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  1. #1
    stl1 Dark Matter
    No Bull: Scientists Potty Train Cows to Use ‘MooLoo’
    Turns out cows can be potty trained as easily as toddlers. Maybe easier.
    Associated Press

    Turns out cows can be potty trained as easily as toddlers. Maybe easier.

    It’s no bull. Scientists put the task to the test and 11 out of 16 cows learned to use the “MooLoo” when they had to go.

    Just like some parents, the researchers used a sweet treat to coax the cows to push through a gate and urinate in a special pen. And it took only 15 days to train the young calves. Some kids take quite a bit longer.

    “The cows are at least as good as children, age 2 to 4 years, at least as quick,” said study senior author Lindsay Matthews, an animal behavioral scientist at New Zealand’s University of Auckland who worked with colleagues on the tests at an indoor animal research lab in Germany.

    What started with a half-in-jest question on a New Zealand radio talk show about the very real problem of livestock waste resulted in a serious study published Monday in the journal Current Biology. And it wasn’t just a “wow, this could be fun” academic question. Massive amounts of urine waste is a serious environmental issue, Matthews said.

    Urine contains nitrogen, and when mixed with feces becomes ammonia, which is an environmental issue with acid rain and other problems, Matthews said. It can also taint the water with nitrates and create the airborne pollutant nitrous oxide, he said.

    And cows do pee a lot. A single cow can produce about 8 gallons (30 liters) of urine a day, Matthews said. In 2019, nitrous oxide comprised 7% of all the U.S. greenhouse gases, according to the Environmental Protection Agency.

    “I am not surprised they can train calves to urinate in set locations, but I am surprised no one has demonstrated this before,” said Duke University animal cognition scientist Brian Hare, who wasn’t part of the research. “The critical question is can it and will it scale?”

    If it could be done, toilet training animals makes it easier to manage waste products and reduce greenhouse gas emissions, said Donald Broom, a professor of animal welfare at the University of Cambridge in England.

    At the lab is Dummerstorf, Germany, the researchers mimicked a toddler’s training, putting the cows in the special pen, waiting until they urinated and then giving them a reward: a sweet liquid of mostly molasses. Cows do have a sweet tooth, Matthews said. If the cows urinated outside the MooLoo after the initial training, they got a squirt of cold water.

    Then in two sets of experiments, the researchers let the Holstein cows roam about the indoor facility. When they had to urinate, 11 of them pushed into the pen, did their business, and got their sweet reward.

    There are a couple caveats to this experiment.

    No. 1, they gave diuretics to the cattle to get them to urinate more because they had limited time to run the experiments under ethics guidelines.

    And No. 2, they didn’t do No. 2. They only trained cows to use the MooLoo to urinate, not defecate.

    Urine is a bigger problem, at least in Europe, Matthews said. But he predicted they could train cows to poop in a certain place too.

    While dogs, cats and horses can be toilet trained, they already show the desire to go in special places, but cows don’t, Matthews said.

    The biggest environmental problem for livestock, though, is the heat-trapping gas methane they emit in belches and flatulence, a significant source of global warming. The cows can’t be trained not to belch or fart, Matthews said: “They would blow up.”
  2. #2
    stl1 Dark Matter
    Who wouldn't love to have their very own pet cow?

  3. #3
    Donald Trump Space Nigga
    This thread should have been about Russian hookers
  4. #4
    stl1 Dark Matter
    Or cows peeing on flat rocks.

    Trump Pee Tape: Social Media Abuzz After Leaked Russian Document Hints It Exists
    By Parwinder Sandhu

    After reports of Russian President Vladimir Putin being in possession of potentially compromising material about Donald Trump surfaced, the talks about the infamous 'Pee Tape' re-emerged on social media. Many netizens urged the immediate release of the mysterious tape.

    The Guardian has accessed the secret documents from Kremlin which spoke about Putin personally authorizing a secret spy agency operation to back Trump during the 2016 US presidential election.

    Russian Documents Describe Trump as Mentally Unstable

    According to The Guardian, in a meeting held on 22 January 2016, the Russian president, along with his spy chiefs and ministers, agreed that Trump as the US President would help them secure strategic objectives. The objectives included 'social turmoil' in the US and a weakening of the American president's negotiating position.

    Later, the three Russian spy agencies were asked to find practical ways to support Trump, in a decree appearing to bear Putin's signature, the outlet claimed.

    The outlet further stated that the report, "No 32-04 vd", is classified as secret. It says Trump is the "most promising candidate" from the Kremlin's point of view. The word in Russian is perspektivny. There is a brief psychological assessment of Trump, who is described as an "impulsive, mentally unstable and unbalanced individual who suffers from an inferiority complex", The Guardian quoted the secret report.

    What is the Pee Tape About?

    The Guardian also claimed that the Kremlin possesses kompromat, or potentially compromising material, on Trump, which was collected, the document says, from his earlier "non-official visits to Russian Federation territory". The paper refers to "certain events" that happened during Trump's trips to Moscow.

    The reports were enough to bring back the talk of Trump's infamous Pee Tape. According to The Cut, the Pee Tape was first mentioned in the Steele Dossier, which included the details of the incident which allegedly took place at the at the Moscow based Ritz-Carlton on 2013.

    According to the outlet, it reportedly shows Trump in the presidential suite of the hotel, watching two prostitutes pee on a bed the Obamas supposedly slept in. The incident allegedly took place in 2013, when Trump was visiting Moscow to attend the Miss Universe pageant, the outlet claimed.

    The reports of the leaked document soon flared up the social media with many claiming that the Kremlin should release the tape.

    "#SteeleDossier We've have been waiting for the #TrumpPeeTape for such a long time. "The Good Fight" talked a lot about it. I know it's out there. Let's do this!" tweeted a user.

    "After catching up on all the Putin/Trump stuff...I've concluded that the pee tape 100% exists," wrote another.

    "Well, the kompromat (? pee tape) was all but confirmed by the Kremlin leak yesterday, so we can live in hope a jail cell awaits Trump at some point, for whatever reason," tweeted one.
  5. #5
    Donald Trump Space Nigga
    Made up shit never dies.
  6. #6
    stl1 Dark Matter
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