These days I think not enough people have been taking the time out of their busy days to appreciate the complex yet delicate, but at the same time overwhelming sense of self hatred that is placed inside each and every one of us by our creator at the time of conception. This, to me, is a damned shame. We were are all unique, we were all given our own personalities, so that the hatred you have for yourself is a unique one. Unless you are some sort of well known or infamous person, not many people will ever get the chance to know you and dislike you. And for most people that are not total assholes, probably only a few people will ever hate them.
You get to spend your whole life with yourself, and nobody knows yourself like yourself. Think about it. What do families do over time? The couples eventually grow somewhat apart while keeping each other occupied just enough so that they are not crushed by loneliness. The children eventually move away. The more time you spend around your family, the more you hate them, and the more you want to get away from them. But you are stuck with yourself your whole life, you can't get away from yourself. You may find a few hours or even a few days relief in drugs or some other vice, but you will need to be there to deal with yourself when you come down.
There is no getting away from it, everyone gets to feel it and everyone's self hatred is unique and different. To get to know someone intimately is to know the things they hate about themselves. To be vulnerable is to allow others to see the parts of you you hate. The individuality and intensity of it and the desires it spurns are strange when you think about it.
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If we been vibin on the low then youβd know Iβm not in a Chevy Cruz π
π Was supposed to post these earlier π
Chevy Cruz where?
LOL!π
I like Chevy but nah.. and Iβve got decent credit , no men drive my car or crashed it.. stop slandering meπ Iβm about to be free from work Iβm in a great mood donβt mess with me!π
Haiya Mash π
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Mewsik
African Astronaut
[diagonally photosensitise my summation]
Originally posted by gadzooks
I legit think you might be me.
That whole paragraph describes me to a T.
Shit, that's exactly how it goes.
How exactly does one go about finding that proverbial 'equal'? I don't think anyone ever does. It's a lifelong struggle.
I think the first step is to truly understand who and what you are. Being as whole as possible and to not look for someone else to make you whole, but rather to just enjoy the wholeness of each other (whatever that might be). Being equal simply means both being whole. Knowing yourself, your needs, you likes, your wants, your values, things you don't want or don't like or can not tolerate. Once you reach that point, your likely hood of attracting what you want and need will happen .. Trying to picture what that person looks like is counter productive .. People who are as whole as they can be (they can provide for themselves and their necessities) won't desire to manipulate or change or create another human being .. If you can find who YOU are and maintain that and continue to grow emotionally and mentally .. it will happen organically.
That old saying about 2 halves make a whole is the biggest bunch of bullshit ever.
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Originally posted by WE SMOOTH
Casper do you have Japanese jeans?
Sewed up wit the finest silks and oriental themes? most definitely faberge egg, finest fois gras pleated placid mastery pink panther master of disastery finely toned tuchus hoe nude immobilized in plastery Dusty tome rockin Ancestral elvish architecture Fitted MAGA hat and intro Jordan peterson lecture.
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The last time I did it I tried to break the Sigma on about one gram administered in small doses over a couple of hours. Also took some DPH which was total shit but back then I thought that's the way to do it.
I don't remember much of it but I'm pretty sure I laid down infront of a bar because I couldn't stand anymore and was somehow teleported into my bedroom. I also grabbed stuff around my room and put it on a table and on the ground and back on the table in a retarded motion loop which entertained me immensly.
Bundy is a nigger.
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Is is weird that when I get depressed, I imagine my face in a little square on a nightly news bulletin, beard grown in, head shaved? In block letters there's something about two heavily armed and armored gunmen. I look at my face in the mirror and I try to imagine how much more aged, how much more stern and beaten that face would look? And what would be the final straw? Would it be something big? Or just maybe someone fucked up and forgot the avocado on his breakfast burrito. Maybe that's all it took. But I feel sort of jealous of the man on the tv. He figured it out. For once instead of laying around feeling angry and tired, he did some something. Anything. Followed it through to completion. And since they can't track down family who have anything to say, they end up interviewing the black dude outside the grocery store. "Yeah I knowd dat dude. I mean he was cool nawmeen? Always bought me Reeses and brought me pizza n beer. always seemed friendly,But I never thought he do some wild shut like dat".
/end creative writing segment. North Hollywood bank robbery also do be fly tho, for the record.
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Riding a bike around town on a Saturday around 10pm - 12a is pretty interesting. I never suspected so much would be going on all at the same time. There is so much to your town you'll never know even existed unless you go riding around on a bicycle. I rode through downtown and saw five people around the square playing pokemon go, I rode towards the park and passed by these two old women in their 50s/early 40s walking around. There was a drunk woman outside a bar crying about something while a man pretended to console her. There was another woman who was yelling about somebody who stole her bag. As I rode by the library there was a teenager with a portable speaker blasting rap music while swinging LED lights around in circles. I rode by a huge historic house with a bunch of children talking, maybe they were having a sleep over. There were homecoming teens everywhere earlier. All of this action going on, simultaneously in real time. Yet before that there I was sitting in my car browsing Voat, /pol/ and NIS in silence. I honestly think I might get a better DSLR that can handle night vision better (anybody got any recommendations?) and do a documentary on the nightlife of my town. If I do that I'll upload it to vimeo and accept donations, physical Blu-ray package will also be an option.
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