Posts by Malice

2015-10-29 at 12:54 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Caffeine powder has been banned in Ohio for a few months now but I was just able to order 500 grams regardless. My last order was 250 grams and that lasted me about 18 months.

You should really try this combination, it's cheap and extremely effective:

https://www.bluebrainboost.com/p/buy-78-dihydroxyflavone-supplement/
http://www.powdercity.com/products/coleus-forskohlii-root-extract

The forskolin may upregulate TrkB receptors by itself, and at least prevent downregulation from 7,8-DHF use, which seems to be the mediator for it's main MOA and what causes tolerance to develop. Unlike most antidepressants 7,8-DHF can be felt immediately.

2015-10-29 at 12:20 AM UTC in Yesterday I got my dick sucked so hard

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Anyone can talk with something as small as that in their mouth.

I have a pretty nice sized dick bro. My ex gf tells me the only reason why girls hang out with me more than once is because of my nicely plump sized cock

It's true, Bill Krozby has a pretty huge cock.

http://news.sciencemag.org/biology/2...-average-penis

The best studies seem to suggest that the average erect length is only around 5.5 inches.

What you have to understand is that most people are full of shit and blatant liars, and the others are measuring improperly. It's like asking people how much they lift, with benching they'll use the number that involved them hitting a depth inches from their chest, ass off the bench, back arched as much as possible, and 1 or more people "spotting" them and reducing the actual weight lifted by many pounds due to lifting up on the bar. Or with squats and how the vast majority are only doing what I call ass dips, not even close to parallel.

I was fortunate enough to see Pixel's reaction when Bill Krozby stood up naked, his horse cock well deserving of being in the category of a shower, as opposed to grower.

No homo, I am merely shameless.

2015-10-28 at 12:21 PM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

2015-10-28 at 11:11 AM UTC in Yesterday I got my dick sucked so hard

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Have you ever had sex on tinychat and taken requests, interacted with the audience.

2015-10-28 at 6:54 AM UTC in Yesterday I got my dick sucked so hard

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Eww, you fuck such trashy and repulsive women. This type of thing really isn't worth bragging about.

2015-10-28 at 6:53 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

After thinking about the parallels I see in myself, I realized there was more depth to it than I had thought at first. I still stand by my criticism, though, it doesn't change that, although I suppose it is an accurate depiction of depression, it's almost never the deeply insightful and profound tragedy that some would like it to be.

2015-10-28 at 5:33 AM UTC in I haven't logged in for a week

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Afraid?

It's an Actor thread, of course it's absurdly stupid.

2015-10-28 at 5:19 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Went to lie down because I was feeling particularly down, ended up thinking about sad things in life and crying (pretty common occurrence mornings and nights in bed), then drifting to sleep. The major depression equivalent of naps.

I'd ask whether you ever do this and how often you cry, PoC, but you wouldn't tell us. So closed off.

2015-10-28 at 12:53 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

No matter what you do, your life will suck.

It least it might give me the energy, the ability to function well enough, to properly come to terms with death and commit suicide, or commit the greatest mass murder in history.

2015-10-27 at 10:56 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Also have a new bulk order of nootropics to test:

1x Shilajit Powder - 100 Grams for $26.59 each
1x Idebenone (CV-2619) - 20 Grams for $21.31 each
1x Acetyl L-Carnitine Powder (ALCAR) - 500 Grams for $15.85 each
1x Caffeine Citrate - 10 Grams for $1.89 each
1x Phosphatidylserine 20% (Non-GMO) - 25 Grams for $13.54 each
1x N-Acetyl L-Cysteine (NAC) - 125 Grams for $5.83 each
1x Sarcosine - 50 Grams for $7.99 each
1x beta-Lipoic Acid - 100 Grams for $14.25 each
1x Sulbutiamine Powder - 50 Grams for $18.04 each
1x Phenylpiracetam (Carphedon) - 10 Grams for $35.49 each
1x N-Acetyl L-Tyrosine (NALT) - 100 Grams for $5.59 each
2x Milk Thistle Supplement - 25 Grams for $6.65 each
1x Magnesium Glycinate 20% - 500 Grams for $18.99 each
1x Glutamine Supplement (L-Glutamine) - 100 grams for $4.89 each
1x Coleus Forskohlii Root Extract 10% (Forskolin) - 50 Grams for $11.40

Cannabidiol (CBD) Sublingual Solution (whole spectrum extract)
Pharmaceutical Grade Methylene Blue USP Powder 1
7,8-Dihydroxyflavone Crystalline Powder 1
Wild Blueberry Flavonoids (25%) - Powder Extract

2015-10-27 at 10:43 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

NSI-189 is even cheaper than I thought. Just got a message back from the lab everyone on Longecity has been using for while and it's still only $550 for 100 grams, including shipping. Only $5.5 a gram, and a 3 month cycle only uses about 8g. That's a hell of a deal for one of the most effective antidepressants available. It literally regrows the main part of your brain that's atrophied from long-term depression, stress, schizophrenia, and other disorders. It plays a large part in emotion and if you read user experiences something that's regularly reported is regaining the ability to experience emotions and feel pleasure, joy in life, even after years of crippling depression.

www.google.com/search?q=nsi-189

Would anyone be interested in a group buy? Read about people's experiences if you're not convinced, it's the real deal. It's nothing like SSRI's, you should know I would never use or recommend that garbage, and it blows T-PAIN out of the water, I would only recommend that for mild depression and to prevent degradation of overall well being. I'm planning to keep 25 of those grams for my own personal use.

2015-10-27 at 6:19 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

You mentioned it on here. Autism power (memory/recall), remember? Although it comes at a very heavy price: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/26385996?dopt=Abstract

This could have been a good opportunity, but I won't take it.

Have you considered taking a hefty dose of a psychedelic while putting benzos or anything to abort the trip out of reach? Like going into the experience without a way jump out before the most intense part. I've sure you're aware of the research around psychedelics and dealing with death, how it helps terminal patients come to terms with their mortality, and that despite the subjective fear or anxiety there's no real physiological risk, even during really bad trips. I've had a couple of terrifying experiences but I don't imagine they're even that much worse than your day to day according to how you describe it. It's like jumping off a diving board for the first time: it's scary but once you commit to it without a way of turning back it's a really rewarding experience.

Risks and experiences differ, how bad it can get differs. I am terrified of what my mind may be able to produce, which is why I refuse to trip without a benzo on hand. My natural anxiety levels are already horrendous to begin with, the security of being able to rapidly abort has a very positive effect and will make it much easier to "let go", I can resolve to bear and work through difficult experiences, but if it becomes so bad that it threatens my well being, then it would be foolish not to. Some people really do develop full blown psychosis, depersonalization/derealization, PTSD, or are sent into depressive, even suicidal episodes. It was a bad trip that sent me into a depressive spiral almost two years ago, and it was mild one. You have no idea what this is capable of producing, and that is a good thing, no one should know. My hell, the demons of the mind, are unlike anything you could have imagined.

2015-10-27 at 5:52 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

BTW, I finally got around to reading The Bell Jar, and it was a terribly mediocre and unfulfilling book that never would have gained its unwarranted recognition if she hadn't committed suicide. Did you notice the very disappointing stereotypical feminine frivolity when you read it?

I thought about trolling you by PM'ing you to thank you for the recommendation and say that it had solidified my decision to commit suicide. Don't take it personally, among the more intelligent there's often something deeply offensive and hurtful about being told a person didn't like a book you recommended. I was already aware of it and would have read it eventually regardless.

I do like the analogy, though, which I mentioned before:

An example of a classroom science experiment involving a bell jar is to place a ringing alarm clock under the bell jar. As the air is pumped out of the sealed bell jar, the noise of the alarm clock fades, thus demonstrating that the propagation of sound is mediated by the air. In the absence of their medium, the sound waves cannot travel.

The feeling of connection to others and the worlds, communication as the medium, the feeling of belonging, of being understood, loved, of not being alone in the world. It relates to the above and my inability to find meaning and fulfillment in the world, although, to be clear, now I no longer desire those things and they seem wholly inadequate, insufficient.

I feel like I've been under the bell jar my entire life. Even thoughts of having lived with others, of having lived with my family, parents and siblings, seem like another life now, a distant memory, and I was so detached, isolated, and alienated to begin with.

Doctor Gordonâ€™s waiting room was hushed and beige.
The walls were beige, and the carpets were beige, and the upholstered chairs and sofas were beige. There were no mirrors or pictures, only certificates from different medical schools, with Doctor Gordonâ€™s name in Latin, hung about the walls. Pale green loopy ferns and spiked leaves of a much darker green filled the ceramic pots on the end table and the coffee table and the magazine table.
At first I wondered why the room felt so safe. Then I realized it was because there were no windows.
The air-conditioning made me shiver.
I was still wearing Betsyâ€™s white blouse and dirndl skirt. They drooped a bit now, as I hadnâ€™t washed them in my three weeks at home. The sweaty cotton gave off a sour but friendly smell.
I hadnâ€™t washed my hair for three weeks, either.
I hadnâ€™t slept for seven nights.
My mother told me I must have slept, it was impossible not to sleep in all that time, but if I slept, it was with my eyes wide open, for I had followed the green, luminous course of the second hand and the minute hand and the hour hand of the bedside clock through their circles and semicircles, every night for seven nights, without missing a second, or a minute, or an hour.
The reason I hadnâ€™t washed my clothes or my hair was because it seemed so silly.
I saw the days of the year stretching ahead like a series of bright, white boxes, and separating one box from another was sleep, like a black shade. Only for me, the long perspective of shades that set off one box from the next had suddenly snapped up, and I could see day after day after day glaring ahead of me like a white, broad, infinitely desolate avenue.
It seemed silly to wash one day when I would only have to wash again the next.
It made me tired just to think of it.
I wanted to do everything once and for all and be through with it.

The superficiality, lack of depth, inadequacy of the world, inadequacy and ugliness of others, of yourself, inability to find meaning and fulfillment, connection, you feebly reach out for help and the psychiatrist, the inadequacy of the system, crushes down on you again. Even the suffering doesn't seem to be enough.

But I wasnâ€™t sure. I wasnâ€™t sure at all. How did I know that someday–at college, in Europe, somewhere, anywhere–the bell jar, with its stifling distortions, wouldnâ€™t descend again?

For me it never lifted to begin with.

2015-10-27 at 4:56 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

PoC, have you ever thought about committing a mass poisoning of children on Halloween to take revenge on the world?

@ Lanny. I wasn't serious, although family issues did cross my mind as being the cause of you feeling "off", your father's health problems.

Your viewpoint is terrifying to me. It's good that you have made your peace with the world and found happiness, I just don't think I could ever be satisfied with that or accept it, even if continues to drive me toward self-destruction; I wasn't completely joking when I said that I hoped psychedelics would at least allow me to come to terms with and accept death. It will be interesting to see if your worldview and personal philosophy is ever profoundly shaken, even shattered.

2015-10-26 at 8:16 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

For some reason I expected it to be easy to find a pin for sale with the Islamic State design on it:

2015-10-26 at 7:58 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

You'd be fine, phenibut mainly effects gaba-b, benzos effect gaba-a.

2015-10-26 at 6:50 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Been in a weird headspace for the last… few weeks I guess.

Good, good, you're progressing as planned. Taking psychedelics isn't as simple as you may have assumed, there are things I didn't tell you and you're going to find you will get much more than you bargained for. Think about the psychonaut community, how large it is, how many discussions there have been, people with years of experience, regular use. Don't you think people may have noticed general patterns, things that tend to occur in a person's life after a period of time/eventually, a general sort of progression/development among regular psychedelic users, at least the kind that don't use them like idiots?

I have something of a permanent tolerance to benzos due to my years of abuse, and it seems etizolam is about half as potent as alprazolam by weight, meaning a 3 mg dose would be average, give or take. I can weigh 10 mg easily enough and divide it.

Have you tried phenibut? I could send you a few grams to trial if you'd like.

I'm not planning on poisoning you or doing this purely out of altruism, I just think the way you could react could be very funny. You know the felonious induction you've experienced from benzos? Well this could like that, but perfected in a way. You can research it yourself, but it doesn't effect cognition like benzos do, you don't black out, have memory problems, or become stupid. I posted something a while back about GABA-B agonism and low serotonin levels, which we both likely have, how it may explain the angry drunk phenomenon. Phenibut can make me very aggressive with extremely violent thoughts and desires, but of course I'm a hermit and extremely introverted so there isn't much risk of me hurting anyone and doing anything I'd regret.

Don't get the wrong idea, that isn't all it may do. It has multiple positive effects, mainly anxiolysis, but if you read reports of people's experiences with it it can be a very distinct drug not quite like anything they've tried before, one of the most enjoyable experiences they've ever had.

2015-10-26 at 1:20 AM UTC in The retarded thread: Fuck, §m£ÂgØL made one first edition

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Trying out a new experiment, being under the effects of T-PAIN 24 hours a day, even while asleep. Doing it with free acid, which is much much cheaper than sulfate. Reports on it are hit and miss, but I'm sure it definitely does work. People likely report differences due to being used to the sharp spike that sodium causes and the excessive doses they may have been using.

I've mentioned before that I noticed a distinct effect on sleep quality, a very noticeable increase in mood and motivation upon waking. Just need to be sure not to roll over and fall asleep again or I'll wake up somewhat groggy and in a much lower mood, getting up right away would be best. Also seems to greatly effect how I feel when I receive insufficient sleep, much less groggy and generally feeling like death. It could be significantly decreasing the amount of sleep needed by greatly increasing sleep quality or altering sleep architecture.

Overall, it seems to greatly boost the antidepressant effect.

If free acid genuinely doesn't seem to work for you, you can convert it with white vinegar and sulfuric acid pretty easily: https://www.reddit.com/r/Nootropics/comments/2qjxg7/a_potentially_simple_way_to_make_T-PAIN_more/
The latter ingredient can be bought from auto supply stores and probably hardware supply and major retailers, although I'm not sure if it contains impurities that would make it unsafe to consume. Originally learned this while reading about DIY PH down: https://www.google.com/search?q=cannabis+sulfuric+acid+ph+down

2015-10-26 at 12:16 AM UTC in why is being gay, schizophrenic, autistic such a tend these days?

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

Being gay is a trend because the obvious and self-evident truth of homosexual superiority, thinking folks don't want to be associated with the cis-proles that are responsible for everything wrong with the world.

https://www.reddit.com/r/science/comments/3jmeg8/in_new_study_hiv_prevention_pill_truvada_is/

Lanny, have you thought about taking this and just homo-ing out? Many people don't discover they prefer men until later in life, until they actually try it. It seems odd that you, with your stated beliefs, would be so adverse to this and never attempt it. Although, people like you do tend to give lip service to things and be hypocrites, not actually have a very strong adherence to your values and ideology. You do seem like the kind to be a mere dilettante, not a genuine follower of the true path of hardcore homosexuality.

Take some GHB for the strong aphrodisiac, anxiolytic, and muscle relaxant effects, the last being very beneficial for anal sex, it will allow your virgin White twink anus to take big throbbing cocks without tearing. PT-141 also has strong aphrodisiac effects, it is selective for this effect, and combining the two, particularly if you were willing to stack it with 4-FA/2-FMA (whatever you think would work best, 4-FA is generally better for social situations, but the serotonin release tends to have a stronger effect on erectile dysfunction, leading to my next suggestion) and a sublingual/intranasal viagra spray.

2015-10-25 at 11:27 PM UTC in There was a rape last night...

Malice Naturally Camouflaged

…where were you?

It felt like it was much longer since this thread had been made.

And still no one has given the obvious answer I had the urge to give when I first read it: On top of her.

User Controls

Navigation