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Posts by Malice
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2017-08-02 at 2:17 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSCame across a(n extremely) little known/rare quote from Einstein:
On 16 May 1951, Einstein wrote to G. Broggi: "In my eyes, a philosopher of Hegel's type is a man who juggles words that correspond to no clear concepts, a kind of word-music"
Hilarious, Einstein himself hated Hegel too. I wish I could go back in time and kill him, along with Marx. -
2017-08-01 at 11:45 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
I'm going to devote daily practice to memory techniques, the Method of Loci/Memory Palace, unless there's a superior version.
I already have the abnormal hyper-memory aspect that can arise in Asperger's, among the elite even among aspies, but I also have superior visual(spatial?) memory, which has neurological correlates as well.
For example, one critique people have of the method for use with tests is that requires too much time to learn, but I can adapt unusually rapidly, far more than a neurotypical, another is that it requires too much time to create the visualization, but my ability, for example, remembering the entire path from stepping out my door to the train, is in such high fidelity and arises so rapidly, with ease, that this isn't an issue. I can do it with my eyes open instantly, even while multitasking, such as during the request at the beginning of the video, in a filmographic (variation of eidetic) style where I can increase the travel speed, jump ahead, go backward, stop and look at/focus on a scene with more detail/greater clarity.
I also just learned/understood exactly why I have such a difficult time naturally remembering names and dates like I do with other information. It makes perfect sense! What valuable data, this is great. Now I can learn ways, develop the skill, to attenuate this.
Watch out motherfuckers. Autism power + natural obsessiveness + rapid learning due to high affinity = My memory's going into savant mode.
We'll see whether this has practical effects if I begin to consistently ace every test. I already tended to score extremely high, top of the class or near, without even studying or barely paying attention, giving a shit. -
2017-08-01 at 8:40 PM UTC in lol im a psychopath!
Originally posted by anra i have a chance at reproducing you dont :o
Is this supposed to be a good thing?
Oh, wait, I may actually be genuinely psychopathic myself. I've stated numerous times in the past that I genuinely strongly display multiple traits and score within range.
Just recently I was reflecting on some of the ways I used to behave in school, particularly after I left home, and my behavior could be absolutely psychotic, particularly many of the things I wanted/was planning to do, my beliefs.
This came to mind when thinking about college, and then I realized that I would seriously need to keep myself in check, be aware of, reflect upon, and control my behavior, any natural impulses i experience, particularly if I get pissed at other students or a professor, or even during debates/discussions, which is a genuine risk due to how I respond, how incredibly ornery and misanthropic I can be, increasing the longer I am around others, enclosed areas with people, the higher the density the worse, having the most detrimental effect with me, increasing as time goes on.
Simply someone saying idiotic or an affront to my pride can cause me to go into an incredibly vitriolic state where I deconstruct and disparage them as effectively as possible. I'm even capable of making multiple professors cry if I don't watch it. -
2017-08-01 at 8:21 PM UTC in lol im a psychopath!You should be euthanized. You're bound to get what you deserve one day. I very much doubt you'll live very long.
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2017-08-01 at 7:57 PM UTC in Things that women are better atExcerpted from On Women by Arthur Schopenhauer, one of the wisest men in history. Profoundly prescient and far ahead of his time.
https://ebooks.adelaide.edu.au/s/schopenhauer/arthur/essays/chapter5.html
The nobler and more perfect a thing is, the later and slower is it in reaching maturity. Man reaches the maturity of his reasoning and mental faculties scarcely before he is eight-and-twenty; woman when she is eighteen; but hers is reason of very narrow limitations. This is why women remain children all their lives, for they always see only what is near at hand, cling to the present, take the appearance of a thing for reality, and prefer trifling matters to the most important. It is by virtue of man’s reasoning powers that he does not live in the present only, like the brute, but observes and ponders over the past and future; and from this spring discretion, care, and that anxiety which we so frequently notice in people. The advantages, as well as the disadvantages, that this entails, make woman, in consequence of her weaker reasoning powers, less of a partaker in them. Moreover, she is intellectually short-sighted, for although her intuitive understanding quickly perceives what is near to her, on the other hand her circle of vision is limited and does not embrace anything that is remote; hence everything that is absent or past, or in the future, affects women in a less degree than men. This is why they have greater inclination for extravagance, which sometimes borders on madness. Women in their hearts think that men are intended to earn money so that they may spend it, if possible during their husband’s lifetime, but at any rate after his death. -
2017-08-01 at 7:13 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSYou really should have given that post a try and pondered it.
Some time after waking up, in bed, I finally thought of a thought experiment combining both the image of a water wheel I had in mind and gravity. -
2017-08-01 at 11:19 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSAh, nearly forgot to mention. If you wonder what spurred my philosophical spiel, I decided to take some NSI-189 sublingually before running to the store, shopping as fast as possible, then running back with a heavy large reusable bag, alternating the arm holding it tucked in. I stated before that it provides an enormous boost when combined with intensive exercise, both in mood and cognition, the latter of which may have been particularly pronounced. By god will I certainly experiment with this, possibly augmentative combinations.
At times, even just this morning, my neurological/cognitive activity felt intense and overwhelming enough I genuinely felt worried as to whether I could contain it considering how much it will likely increase after breaking free of hikidom and being in a stimulating environment; being around others as the critical missing piece that is clearly demonstrated to have profound beneficial effects. How on earth could it not after such an incredibly extended and extreme period of self-imposed isolation?! Particularly considering how profound my suicidal depression was, the vast array of detrimental effects I succumbed to. It would simply be ludicrous to believe it wouldn't lead to a drastic change!
Paper on my reformulation of Buddhism, which should be understandable to the masses and far more concise. Containing the entire system and the non-mystical interpretation of every aspect. It is necessary to grasp the entire system as a whole, which seems to be a unified philosophy of life, reminiscent of a cycle, the cycle of samsara/life, in order to gain true understanding. Each aspect taken individually is incapable of providing a full understanding, an accurate understanding, of that aspect.
Further/advance anti-natalism-negative ethics-negative utilitarianism. Provide novel thought experiments and arguments. Reformulate the view into a more perfect form.
The magnum opus on the nature of reality/life, the elucidation for the superiority of non-existence, ending all life in existence, tackling the problems of consciousness and identity, justifications for continuing to "live".
My magnum opus on a general theory of autism. "Autism as a Self-Perpetuating Traumatic Cycle". Hmm, nay, this certainly described the process that occurs to the low functioning, their withdrawal and regression, but now it appears far too limited in scope for what I intend, am capable of...I require a new title...
4 excellent long term projects I already possess extensive knowledge of and have thoroughly mapped out in my mind, memorizing every key point, the structure, what to include!
It is fully possible I may drive myself past the brink of insanity in these extremely excessive and obsessive pursuits, with how I tend to neglect all else to an incredible degree when I am enthralled.
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-08-01T11:21:40.511565+00:00 -
2017-08-01 at 11:03 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by greenplastic Well, he's clearly obsessed. I don't really know enough about neuroscience and don't really read his long posts about it most the time but I don't doubt that if he tried he could do it. Unless he's just blatantly wrong and arrogant about it. But I've seen people who aren't really very intelligent at all get degrees just from being slightly self disciplined. I wouldn't be surprised either way.
Originally posted by aldra haha yeah, I agree with you, in terms of background knowledge he'd probably do fairly well…
in terms of actually attending a university and getting the degree, lol.
Never underestimate the obsessive power of Asperger's. We can obsess to an inhuman degree, like nothing else.
You must understand the entire process I've gone through in my life. It has reached a level of complexity it is nearly impossible to convey. The abilities I've developed, I possess, that have been apparent here, such as the abnormal memory and reading speed, other traits and abilities that aren't as readily apparent on a message board.
Ponder this: I have renounced food, eating one humble meal a day that contains everything required for a balanced diet, along with supplementation, extremely easy to prepare, which produces enough food for two days. I have no family or personal relations whatsoever, no friends, love interests etc. I have no need to work. I have never owned a television and do not use Netflix as a substitute, abhorring the overwhelmingly vast majority of what is produced. I have never used social media and never will. I do not waste time on youtube and whatever else commoners while away their time on. I do not have children nor will I ever. I am highly selective in my reading, the vast majority of news stories being of no substantial value or lasting importance, being able to be forgotten the day after without consequence, articles being insubstantial and commonly horrendously inaccurate and sensationalistic, written by liberal art major brats who are unqualified to remark upon or write on anything, even their educational major. I do not, nor have I ever, viewed sports, finding them unbearably dull. I despise the vast vast majority of music and am completely oblivious to what is popular these days. Of course I do not fixate on celebrities, politicians (republican celebrity gossip), or other inane matters the masses do, having completely insulated myself from such things. I do not engage in the worthless activities that normal humans engage themselves in outside, the goods and services they purchase which never lead to lasting happiness, fulfillment, or flourishing. My thoughts, which I am perpetually engaged in, have absolutely nothing to do with mundane matters, everyday reality/life. I have barely even played videogames for quite a long time. I do not fixate on gossip, people in my vicinity, I keep my eyes to myself and do not pay attention to them, respecting privacy and focusing on my own life. I only select the highest quality material to read.
I am liberated! Practically a different species to man, in a manner, those with Asperger's often describing themselves as akin to alien beings; and I am a stranger in a strange land.
Truly ponder what I have stated, revealed! Do you understand the significance of this? Such an astounding liberation of time, energy, effort I am able to expend to obsessively pursue my interests. Renunciation is the engine that drives one toward enlightenment!
https://vividness.live/2013/11/22/renunciation-in-buddhism
We will see soon enough whether I am able to exceed in formal academic pursuits!
Originally posted by Captain Falcon Malice, if you can get a legit degree in neuroscience, I will literally reimburse you for your entire college education.
This is not a joke.
That isn't necessary because there's no way in hell I'll have to pay a dime for it, thank god. Fuck student loans and going into an absurd amount of debt. -
2017-08-01 at 10:24 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSPatent pending
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-08-01T19:11:52.690282+00:00 -
2017-08-01 at 3:48 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by CASPER How do I make a forlorn/angry/betrayed watery eye emoji? Which one is that one?
https://niggasin.space/smiley-refrence
This is the closest one, it kind of looks like what you're on track to look like anyway:
Look, I even made some friends. I've been gaining their trust since earlier this year when I first spotted them. Ash seems to be a stray/neighborhood cat, likely had a home earlier in her life, and she also has her ear clipped, which is a sign that a stray/feral cat has been spayed or neutered. Bella seems to be semi-feal based on her temperament, not nearly as socialized, although she likely had a home at one point, but has been homeless too long and won't let me touch/pet her. Little Guy is her daughter and was never socialized during the critical period, so she's even more adverse to people, fully feral, although I've gained her trust enough that she feels comfortable coming inside to eat and me being within 5 feet of her, even closer if she's calm and I use the proper technique to not frighten her.
Ash today, in the kitchen cupboard above the counter. She likes to spend most of her time in here, even multiple days, now:
Pretty momma Bella. Look at those blue eyes, that fur, and the variegated fluffy tail (Looks super fluffy when she's standing up and it's pointed upward):
Little Guy (Thought it was a boy for a while because of course I couldn't check and she had an aggressive looking face, seemed very tough, and did act the part as well.):
It feels really nice to finally have some company. Cats are by far the animals I feel the most affinity toward, particularly strays and ferals. They're like me in many ways. They come by daily and tend to hang around out in front. -
2017-08-01 at 3:31 AM UTC in THE OFISH 2017 COLLAGE THREAD!!!
Originally posted by 10 Ft. Ganja Plant lanny iz cute
Did you know he has a degree in computer science and works in the financial industry in the Financial District (FiDi) of San Francisco earning over 100K a year in income and benefits, as well as already having saved about 300K in a low fee index fund, possibly retirement fund, despite only being 23?
Not only that, but he's returning to school for the fall semester this year, Around August 22nd, to earn his Master's, which will increase his income even further! And don't forget about how much fucking compound interest he's going to earn from having so much saved already by this age! Not only that, but if he does the sensible and ethical thing and remains child free*, that simply vastly increases his potential even further.
If his average earnings over 30 years are 150k and 200k, respectively, he'll earn 4.5 and 6.5 million over his lifetime! He could feasibly earn substantially more.
http://www.moneychimp.com/calculator/compound_interest_calculator.htm
Also, at a current principle of 300K with 50K added each year (I could easily maintain this savings rate, even with the cost of living of SF.) over 30 years and at 8% annual interest, he'll end up with 8.6 million from it in addition to the rest of his money!
Lanny is literally on track to have a net worth of over 10 million dollars! This may sound like a lot, a completely unrealistic amount to most, but I know him well enough and, no, it genuinely is a realistic estimate. Even before then he's going to reach millionaire status by age 30 at least, become a genuine multimillionaire relatively rapidly.
Lanny is going to be one rich as fucking nigger!
*Lanny, I swear to god you'd better start seriously researching, pondering, the detrimental effects of having children as well as taking anti-natalist philosophy seriously (r/antinatalism is not a good representation of this. One of my strongest beliefs is that anti-natalist theory and what it leads to, what stems from it, is one of the most valuable truths/insights in the entire field of philosophy, with genuinely profound practical potential effects on the lives of individuals and the world.). Anti-natalism is one of the most profound truths of existence, the creation of life the most immoral and selfish act you can commit. Any biological desires and emotions that arise do not matter. You need to see through what's driving them, gain mastery over yourself, and cast them aside, overcome them, and hold firm to your values. You cannot go half way on being a parent, it is not something you compromise on or should ever do if either you or your partner are on the fence. I swear to god I'm so concerned you're goingto end up with a woman, who have an immensely high chance of eventually desiring children (Even adopting has too harmful of an effect to your life, ethics aside.), especially if you make the incredibly foolish mistake of marrying her (Do not get married either, it is nothing but a legal contract and there is no need for it to validate your relationship. Look at the rates of long-term cohabitation in the Nordic region, this is the ideal cultural shift. So many critiques of this idiotic act.). Unfortunately we don't have schools on love, the most important aspect of most people's lives, and almost no one researches it in depth, the biological, particularly neurological and endocrine, underpinnings. The implications of the gene centric view of evolution, how it drives you to behavior harmful to yourself and others, unethical actions. Human psychology, profound cognitive biases, the evolutionary roots of man, society and culture etc. Then again, considering the kind of women you may be drawn to, how spineless and cowardly you could well be, at least at this point of your life and level of personal development, along with your fear of ending up alone, likely being unable to leave someone when necessary, and potentially avoiding a serious discussion on this subject and analysis of who they are, their views/justifications, to gauge whether they're likely to change their minds or at a high risk of doing so, it wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if it did end up happening, and I guarantee you will regret it for the rest of your life.
*Slaps the shit out of you! One god strike across the face sending you flying across the room and to the ground, on the verge of breaking your cheek bone.*
GET A VASECTOMY AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, YOU HAVE TO MUCH POTENTIAL TO RISK WASTING IT, RUINING IT, OVER THIS. I SWEAR TO GOD IF I EVER FIND OUT YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE CHILDREN I'LL TRACK DOWN YOU AND YOUR PARTNER AND DRUG HER WITH AN ABORTIFACIENT. I FEEL LIKE CHANNELING MY INNER EXTREMELY ABUSIVE ALCOHOLIC FATHER AND STRANGLING YOU IF YOU'RE EVEN CONSIDERING THIS!!! -
2017-08-01 at 2:56 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSEdit: Fuck off Captain Falcon, I'm not putting this and spoilers and no one gives a shit about your idiotic TL;DR posts, as well as your worthless opinions. Stop belittling me when I genuinely have noble intentions, this has nothing to do with ego glorification, attempting to portray an unrealistically positive image of myself to impress others.
What the hell? This is all that's required for a neuroscience degree? I had the impression that it would be among the most difficult majors: http://www.neuroscience.pitt.edu/programs/undergraduate/degree-requirements.php
By this point I've literally spent 1,000+ hours reading about neuroscience, pouring over countless papers. That's not even an exaggeration, 1000/780 (2 years) = a mere 1.3 hours per day. That's nothing to me with the way I autistically hyper-obsess. There's also the aspect of my highly abnormal reading speed and memory.
The brain is a system, arguably the most complex we've found. Hyper-systemizing is a well established aspect of Asperger's and I'm at the extreme right tail end of a group that's already at the extreme right tail end of the general population to begin with. It's impossible to provide a concise explanation of how my mind functions and why, the process that has been occurring over a lifetime, particularly the last 15 years, to reach this point. I came to understand the fundamentals of life, the interconnection of countless subjects, information, how things stem from each other, and now I can see the countless underlying patterns that permeate everything I value.
There are countless mysteries, problems to solve. Considerably different from philosophy, in a manner, we haven't come close to a full understanding, to the point where it becomes excruciatingly difficult to develop new advancements, novel theories and findings. There are constantly new possibilities that can be uncovered, so many immensely valuable problems to solve.
Along with that, of course prospects for a career, income, would be far more promising. Despite my unbelievably low needs and expenditures, I do need money. I'll readily admit I'm somewhat terrible with money, in the following sense, because I value it so little relative to others and neglect it to pursue my extremely obsessive interests. I simply have, have had, so much more time than the average person to pursue multiple fields. Money does have immense value and potential, of course. At the very least I could pile it into a low fee index fund and easily manage to rapidly reach the point where I've attained lifelong financial independence, extremely early semi-retirement, where I'll never have to work again solely or primarily for the money.
What I'm planning to do is to put serious effort into writing my magnum opus on a general theory/explanation of the neurology of autism over the next two years, or however long it takes to fully refine, and see where it gets me.
I know for certain it's going to end up being ridiculously long. This is going to take an immense amount of effort and time to properly write. At the very least my memory allows me to remember every single reference/paper I'll need, my exceptional talent for working with information, finding exactly what I need, the highest quality sources, and analyzing it. I'm just going to have to consistently devote some of my free time to fleshing it out bit by bit.
Fuck some 2-FMA would be fucking fantastic for this. Lanny, please! If you ever decide to get more, locate a good source, buy extra and split it with me so I can get it at a lower cost! I'm sorry for everything I did, my response to anything negative, when my feelings get hurt or pride injured, can just be completely out of control and it's only damaged myself by making me suffer, become absolutely miserable, and completely isolate myself for so long. I can come to a convenient location for you, of course we don't even have to meet, you can just tape it to the underside of something, find a simple stash spot to leave it in outside. Of course I would never have actually gone through with any threats, I never have and I'm all talk, just like nearly all people on the internet, especially hardcore extremely isolated autists with profound anxiety problems, genuine agoraphobia and anthropophobia, the inability to follow through with anything that requires serious effort or risk! You know how pathetic I am. This is important, you said you were rooting for me, right? And this isn't even a selfish desire at all, in the conventional sense, it's about the pursuit of knowledge and if I actually manage to contribute something to the field of science, some time far in the future, realistically, stemming from my extreme specialization, understanding of (I am a bonafide aspie and my understanding of myself, my own life, what led to everything, has provided me with immensely valuable insights.), autism, think of how incredible that would be, how much suffering could be eased, even potentially paving the way for insights into extraordinary human ability and general intelligence!
Post last edited by Malice at 2017-08-01T02:58:57.681199+00:00 -
2017-08-01 at 2:29 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
Originally posted by Piles of Crack I'm going to get ECT, fuck this bullshit. I'm barely functional at this point.
Fuck yeah you should.
I asked you before, but I don't recall if you answered. You stated you were approved for it quite a while ago, why didn't you ever get it?
ECT is a great choice. Hold out, there are some extreme promising drugs and treatments that may be out within a few years. Oh, yeah, I completely understand what it's like to be at the brink of suicide, near the maximum level of depression for years with severe issues that have been building up over a lifetime. Being told to hold out for years is like being told to put up with torture most waking hours for years. Then there's how it warps your mind, you don't even see a reason to live, want to, and can come up with countless reasons for why it's hopeless and meaningless/pointless anyway.
Transcranial magnetic stimulation may/will probably be covered by most insurance, eventually.
Did you ever buy NSI-189? The freebase version is great and works fast. It was powerful enough on its own to prevent the severe SAD I regularly experienced, which was horrific because I was already near the max level of depression at my baseline to begin with, so it caused a double dip effect where I completely lost all energy and drive and pretty just hibernated for 4+ months depressed as fuck. It's what caused me to stop lifting weights multiple times. NSI is especially powerful if you combine it with jogging or HIIT, just 20 minutes of good effort works great. Suck it up and do it, you'll see what I'm talking about. You can't miss the after effect. The exercise on its own already provides a substantial boost to mood and cognition, but of course you won't (I don't mean this as an insult, I mean I completely understand because I sure as hell didn't either, just being trapped in bed all day.) do it when at that level of depression. The thing is, it rapidly alleviates it so fast, begins to alter you so keep craving the effect, it can become almost addictive, makes it immeasurably easier to make it into a habit and keep improving. -
2017-07-31 at 7:50 PM UTC in the way to fix America's health insurance problemIn the long-run smokers and the obese may actually incur substantially lower costs due to the extreme expenses of end of life care.
Further support against authoritarian-paternalistic statist policies. -
2017-07-31 at 5:49 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS
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2017-07-31 at 2:17 PM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDS^ Thank god, at least you admit your alleged 150+ IQ and sense of elitism don't amount to shit.
I've blatantly admitted in the past I didn't expect to ever get it together and accomplish anything due to the numerous intractable problems I saw in my life, how long this had been ongoing and my clear pattern of behavior, that if I was another person I would bet against me, and that I was planning to commit suicide within a few years.
At least I was honest and not utterly delusional like you. Even now I have no way of knowing, it's impossible to guarantee or accurately predict, how things will turn out. -
2017-07-31 at 2:10 PM UTC in THE OFISH 2017 COLLAGE THREAD!!!Guh, you look so pudgy and dead inside. Completely unremarkable, the kind of person you never notice IRL.
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2017-07-31 at 9:34 AM UTC in Things that women are better atThat’s probably not a good sign.
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2017-07-31 at 9:32 AM UTC in The Retarded Thread: Click Here for AIDSI’m seriously starting to consider whether I’ve finally reached the point where a lack of sex could be driving me insane.
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2017-07-31 at 8:23 AM UTC in Things that women are better atThese hoes ain't loyal.
