Dead friend, dead grandma, homeless

2019-12-29 at 1:27 AM UTC

#1

Dissociator African Astronaut

So I was going to a rehab retreat... originally for 30 days. Last place I was at. I destroyed property, got arrested and then sent to the psychward for a week. Since my moms done with me I had to sort out the whole thing, and when youre in a ward its nearly impossible to set up plans because of how chaotic it is to ask a tech for stuff.. sinxe they prob clean up smeared feces all day..

Eventually found the place.. after 30 days i knew i eas ready to go.. every week they cycle between 7 NA speaker tapes. NA book study steps 1-7

My mom said if I do 60 I might be able to go home.. well my glue started melting at day 45.. and a few days ago learned about schplews death.

My temper and erratic behavior got the best of me and the owner dude was like. Yeah its time to go NOW

My mom drives 2.5 hours to have a face to face meeting. I keep it chill.. then when I get in the car to leave, she says "yeah you're going to a sober house or i can drop you off on the side of the road.

Im not about to spend qny more time around this whole recovery game except for going to meetings on my own accord. Cant live in close quarters with people that either 1. Are big book thumpers or 2. People that steal your money and meds

So atleast my mom had the decency to drive into civilization before she kicked me out.. and been homeless for like 10 hrs.

I really wish I couldve retained that sobriety but homeless sobriety is like suicide tier terrible.

Also i tried to jump out the car at 65mph so my mom called the cops said I was tryna off myself. I smooth talked my way out of going to a ward and started walkin around scoping the area, places to sleep.

If i was 21 I couldve just bought some vodka (or if i had the stones, stole it) but, 250 immodiums, 35 beedrills, 4 benzedrexes, dozens of propranolol and gabapentin

I forgot what I was talkjbg about

2019-12-29 at 1:29 AM UTC

#2