... That guy. Freakin.. Give me some time man... Freakin... CandyRein, I give her grief, but it's funny, because she just... Keeps the flames from spreading, and I like that... Scron, is amazing, like always... Freakin, really knows how to produce... Freakin... Spectral, freakin, keeping the board alive. Freakin...
I freakin... I have been doing some things, here and there to support my perrogative... I'm putting it in with Milena, here, freakin... Gettin' it in...
Freakin, Bradley, my arch nemesis... Freakin, I know dat nigga gon do good. Freakin...
I miss fona, I miss talking to him, I miss playing games with him, I miss the comraderie... Freakin hot ass night out in baltimore on the computer... Freakin, sitting there with my smart phone, turning on the air conditioner on and off in the bedroom, goon shit... Freakin, this smart tech is lit. Freakin... Saving on my energy bill. Freakin, *sigh*... But yea, I miss fona... Freakin... Sitting here rehashing... I do read my old content sometimes, and it gets pretty lulzy sometimes... Freakin... It's like paying taxes... Because you have to sit there and process it all and conscious. Pretty heavy consideration retrospectively... Freakin..
Food for thought. Anyway.. Anyway, but.. I been out hurr, keeping my mind stimulated, thinking about the future, keeping my balance... I pay my bank fee every month... This month, I spent my ymca money and had to get it back at octapharma... Sat there and drank a whole bunch of water, gorging to get my heart rate low enough so that I wouldn't have to be deferred... Freakin... Haven't been able to make it to church, been either too occupied or too poor... Yes, I have been praying. Last year I talked to fona about getting baptised. I seen he got married, which is good. Bill Krozby is Moved on, freakin... Lanny is a good team player, I like his state of mind... Freakin... I haven't been using... The last time I used was some weed and a sub, and I really wasn't feeling it, because it's a buzzkill when you think about how you gotta pay money to score driving a car that you have to pay money to fix... It's a real thought process... And freakin, you just sit there, and mathematically, it's like, freakin... You know, this should be perfect, but then you gotta think about intellectual property laws, social media, criminal law, money... Freakin, it's all very stressful. And this is me being my own person, because I remember my friend Scooter telling me one day, like... "I can be happy with some weed and a thirty" and he's a smaller guy... And freakin, I was just kind of thinking to myself when I had my stash, like... This is what it is.. And so, freakin... Scooter, I hope that pack comes through... As I digress...
It's gettin' late..(.) Freakin...
I tried to get on messenger today to hit up Dude Ethan, freakin, I was just itching for some paper... Freakin, I got lined by all these questions trying to use the app... Freakin...
Trying to go tomorrow to donate plasma... Trying to get some money... I'm sitting here writing this, I gotta eat, so I'll be healthy. Freakin... Milena, is on my mind... I'm trying to take care of myself... Seems like every other day, I come up with a new ache or pain. Gotta eat... Freakin. I'm happy, if you're happy... Mashelhash is coming out of the basement, I see... Freakin... I gotta get my life good, so I can be involved... I freakin... Am doing my best. Trying to grow... So, freakin... I just doing acts, one day at a time. Feeling composed... Thinking about tomorrow, and thinking about the time that has passed... Freakin... I am trying to be a good person... I gotta eat... I'm trying not to watch too many nazi videos, trying not to let my mental state rise... Coping... Thinking about my next move... Freakin... I just hope I can do things right... Trying to be agreeable. Freakin...
I don't know when I'll talk to fona again, and yea I hope he gets back with chelle. I don't know if we'll ever get the commune (lifestyle) we were shooting for (that's not a psyche ward) freakin, but I'm ok if we can break bread together and play video games in the evening...
I watched Godzilla videos today on youtube... Freakin looked at my fossils... It was a good day. Watched music videos... Freakin...
I freakin... I'm sitting here trying to turn Milena into a super model... She's nearing 50 and I got to use my head to figure out how I'm going to (give her a) makeover lil tiny. Freakin. I'm still alive, I think therefore I am, so I can do it... I adore this Woman.. Freakin, I just hope we overcome obstacles that can hinder our growth, and I pray we don't stumble... Freakin...
In conclusion I hope tomorrow warms up nice and ain't that bird dog weather september chill shit... Just want to keep the flow going. Freakin...
Night
